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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
12-27-2008, 09:56 PM
As the Wise Men journey towards the manger in Bethlehem, it is a good time to remind ourselves of the presents they brought for the Baby Jesus; gold, frankincense and myrrh. Now, it is proposed by the scholars of the 19th century that these gifts were appropriate because gold represented Christ the King, Frankincence is for anointing and healing Exodus 30:34 and symbolizes sinlessness Lev:5:11 and myrrh is used to anoint a body (John 19:39), and thus that they foretold of the King of Heaven, sinless and eventually dying (temporarily.)
All well and good, but is this the correct interpretation? We must bear in mind that the significance is only man made – It does not say in the Bible why the Wise Men chose these gifts. Remember, these men were wise – really wise! If they were that wise, they would know that foretelling the future is a sin!
Read this question here
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I would appreciate learning more about Myrrh and why it is useful as an enema additive in the treatment of prostata trouble.
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Note then the answer,
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Frankincense and myrrh are both resins that come from trees of the genus Boswellia (frankincense) and Commiphora (myrrh). Boswellia extract has been found to be possibly helpful in the treatment of the prostate as well as a number of other maladies.
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OK, that leaves gold. Consider the way an enema has to be administered; the last thing you want is sharp edges. Gold is extremely ductile and soft. If you are going to have something inserted, then surely there is an advantage in its being gold.
Let us not stop here but refer ourselves to a great biblical scholar, Prune Danish, who, in this post puts forward solid reasoning to show that Jesus was crucified when he was about 46 years old. A little early for prostate trouble, but not unheard of.
I think that Jesus would have appreciated something for His prostate more than a few gifts “foretelling” something.
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Posts: 63
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
12-29-2008, 04:58 AM
I don't believe that Jesus ever defecated.
If humans evolved from monkeys, why are there still monkeys?
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Sinner Who Has Found the Truth©
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
12-29-2008, 04:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherBill
I don't believe that Jesus ever defecated.
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Actually angels carried it away.
Leviticus 26:27-29
27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
12-29-2008, 05:33 PM
Did they even have prostate trouble back then? I don't remember reading anything about it.
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
12-30-2008, 09:39 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King
Did they even have prostate trouble back then? I don't remember reading anything about it.
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'Prostate' is the proper translation of 'locusts'.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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compassion personified
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
01-07-2009, 11:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SayvedByTheLord
Actually angels carried it away.
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... and then dumped it on what is now known as the Gaza Strip, if my sources are correct.
What an honour for those angels, Brother Sayved.
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Tin Tither
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
01-08-2009, 05:30 PM
Im' old enough now that the doctor has to check my prostrate i have it done at the Landover center for creation medicine the doctor always takes a long time checking my prostrate he says its' important to do a good job cause its' so important to mens' health and all.
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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
01-08-2009, 09:20 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy-Roy Stewart
Im' old enough now that the doctor has to check my prostrate i have it done at the Landover center for creation medicine the doctor always takes a long time checking my prostrate he says its' important to do a good job cause its' so important to mens' health and all.
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Is that Dr. Cecil Hardpole? I’m just saying, make sure you can’t see both his hands when he’s examining you… I’m just saying that you understand…? Don't read anything into it.
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Sinner Who Has Found the Truth©
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
01-08-2009, 09:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire
Is that Dr. Cecil Hardpole? I’m just saying, make sure you can’t see both his hands when he’s examining you… I’m just saying that you understand…? Don't read anything into it.
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I must go to my prayer closet now.
Leviticus 26:27-29
27 And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me;
28 Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.
29 And ye shall eat the flesh of your sons, and the flesh of your daughters shall ye eat.
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Unsaved trash, papist dog
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Location: St. Sebastian Catholic Church
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
01-09-2009, 08:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy-Roy Stewart
Im' old enough now that the doctor has to check my prostrate i have it done at the Landover center for creation medicine the doctor always takes a long time checking my prostrate he says its' important to do a good job cause its' so important to mens' health and all.
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Should you ever move to my diocese, I can heartily recommend the prostate center at Pope Julius III Catholic Hospital.
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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Posts: 22,744
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
01-09-2009, 10:11 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Father Peter Rast
Should you ever move to my diocese, I can heartily recommend the prostate center at Pope Julius III Catholic Hospital.
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I could not imagine a worse place for a Christian man to visit. None of us will have missed the reference to that homer pederast.
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
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Re: Jesus and Prostate Trouble -
01-13-2009, 03:34 PM
I'm surprised that after all this time, the local death-cookie-munchers haven't responded to Brother Bathfire to say that the Renaissance popes were just misunderstood , or some such. Who is going to rev up the Romanist spin machine? Major Tom? Mo?
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