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Default Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-16-2015, 08:01 PM

Brothers in Christ, the day is soon here. In just a couple of days, the new Star Wars movie has its premiere throughout the nation. I think you all heard about the ungodlyness of these movies and their fans, known as Trekkies, in yesterday's sermon.

We will not tolerate this! As the chairman of Landover's Protest Committee I have decided that on friday, the day of the premiere at 10:00 PM Central Time, we will descend upon Flix Brewhouse in Des Moines during the screening. Unfortuently since our last picket of the James Bond premiere, members of Landover Baptist Church are banned from anywhere within 600 yards of any Des Moines movie theatre. But don't worry, I have the perfect plan!

Remember the Rocky Horror Picture Show picket back in 1998 where we infiltrated the audience by dressing up as characters from the movie, when Pastor Zeke, dressed as Dr. Frank-N-Furter was brutally beaten down, handcuffed and tazed by the Des Moines PD?

This is also my plan this time. We will all dress up as trekkies, e.g, characters from the Star Wars franchise and enter Flix Brewhouse without a problem. Halfway throughout the movie, we will take off the masks, unfold the signs and preach the gospel once and for all for the unsaved trekkie audience! Do not expect them to take it lightly. We can expect to be yelled at, to be beaten, ridiculed and persecuted by the trekkies, and possibly be violently arrested and tazed by the Des Moines PD. However, if just as little one gets the message and gives up their sinful trekkie lifestyle, we have saved a soul from an eternity of damnation!

Considering how trekkies are prone to using violence for anything, I personally suggest all of you to bring at least 1 pistol each as concealed carry, just in case. Better be safe than sorry.

Stay tuned.
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Eagle Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-17-2015, 12:04 AM

Just like before, we can use the Youth Ministry Ice Cream Truck for tactical transport and as a mobile command center.

Also, Brother Jensen, I'd like to volunteer our Youth Ministry Street Team to man the bathrooms to make sure the men dressed as princesses don't attack the boys before they are saved. As you know, we have a highly advanced surveillance system on hand we keep for this specific purpose. If we all pull out our stops and show them what we've got, this could turn into a major blow for everyone! I'm so excited!


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-Youth Minister Harry Lester
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Default Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-17-2015, 03:40 PM

Star Wars is the name of an American defense initiative to protect the United States from attacks by ballistic strategic nuclear weapons. It was announced by President Ronald Reagan on March 23, 1983. I am sure Obama found some way to sabotage it into utter uselessness as he did with all our defensive capabilities.

It is a abomination that these Disney gays now stole the title for one of their horrible movies. This is not the America God wants for us.

I won't be attending the picket by the way. My hand is still hurting from bashing in my television the last time Hillary Clinton was on.


Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Default Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-18-2015, 12:35 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man View Post
Star Wars is the name of an American defense initiative to protect the United States from attacks by ballistic strategic nuclear weapons. It was announced by President Ronald Reagan on March 23, 1983. I am sure Obama found some way to sabotage it into utter uselessness as he did with all our defensive capabilities.
I already bought my tickets thinking it was for the defense program. SATAN TRICKED ME AGAIN!
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Default Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-18-2015, 01:23 AM

Cranky Old Man - God Bless!! Star Wars IS the American Defense! Reagan said it best on that sunny but cold March 23rd afternoon, 2:30pm, 1983. The fact that "o"Bama still has yet to increase funding for s.e.t.i., star wars wonderer, and cern sphere furthers the point that WE Christ's people need to DO SOMETHING.

Bjorn.. Crazy Old Man... yf Harry ... acuopofwater37...

ARE YOU TUNED?! .. 'cause I'm on pitch to throw down some prayers for Christ!

-Lord let the Trekkies see the light
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Default Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-18-2015, 02:38 AM

Why don't you two fellows trot on over to the introduction forum and properly introduce yourselves. The world is in chaos. The wicked are around every corner. We like to know who we are fellowshipping with.

God Bless!


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Default Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-18-2015, 04:21 AM

Considering that Disney is behind the latest entry in the Star Wars franchise, I predict that it will be even more evil this time. That is hard to imagine as the previous entries has been orgies of idolatry, false beliefs and sublimal messages promoting Muslim terrorism. But if its Disney it also has to be more evil. Star Wars is evil in itself, but Disney is always more evil.

It is only a matter of time before America sees it's first Trekkie terrorist attack, marking the start of the Star Wars. And therefore, Donald Trump should ban all Trekkies from entering the United States.





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Default Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-18-2015, 04:52 AM

Star Wars resembles today's America.

Watch the Godly Alex Jones expose the truth!



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Default Re: Trekkies beware: Landover Baptist to picket Star Wars premiere - 12-18-2015, 08:27 AM

It used to be all so simple. Time was use could use their colour to tell who was the villain.

There was the menecing black one (prone to violence and murder) and the blonde haired, blue eyed hero (exactly like Jesus, btw).

Now can't tell who is good (the Federation) and who is bad (the Shadows) just by looking at their colour. That confuses me.

YIC


1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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