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HAPPY BIRTHDAY
I Hope you and your retarded
baby are doing well!
I Hope you and your retarded
baby are doing well!
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
What are you now, fourteen? Fifteen?
Oh, they grow up so fast!
Now that you're a married woman with a baby of your own, you'll soon realize how fast your own child will grow up.sigpic
The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
- Proverbs 15:3
CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL
CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Happy Birthday Naomi,
Are you cooking Aaron something special?
YIC
JackGenesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
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I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Oh crap, that's right, that's today.
I suppose she'll be expecting some sort of gift. Does anybody have any ideas? What do women like these days. Groceries? Fancy lightbulbs? A new shovel? I'm at a loss.
Happy birthday Naomi, I'll see you when I get back into town a week from Wednesday.sigpic
Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!
God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!
Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Congrats Aaron. Will you be at Landover Mens Club tonight? Dinner and drinks are on me in celebration.
If you feel compelled to spend money one her (I know how yoiu newly weds are), may I suggest a nice mop?Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
This is what I bought my wife for her birthday and he is very happy with it.Originally posted by Capt. Aaron Portway View PostOh crap, that's right, that's today.
I suppose she'll be expecting some sort of gift. Does anybody have any ideas? What do women like these days. Groceries? Fancy lightbulbs? A new shovel? I'm at a loss.
It saved her having to get down on her knees to clean the house with a dustpan and brush.
She did hint at a vacuum cleaner but I can't bare the noise.
Ecclesiastes 3:8 A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
YIC
JackGenesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
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I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
My wife literally wept with joy when I got her one of those new electric vacuum machines for our wedding anniversary, and it gives her some free time at the end of the day to get rested up for her "wifely duties" during the evening!Originally posted by Capt. Aaron Portway View PostOh crap, that's right, that's today.
I suppose she'll be expecting some sort of gift. Does anybody have any ideas? What do women like these days. Groceries? Fancy lightbulbs? A new shovel? I'm at a loss.
Happy birthday Naomi, I'll see you when I get back into town a week from Wednesday.
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
A Blessed Birthday to you, Mrs. Portway!Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Happy Birthday, Mrs. Portway. I hope your husband takes you out and gives you some nice jewelry.1 Corinthians 11:3
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Is there some sort of cookware she is collecting? I'm partial to Cast Iron, but I haven't been in her kitchen in so long, I don't remember her preferences.Originally posted by Capt. Aaron Portway View PostOh crap, that's right, that's today.
I suppose she'll be expecting some sort of gift. Does anybody have any ideas? What do women like these days. Groceries? Fancy lightbulbs? A new shovel? I'm at a loss.
Happy birthday Naomi, I'll see you when I get back into town a week from Wednesday.
I'm a little confused about the Pyrex. On the one hand, the only place to get the good stuff is in the thrift stores, but now, After this thread I am not so sure. On the other hand, I am convinced that the new stuff is a sign of end times.
I'll leave the decision in your manly capable hands.Drama queenComment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Originally posted by august View Post
AHEM!
1st Timothy 2:9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Peter 3:3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;Drama queenComment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Mr Portway, I like to make my own gifts from wildflowers or foliage which can be woven into the lovliest designs. Alternatively, some local produce picked from the meadow such as wild mushrooms or berries is also a lovely gift idea (and you don't have to waste time weaving foliage (hawthorn or privet, say)). On a wooden plate maybe?Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Happy birthday, Mrs. Portway, and may you have a blessed day.Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
Hands off, boy. The White girls around here aren't interested in what you're selling.Originally posted by teddybear View Post
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!Comment
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Re: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Mrs. Naomi Portway
I got you a 8"x10" poster of Pastor Zeke. If you're really nice, I'll get his secretary to sign it in his name.Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.
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