Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > MEET CHRISTIAN SINGLES!
Reload this Page POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!!
MEET CHRISTIAN SINGLES! Who knows? The love of your life might be here! All the single men are GODLY and all the single ladies are virgins...........for the most part.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#21)
Old
MacDaddy's Avatar
MacDaddy MacDaddy is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
 
Posts: 48
Join Date: Jan 2008
MacDaddy is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-20-2008, 03:29 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Stop the presses. Exactly when did I say this?

Well, you said it here.

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showt...light=macdaddy


Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
As of now, Landover Baptist Church is the legal guardian of Miss Jennifer. If you'd like to discuss matrimony, click on that Paypal button below and send your *shekels to Jesus.
and i paid, you can check the paypal records, so perhaps you can remove the infraction points


- - - - - - - - - - -
Its not fascism if True Christians™ do it
- - - - - - - - - -
Reply With Quote
(#22)
Old
MacDaddy's Avatar
MacDaddy MacDaddy is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
 
Posts: 48
Join Date: Jan 2008
MacDaddy is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-20-2008, 03:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Unsaved trash are not allowed to court True Christian™ ladies.

There is another solution as well, I have shown great enthusiasm and tithed regularly, perhaps.. if it isn't too much trouble, I could be upgraded to member


- - - - - - - - - - -
Its not fascism if True Christians™ do it
- - - - - - - - - -
Reply With Quote
(#23)
Old
Only time will tell's Avatar
Only time will tell Only time will tell is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 38
Join Date: Jan 2008
Only time will tell is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 02:54 AM

i am just gonna sum this thread up real quick for all those who came in late.

BarbarianBoi23882:He all j00 sexy ladies, u wan sum secks? lololol i'm cool amiright?!
the ladies: teehee little boys are fun!
the older ladies: TRAMPS! wheres my diaper?
BarbarianBoi23882: why you making fun o me!? ur old and imma tell mah mummy on u!? ;-;
mr. cool: i own you jennyd, cuz that guy over there on the internets said so.
jennyd: Orly?
zeky'ol'boy: no wai!
BarbarianBoi23882: HULK SMAAAAAAAAAASH
(some details were left out due to losing interest in post)
Reply With Quote
(#24)
Old
VictoryOS's Avatar
VictoryOS VictoryOS is offline
True Christian™ Beauty Queen
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Christian Beauty True Christian Lady True Christian Homemaker True Heterosexual™ Best Pie Tin Tither Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Eats the Most Pork Christian Love Victory Over Sex True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Kirk Cameron Fan Club Paula Deen Negro Support Group Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Roper Crossburn Trumpette Home Schooled Saved 5 Years 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College Long service medal, 3rd class Trump of GOD Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus GLORY Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 5,447
Join Date: Dec 2007
VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!VictoryOS will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 03:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Only time will tell View Post
i am just gonna sum this thread up real quick for all those who came in late.

BarbarianBoi23882:He all j00 sexy ladies, u wan sum secks? lololol i'm cool amiright?!
the ladies: teehee little boys are fun!
the older ladies: TRAMPS! wheres my diaper?
BarbarianBoi23882: why you making fun o me!? ur old and imma tell mah mummy on u!? ;-;
mr. cool: i own you jennyd, cuz that guy over there on the internets said so.
jennyd: Orly?
zeky'ol'boy: no wai!
BarbarianBoi23882: HULK SMAAAAAAAAAASH
(some details were left out due to losing interest in post)
Friend, how many of the drugs have you been taking?
Reply With Quote
(#25)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 06:33 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MacDaddy View Post
Well, you said it here.

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showt...light=macdaddy




and i paid, you can check the paypal records, so perhaps you can remove the infraction points
What I said was after you tithed, we could DISCUSS matrimony. We have no intention of selling sister Jenny cheap. Especially to unsaved trash.

Feel free to discuss.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#26)
Old
Only time will tell's Avatar
Only time will tell Only time will tell is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 38
Join Date: Jan 2008
Only time will tell is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 06:53 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by VictoryOS View Post
Friend, how many of the drugs have you been taking?
i have to say, every post you've ever made that i've bothered to read involves accusing some one of being on "the drugs"

i think your hiding something, but to respond in futility, i have never done any drugs, and have only had one pina colada *however it's spelt* with rum.

i'm twenty one years of age.
i doubt many other of my peers could say the same.
Reply With Quote
(#27)
Old
The Widow Anna's Avatar
The Widow Anna The Widow Anna is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ True Christian Lady Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture

 
Posts: 107
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Unsaved wildnerness of Australia.
The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 11:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Only time will tell View Post
i'm twenty one years of age.
i doubt many other of my peers could say the same.
I think it's likely they could say the same, if they're twenty.
Elsewise, they're probably just too wasted on fag-worthy cocktails and drugs to slur it out.


"She was of a great age, and had lived with a husband seven years from her virginity; And she was a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day" - Luke 2:36-37
Reply With Quote
(#28)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 11:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Only time will tell View Post

i'm twenty one years of age.
i doubt many other of my peers could say the same.
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Widow Anna View Post
I think it's likely they could say the same, if they're twenty.
Elsewise, they're probably just too wasted on fag-worthy cocktails and drugs to slur it out.
Amen, sister.

I think what he's trying to say is that all of his friends are crackheads and narcotics pushers who have either overdosed or have died in a hail of Godly police bullets. Either way, Jesus killed them and He'll get around to killing "only time" too.

The amount of marijuana this kid must be on, to make such imbecilic posts, is staggering.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#29)
Old
The Widow Anna's Avatar
The Widow Anna The Widow Anna is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ True Christian Lady Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture

 
Posts: 107
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Unsaved wildnerness of Australia.
The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.The Widow Anna has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 12:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Amen, sister.

I think what he's trying to say is that all of his friends are crackheads and narcotics pushers who have either overdosed or have died in a hail of Godly police bullets. Either way, Jesus killed them and He'll get around to killing "only time" too.

The amount of marijuana this kid must be on, to make such imbecilic posts, is staggering.
No doubt that's what be means, knowing the way youth are today. However, the young should probably learn to say what they mean properly and with decent grammar! If I wrote such nonsense in my teenage years, well, I wouldn't be around to tell you about it today, Pastor!


"She was of a great age, and had lived with a husband seven years from her virginity; And she was a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day" - Luke 2:36-37
Reply With Quote
(#30)
Old
Brother Temperance's Avatar
Brother Temperance Brother Temperance is offline
Senior Usher
True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
A very nice young man
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Real American™ Long service medal, 2nd class Christian Love Saved 5 Years The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking True Heterosexual™ Ex-Christ-Killer Public Awareness Medal Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus TC Bravery Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork Ex-Brit True Republican Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Brother Temperance will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 01-21-2008, 04:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Only time will tell View Post
i am just gonna sum this thread up real quick for all those who came in late.

BarbarianBoi23882:He all j00 sexy ladies...
Friend, there are no joos on our forums, with the exception of the retarded Iraqi terrorist Jewsef, and he's hardly what you'd call a sexy lady.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Only time will tell View Post
i think your hiding something, but to respond in futility, i have never done any drugs, and have only had one pina colada *however it's spelt* with rum.

i'm twenty one years of age.
Do you have any friends, boy? If I were an unsaved young man, then to try and vainly attempt to fill the void in my heart left by the absence of Christ, I would dedicate myself to drinking vast quantities of strong cider with impressionable young feminazi tarts in short skirts and huffing mind-altering chemicals with shabby creatures of indeterminate gender. Of course, I don't need to do those things, because I have Jesus to keep me happy instead. But without the light of God or the brief, false light offered by chemical substances, your pointless life must be bleak indeed.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
Reply With Quote
(#31)
Old
Vayhr of the Warhost's Avatar
Vayhr of the Warhost Vayhr of the Warhost is offline
Unruly True Christian™ Maverick
Forum Member
 
Posts: 342
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Vayhr of the Warhost is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.Vayhr of the Warhost is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 01:48 AM

I'M BAAAAAAACK!!!

AND MORE FILLED WITH THE JOY OF JESUS THAN EVER...

GLOOOOOOWWWWWWWW-RRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Now that I have reached 18 seasons and finally graduated from the GODLESS and SECULAR Des Moines ANTI-educational system of negro coddling, feminazing, and fag enabling I can finally enter unto the earthly KINGDOM of GOD
FREEHOLD IOWA!!!

Now, TRUE CHRISTIAN virgins of EXCELLENT STANDARDS!!!! The most VIRILE, MANLY, and MOST BIBLICALLY ACTIONED WARRIOR OF THE MIGHTY WARHOST OF JESUS HAS RETURNED TO TAKE A MATE. I already have a sweet special lady in mind, but since I was only 17 at the time we meet I won't go mentioning names because the secular leftist will probably try and arrest her for some foolish secular law that they might try and claim she committed even though they have no proof for their vicious slander. (I told you that in confidence Mathew with one "T" and that is why I punched your tongue down your throat and then pulled it out the end where the sun don't shine!! And don't think that just because I'm 18 I'm afraid of being charged as an adult!!! You keep your mouth shut!! I'll deny anything you claim I told you because I told you nothing!!! Nothing, you here me?!?! I will put any of you other Lincoln pukes in wheel chairs - permanently - if you go around repeating his lies!! I am a man of GOD. You won't see it coming.)

ANYWAY, True Christian Ladies, if you've got a STRONG back, tough hair, child bearing hips, a solid firm buttocks, and LOADS OF STAMINA (yeah, I'm talking to you)you know where to find me... or at least you will - I'M COMING TO FREEHOLD!!! SHOUT GLORY!!!!

WRAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!
Reply With Quote
(#32)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 01:51 AM



Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#33)
Old
Magikarp Magikarp is offline
hateful Danish communis
Forum Member
 
Posts: 266
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Godless Europistan
Magikarp is fearful, unbelieving, a liar, a whoremonger, and abominable. Has a place in the Lake of Fire secured.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 02:14 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
That's what I'm thinking too.
Reply With Quote
(#34)
Old
tLakota's Avatar
tLakota tLakota is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member
 
Posts: 205
Join Date: Dec 2007
tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.tLakota has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Smile Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 05:44 AM

Is Sister Talitha or Jenny still interested? I'm sure they're meeting the criteria you've set forth. I have to admit though, a picture might help someone decide. But in any case, welcome back to the forums.


Willpower rules the world.
Reply With Quote
(#35)
Old
JennyD's Avatar
JennyD JennyD is offline
Honorary True Christian™
Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 Saved 1 Year Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Lady

 
Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 05:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vayhr of the Warhost View Post
I'M BAAAAAAACK!!!


AND MORE FILLED WITH THE JOY OF JESUS THAN EVER...

GLOOOOOOWWWWWWWW-RRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Now that I have reached 18 seasons and finally graduated from the GODLESS and SECULAR Des Moines ANTI-educational system of negro coddling, feminazing, and fag enabling


WRAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!
Well, congratulations, Mr. Vayhr, on graduating on your curriculum of negro coddling, feminazing, and fag enabling. I hope you realize that all of these activities are sinful in the eyes of the Lord, and that you will enter into Mrs. Betty Bowers' BASH (Baptists Are Saving Homersexurals) program immediately to begin clearing these perverse ideas from your mind, that you can be Saved©.

Oh, and congratulations on reaching legal adulthood, son.


www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

Christian Ladies:
Savor your separation in style at the Monthly Visitor!
Reply With Quote
(#36)
Old
Magikarp Magikarp is offline
hateful Danish communis
Forum Member
 
Posts: 266
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Godless Europistan
Magikarp is fearful, unbelieving, a liar, a whoremonger, and abominable. Has a place in the Lake of Fire secured.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 05:56 AM

Well, I dunno, Shirlee said at the start of the thread that he might be a twinkie-sucking geek and i'm sure she's not the first one who thought that.

But I can't read his DOF file, so I can't really say.
Reply With Quote
(#37)
Old
JennyD's Avatar
JennyD JennyD is offline
Honorary True Christian™
Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 Saved 1 Year Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Lady

 
Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 06:12 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Magikarp View Post
Well, I dunno, Shirlee said at the start of the thread that he might be a twinkie-sucking geek and i'm sure she's not the first one who thought that.

But I can't read his DOF file, so I can't really say.
Well, Ms. Phelps-Roper IS wise in the ways of . . . er, fishwifery

But in this case, I think she's right on target. Mister Dungeons and Dragons needs to spend some quality time with Mrs. Bowers, and also eating food that does NOT come with a creme filling!!


www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

Christian Ladies:
Savor your separation in style at the Monthly Visitor!
Reply With Quote
(#38)
Old
Vayhr of the Warhost's Avatar
Vayhr of the Warhost Vayhr of the Warhost is offline
Unruly True Christian™ Maverick
Forum Member
 
Posts: 342
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Vayhr of the Warhost is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.Vayhr of the Warhost is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 03:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tLakota View Post
Is Sister Talitha or Jenny still interested? I'm sure they're meeting the criteria you've set forth.

NO WAY!!! Jenny does not meet the criteria. She is scrawny, easily bro ken, bony bottomed, lacks SSSTTTAAAMMMIIINNNAAA, and has no child BEARING hips. She has no upper body strength and her breasts amount to nothing more than overzealous mosquito bites at best. I am sure that there is a man out their for her who is into the young prepubescent boy look, but that man is not me. It is my fervent belief that boyishly handsome females like Jenny were put here by GOD to keep faggot pedophiles out of trouble by offering them a Godly alternative to actual young boys.


Quote:
Originally Posted by tLakota View Post
I have to admit though, a picture might help someone decide. But in any case, welcome back to the forums.
I've meet the only person I care about in person already.
Reply With Quote
(#39)
Old
Vayhr of the Warhost's Avatar
Vayhr of the Warhost Vayhr of the Warhost is offline
Unruly True Christian™ Maverick
Forum Member
 
Posts: 342
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Vayhr of the Warhost is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.Vayhr of the Warhost is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 03:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JennyD View Post
Well, congratulations, Mr. Vayhr, on graduating on your curriculum of negro coddling, feminazing, and fag enabling. I hope you realize that all of these activities are sinful in the eyes of the Lord, and that you will enter into Mrs. Betty Bowers' BASH (Baptists Are Saving Homersexurals) program immediately to begin clearing these perverse ideas from your mind, that you can be Saved©.

Oh, and congratulations on reaching legal adulthood, son.
This sexual tension you keep projecting towards me with your negative smart alec posts needs to stop. I'm simply not interested and you need to respect that. I know that in those soft cuddly romantic comedies you watch sexual frustration presented by negative banter between a male and female leads to a romantic relationship, but this is real life, Jenny.

We're both adults here. Grow up.

Keep your head up, kiddo. I'm sure you'll find somebody someday.
Reply With Quote
(#40)
Old
JennyD's Avatar
JennyD JennyD is offline
Honorary True Christian™
Sweet Placid Sister
Forum Member

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 Saved 1 Year Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Lady

 
Posts: 9,562
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Surrounded by hippie vermin
JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.JennyD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: POSSIBLE MATE FOR CHRIST'S WARRIOR!!!! - 04-26-2008, 06:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vayhr of the Warhost View Post
I've meet the only person I care about in person already.
I see, so you're on our Godly forum looking for a harlot to pleasure you when Father Martin isn't around?!

DISGUSTING!



Perhaps Dances without Joy can help ya. I hear she's rather a robust gal, AND a Godless harlot.


www.palibandaily.com - Your Christian News Source
Huckabee/Palin Gingrich 2012 will reclaim America for Christ! PRAISE!

Christian Ladies:
Savor your separation in style at the Monthly Visitor!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
boor, false, masher, molestor, retarded, she-male, wannabe

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved