Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > PRAYER REQUESTS
Reload this Page Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks!
PRAYER REQUESTS Please check regularly

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
Godfly's Avatar
Godfly Godfly is offline
Descended from Rapes
True Christian™

True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Ex-Masturbator Protected by JESUS Real American™ Heaven Bound True Christian™ Christian Love TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 1 Year One Year/1000 posts Tell her once Porn Resistant Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Teabag Patriot Persecuted Punched the most queers Sons of Liberty Super Soaker Baptism Award Persecuted Pro-Life True Republican Ready for the Rapture Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Truck Stop Ministry Member Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Jailed for JESUS Ex-rape victim Anti-sodomy

 
Posts: 1,548
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold Bible Campground and RV Park.
Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-19-2014, 09:55 PM

Thank you Jesus for helping me find my lucky purple socks. I have used those socks to infiltrate the gays so who knows how many souls they have saved. Those socks must carry a powerful blessing as they have saved me from numerous gang rapes.

GLORY! PRAISE HIM!


Leviticus 13:40 And the man whose hair is fallen off his head, he is bald; yet is he clean.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
see_the_light see_the_light is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian Nuts for JESUS! One Year/1000 posts

 
Posts: 1,387
Join Date: Nov 2006
see_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-19-2014, 11:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Godfly View Post
Thank you Jesus for helping me find my lucky purple socks. I have used those socks to infiltrate the gays so who knows how many souls they have saved. Those socks must carry a powerful blessing as they have saved me from numerous gang rapes.

GLORY! PRAISE HIM!
A lucky charm? Beware.

Jeremiah 8:17

For, behold, I will send serpents, cockatrices, among you, which will not be charmed, and they shall bite you, saith the LORD.

PRAISE THE LORD!
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
Felicity's Avatar
Felicity Felicity is offline
As pure and virginal as the driven snow.
True Christian™

Cleanest Kitchen Virgin True Christian™ Protected by JESUS Home Schooled Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Christian Love Real American™ Best Pie Best stoning bucket True Christian Lady One Year/1000 posts Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Public Awareness Medal True Christian Beauty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus

 
Posts: 4,883
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Felicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFelicity has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-19-2014, 11:11 PM

I am so glad you found your socks back!

I was worried about your socks and couldn't sleep for a week.


I Jesus!
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Godfly's Avatar
Godfly Godfly is offline
Descended from Rapes
True Christian™

True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Ex-Masturbator Protected by JESUS Real American™ Heaven Bound True Christian™ Christian Love TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 1 Year One Year/1000 posts Tell her once Porn Resistant Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Teabag Patriot Persecuted Punched the most queers Sons of Liberty Super Soaker Baptism Award Persecuted Pro-Life True Republican Ready for the Rapture Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Truck Stop Ministry Member Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Jailed for JESUS Ex-rape victim Anti-sodomy

 
Posts: 1,548
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold Bible Campground and RV Park.
Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Godfly will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-19-2014, 11:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Felicity View Post
I am so glad you found your socks back!

I was worried about your socks and couldn't sleep for a week.
I should apologize for the accusations I made. Keeping my home up to standard since my wife died would be impossible without your help. But it did make you the most likely suspect.


Leviticus 13:40 And the man whose hair is fallen off his head, he is bald; yet is he clean.
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Johny Joe Hold's Avatar
Johny Joe Hold Johny Joe Hold is online now
Mayor of Freehold
 

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Mayor True Republican Teabag Patriot Ex-liberal Saved 1 Year Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Eats the Most Pork Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Mission to Korea Stamp of Approval Guns ablazin' Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel BFF of Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 5 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Sons of Liberty Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor

 
Posts: 12,169
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: City Hall, Freehold, Iowa
Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Johny Joe Hold will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-20-2014, 03:01 AM

We cannot understand the mind of God. How fortunate it is God saw to it you found your wonder working purple socks.

Each of us who battles homerism has his own technique. You have found a code, purple socks, that lets you in on their most sinful secrets.

God bless your work against homerism, Brother Godfly.


Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is offline
Gushing for Jesus
 

Protected by JESUS Christian Love Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Cleanest Kitchen Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Persecuted Pro-Life Most Obedient Friend of Jesus True Christian Homemaker True Christian Beauty 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College True Republican Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Quiverful Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls Super Soaker Baptism Award 3rd Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts True Christian Lady Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Tomato Staker Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking The Hatchet Child Rearing Award 4th Year Bible College Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion Babysitter Stamp of Approval Home Schooled Trump of GOD Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch The Lord’s Witness Wound The Lord’s Witness Wound Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Anti-sodomy Mama Grizzly Platinum Tither Best stoning bucket 2015 Witch Hunt Award Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Glory Crown of Rejoicing Saved 5 Years BFF of Jesus Gunfest '14 Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts 20,000 posts Crown of Righteousness Flat Earth Anti-abortion GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden Public Awareness Medal

 
Posts: 23,742
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-20-2014, 03:11 AM

Oh PRAISE JESUS!

If this doesn't encourage those seekers sitting on the fence whether or not to believe in God, this should do it!

Our God is an Awesome God! He cares for every single thing we take up to Him!

I am praising Jesus with you right now, Brother Godfly! May His Holy Name be blessed!

\0/


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
WWJDnow's Avatar
WWJDnow WWJDnow is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Christian Love 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Mission to Australia Saved 1 Year Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Porn Resistant Pro-Life Bronze Tither Eats the Most Pork Super Soaker Baptism Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus 2015 Witch Hunt Award Trump of GOD Asked questions later Persecuted Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Stamp of Approval Hands Off BFF of Jesus Polling for Christ Anti-Biden WWJD

 
Posts: 6,765
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry, Redding, CA
WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!WWJDnow will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-20-2014, 03:34 AM

I will joyfully join in your prayer of thanks.

As Jesus said, Seek and ye shall find. This is just one more proof that we're right and those other religions are wrong.


Draft Freehold, Iowa Mayor
Johny Joe Hold
for Vice President in 2024
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
Daisy Mae Johnson's Avatar
Daisy Mae Johnson Daisy Mae Johnson is offline
The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™

Best Pie One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Christian Love Best Pie Long service medal, 2nd class Cleanest Kitchen Saved 5 Years Platinum Tither True Christian Lady Best Pie True Christian Homemaker Real American™ Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ribfest '09 Daisy Home Schooled Best stoning bucket Heaven Bound The Lord’s Witness Wound Protected by JESUS Punched the most queers TC Bravery Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Most Obedient Born again virgin Persecuted Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor In Love With Zeke Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Paula Deen Negro Support Group Touched by Jesus Babysitter Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Pie Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Anti-sodomy Mission to Messico Hands Off Long service medal, 3rd class 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Mama Grizzly Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Crown of Rejoicing BFF of Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Daisy Mae Johnson will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-20-2014, 03:36 AM

See! PROOF prayer works!


SHOUT GLORY!




Tweet me Here
My GODLY Bio Here
Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
Mother Of Seven Mother Of Seven is offline
True Christian™ with a quiverful

Quiverful True Christian™ Heaven Bound Friend of Jesus Hatchet Child Rearing Award Touched by Jesus Cleanest Kitchen Best stoning bucket True Christian Beauty One Year/1000 posts In Love With Zeke True Heterosexual™ TC Bravery

 
Posts: 2,243
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: In the kitchen
Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mother Of Seven will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-20-2014, 04:11 AM

GLORY!
Reply With Quote
(#10)
Old
Mark L. Snyde, PhD's Avatar
Mark L. Snyde, PhD Mark L. Snyde, PhD is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Friend of Jesus True Christian™ Heaven Bound Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Tell her once Porn Resistant Prayer Warrior True Christian Hotrodder Christian Love Touched by Jesus One Year/1000 posts Real American™ TC Bravery Teabag Patriot Flat Earth Sons of Liberty Kirk Cameron Fan Club Persecuted Paula Deen Negro Support Group Truck Stop Ministry Member Early riser Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hands Off

 
Posts: 1,284
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Following The Rules
Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-20-2014, 06:07 AM

What a joyous and glorious day, Brother Godfly!

I once lost my house keys and prayed to Jesus to help me find them, and a couple of hours later I found them in my garage! Jesus is certainly a worker of miracles for His followers!




I Kings 7:23

And he made a moulten Sea, ten cubites from the one brim to the other: it was round all about, & his height was fiue cubits: and a line of thirtie cubites did compasse it round about.

New here? Desiring to be pleasing in the eyes of The Lord and His Followers?

Then do as directed by our esteemed Pastors and head on over to the Introductions subforum and make your first post there, friend. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. Anything else you want to share with us about how Jesus has blessed you is welcomed too.

Are you a hater of God that believes He is a morally bankrupt monster? Read Why, you ask, is God so angry? to see that it is in fact you that is the monster that mercilessly and infinitely torments God.

Stop this relentless torturing of God and accept Jesus today!
Reply With Quote
(#11)
Old
see_the_light see_the_light is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian Nuts for JESUS! One Year/1000 posts

 
Posts: 1,387
Join Date: Nov 2006
see_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-21-2014, 12:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark L. Snyde, PhD View Post
What a joyous and glorious day, Brother Godfly!

I once lost my house keys and prayed to Jesus to help me find them, and a couple of hours later I found them in my garage! Jesus is certainly a worker of miracles for His followers!
That is nothing!

Once I lost my keys and I was absolutely sure that it was at KFC.

Baby JESUS sent them straight to my house, only had to spend the money of the two bullets for the masked coons that JESUS chose as HIS unwilling messengers.

You can't fight JESUS!

PRAISE THE LORD!
Reply With Quote
(#12)
Old
Paul Tarzan's Avatar
Paul Tarzan Paul Tarzan is offline
Unsaved Trash, half-witted false Christian
 

Cherry-picker Perv Fluffy bunny Hellbound Heathen

 
Posts: 93
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Paul Tarzan is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-21-2014, 04:28 AM

Be careful, Godfly..."lucky socks" are attributing to some created object what only God can bring.

God forbid a Christian turns against Him...oh wait, I forgot, this isn't Christianity, it's Churchianity!


#SellFreeholdFeedThePoor
#DownWithChurchianity
#JESUSIsAllYouNeed
Reply With Quote
(#13)
Old
Mark L. Snyde, PhD's Avatar
Mark L. Snyde, PhD Mark L. Snyde, PhD is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Friend of Jesus True Christian™ Heaven Bound Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Tell her once Porn Resistant Prayer Warrior True Christian Hotrodder Christian Love Touched by Jesus One Year/1000 posts Real American™ TC Bravery Teabag Patriot Flat Earth Sons of Liberty Kirk Cameron Fan Club Persecuted Paula Deen Negro Support Group Truck Stop Ministry Member Early riser Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hands Off

 
Posts: 1,284
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Following The Rules
Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.Mark L. Snyde, PhD is veritably a saint destined for a place in Heaven near Jesus' right hand.
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-21-2014, 05:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paul Tarzan View Post
Be careful, Godfly..."lucky socks" are attributing to some created object what only God can bring.

God forbid a Christian turns against Him...oh wait, I forgot, this isn't Christianity, it's Churchianity!
Why would you try to mock Brother Godfly and all of LBC in this joyous time of answered prayers? Does it just get under your collar that God's chosen few are happy? Is this why you are trying to poo-poo us with this word you seem to repeat incessantly like an unholy mantra?




I Kings 7:23

And he made a moulten Sea, ten cubites from the one brim to the other: it was round all about, & his height was fiue cubits: and a line of thirtie cubites did compasse it round about.

New here? Desiring to be pleasing in the eyes of The Lord and His Followers?

Then do as directed by our esteemed Pastors and head on over to the Introductions subforum and make your first post there, friend. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. Anything else you want to share with us about how Jesus has blessed you is welcomed too.

Are you a hater of God that believes He is a morally bankrupt monster? Read Why, you ask, is God so angry? to see that it is in fact you that is the monster that mercilessly and infinitely torments God.

Stop this relentless torturing of God and accept Jesus today!
Reply With Quote
(#14)
Old
ExGay Alex's Avatar
ExGay Alex ExGay Alex is offline
Helping boys become upright model citizens
True Christian™

True Christian™ Saved 1 Year Friend of Jesus Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Ex-Gay Tell her once One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound True Heterosexual™ True Republican Super Soaker Baptism Award Flat Earth Persecuted Porn Resistant Eats the Most Pork Saved 5 Years Punched the most queers Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Anti-sodomy Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 1,293
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Columbus, Ohio
ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!ExGay Alex will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-21-2014, 09:40 AM

I am glad Jesus found your socks for you. Today I prayed that it wouldn't rain, and it didn't! Prayer works!


"Come Unto Me. Put forth thine hand now, and touch all that he hath." (Matthew 19:14, Job 1:11).
Reply With Quote
(#15)
Old
MitzaLizalor's Avatar
MitzaLizalor MitzaLizalor is offline
Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS True Christian Caucasian Ready for the Rapture Heaven Bound Mission to Australia Christian Love Real American™ Friend of Jesus Flat Earth TC Bravery The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking One Year/1000 posts Best stoning bucket True Christian Lady Pro-Life True Scientist™ True Christian™ True Christian Artist True Christian Beauty Most Obedient Batman Shooting Survivor Kangi Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Early riser Nuts for JESUS! Touched by Jesus Color wheel Trumpette Anti-sodomy Hands Off 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 5 Years Stamp of Approval Tagging for Jesus In Love With Zeke BFF of Jesus God's chosen ones Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Grammar Nazi GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Polling for Christ Anti-Biden Midget porn survivor Aardvark Crown of Glory

 
Posts: 14,666
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!MitzaLizalor will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-21-2014, 12:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ExGay Alex View Post
I am glad Jesus found your socks for you. Today I prayed that it wouldn't rain, and it didn't! Prayer works!
That's amazing! It didn't rain here either! I was able to stand in the garden and eat apples. Otherwise I wouldn't have had any dessert and been at increased risk of scurvy, ricketts & osteoporosis.


Reply With Quote
(#16)
Old
Pastor Isaac Peters's Avatar
Pastor Isaac Peters Pastor Isaac Peters is offline
Senior Pastor
Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
Always Biblically correct
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Publisher's Choice True Heterosexual™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Tithing Manager Christian Love Ex-Mary Worshipper Long service medal, 2nd class Senior Pastor Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork Outreach preacher True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Anti-sodomy Hands Off Crown of Glory Probing for Jesus Alternative Facts Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-21-2014, 06:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paul Tarzan View Post
Be careful, Godfly..."lucky socks" are attributing to some created object what only God can bring.

God forbid a Christian turns against Him...oh wait, I forgot, this isn't Christianity, it's Churchianity!
If the Creator chooses to make His blessings manifest through a created object (Numbers 21:7-9), who are you to tell us to disregard Him?

Anyway, it's such a blessing that Jesus found Brother Godfly's purple socks. When I hear about the blessings that the Lord bestows on those who keep His commandments, compared to the troubles that befall the unsaved in lands stricken by famine or tsunami, I know that God is love.


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

Reply With Quote
(#17)
Old
Jimmy-Roy Stewart's Avatar
Jimmy-Roy Stewart Jimmy-Roy Stewart is offline
Tin Tither
True Christian™

Parking Lot Tither True Heterosexual™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus A for Effort Flat Earth True Republican Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award

 
Posts: 234
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: pastors garage
Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-22-2014, 05:41 PM

I lost a pare of socks may be if i tithe some more Jesus will help me find them.
Reply With Quote
(#18)
Old
see_the_light see_the_light is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus True Christian Caucasian Nuts for JESUS! One Year/1000 posts

 
Posts: 1,387
Join Date: Nov 2006
see_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapturesee_the_light has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-22-2014, 06:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy-Roy Stewart View Post
I lost a pare of socks may be if i tithe some more Jesus will help me find them.
Of course HE will, tithe is a most efficient prayer.

PRAISE THE LORD!
Reply With Quote
(#19)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-22-2014, 09:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy-Roy Stewart View Post
I lost a pare of socks may be if i tithe some more Jesus will help me find them.
I saw your boy (the retarded one who got blood all over my private pool) sitting in a ditch out at the township line yesterday, pushing berries up his nose and diddling himself with an old boot sock. That might be one of them.

I swear Jimmy-Roy, I wish you'd learn how to control your brood.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#20)
Old
Jimmy-Roy Stewart's Avatar
Jimmy-Roy Stewart Jimmy-Roy Stewart is offline
Tin Tither
True Christian™

Parking Lot Tither True Heterosexual™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus A for Effort Flat Earth True Republican Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award

 
Posts: 234
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: pastors garage
Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.Jimmy-Roy Stewart has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Join me in a prayer of thanks! I found my lucky socks! - 01-22-2014, 10:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
I saw your boy (the retarded one who got blood all over my private pool) sitting in a ditch out at the township line yesterday, pushing berries up his nose and diddling himself with an old boot sock. That might be one of them.

I swear Jimmy-Roy, I wish you'd learn how to control your brood.
Im' real sorry Pastor Ezekal Sir i guess ill' have to beat him extra hard two night i wish my kids would of turned out better i dont' know why they didnt' i guess i need to tithe even more.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved