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Reload this Page 1988 Ford Tempo (needs head gasket) - $250
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Default 1988 Ford Tempo (needs head gasket) - $250 - 11-07-2007, 01:50 AM

Folks, I found a homeless family stranded in a corn field off I-35 today and have convinced them to sell their last worldly possession so that our Lord Jesus Christ might return their gift to LBC a thousand times. I was just wondering if anybody might be willing to pay $250?

PS It does have new tires.
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Default Re: 1988 Ford Tempo (needs head gasket) - $250 - 11-07-2007, 03:09 AM

What is that, some sort of compact car? I would never drive anything like that, most likely I'd be mistaken for a homosexual and would endupwith sodomite perverts tailgating me in hopes of catching me in a public washroom.

SUVs are the only acceptable vehicle for patriotic Americans, and even they are being sissified by "hybrid" (even it's name suggests bisexuality!) designs.

Gentlemen, it is time to replace SUVs with a more patriotic vehicle. A vehicle that proudly tells the world the oil is OURS, nature is no use to us when we get raptured (very soon!), and bigger is better.

So, what vehicle will it be?

Here's the first entry into the contest:

http://www.limotrack.co.uk/

Quote:
For sixteen passengers...this unique Limousine with a military theme, Hardman LimoTrack, is a truly memorable experience in a genuine ex MOD full tracked, all terrain, amphibious personnel carrier...



An addition since its Army days is a cooler which can be stocked with beer, a magnum of champagne or soft drinks...

The "banging" music video system, custom designed and installed by KINGSTON CAR SOUND is the best in any Limousine in the city...

There is a smoke machine and some cool lighting in a vehicle guaranteed to turn heads, in fact you have our assurance that it will attract EVERYONE’s attention....allow people to see and hear you and your friends partying...



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Default Re: 1988 Ford Tempo (needs head gasket) - $250 - 11-07-2007, 07:08 AM

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Originally Posted by Jeb Thurmond View Post
What is that, some sort of compact car? I would never drive anything like that, most likely I'd be mistaken for a homosexual and would endupwith sodomite perverts tailgating me in hopes of catching me in a public washroom...
And I would never allow one of our members (even Lilith) to be seen in such a dirty little &hitbox (forgive me Jesus) of a car. I am hoping to sell it to a heathen or perhaps an illegal Mexxicant without a driver's license. But if I am unable to sell it, I might just sell it back to the homeless family (seems like they're getting a little cold standing out in that corn field).


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Default Re: 1988 Ford Tempo (needs head gasket) - $250 - 11-07-2007, 08:39 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
Folks, I found a homeless family stranded in a corn field off I-35 today and have convinced them to sell their last worldly possession so that our Lord Jesus Christ might return their gift to LBC a thousand times. I was just wondering if anybody might be willing to pay $250?

PS It does have new tires.
That was a real fine gesture by you Mama Glendy.

If they're getting cold out in the field perhaps you should be making them do some work to keep warm?
Jesus hates laziness. The kids could maybe do some Chimney cleaning? Or if the parents were willing, maybe they could sell them?



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Default Re: 1988 Ford Tempo (needs head gasket) - $250 - 11-07-2007, 01:25 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
or perhaps an illegal Mexxicant without a driver's license.
I'll give you $250 myself if you can fill it up with beaners and get them to drive it back over the border. I don't think they'll come back; all they're really looking for is a place to live. That 88 Tempo will seem like a mansion compared to a scrap metal hut.
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