Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > MEET CHRISTIAN SINGLES!
Reload this Page How much do you guys think I could sell my daughter for?
MEET CHRISTIAN SINGLES! Who knows? The love of your life might be here! All the single men are GODLY and all the single ladies are virgins...........for the most part.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#521)
Old
Capt. Aaron Portway's Avatar
Capt. Aaron Portway Capt. Aaron Portway is offline
One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
Salvation from Above
God's Favorite Pilot™
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts True Christian™ Ribfest '08 Bronze Tither Saved 1 Year Real American™ Christian Love Heaven Bound TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Mission to Australia Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Mission to Japan Porn Resistant Mission to Las Vegas God's favorite pilot True Republican Special Mission (North Korea) True Christian Provider™ award Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Divorcee Prayer Warrior Anti-sodomy Iceland Mission to Messico Gunfest '07 The Hatchet Child Rearing Award The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Long service medal, 3rd class F1 for God

 
Posts: 6,282
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Flying the Friendly Skies for Jesus!
Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-27-2012, 07:32 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Good Christian Woman View Post
My daughter Naomi just turned 14, and my husband believes it's high time to find her a good, Christian husband.

He'd like at least $700 for her, since she is a True Christian virgin, but he's willing to be flexible with price because, well, let's just say there's a reason I'm choosing not to post her picture.

She's an excellent cook, and she'll have a nice warm cherry pie waiting for you every night after you get home from work. We've taught her submission, so you won't have to worry about obedience. Her cleaning skills are lacking, though, so don't put away that rod just yet.
Praise Jesus, count me in!

I'l tell you what, I'll make it an even thousand sight unseen! If you have an open couple of hours this weekend, we can get a Pastor to make it official!

I really do miss the touch of a True Christian™ wife, it's been far too long.




Quote:
Originally Posted by Vocaloid View Post
you have no right to sell her to begin with! she just turned 14! its her decision to marry or not! this is slavery! how does this make you any different from Joseph Kony?
How dare you call me a spearchucker!




Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
Reply With Quote
(#522)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-27-2012, 07:36 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
Praise Jesus, count me in!

I'l tell you what, I'll make it an even thousand sight unseen! If you have an open couple of hours this weekend, we can get a Pastor to make it official!

I really do miss the touch of a True Christian™ wife, it's been far too long!
Glory! Another Landover wedding! I'd like to volunteer my home for the reception/honeymoon. I know Brother Portway would like to begin working on starting a family right away.


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#523)
Old
David Willts David Willts is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 17
Join Date: Mar 2012
David Willts is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-27-2012, 07:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vocaloid View Post
how does this make you any different from Joseph Kony?
Please there is a huge difference, one is a good Christian that should be commended and the other is a guy trying to sell his daughter.
Reply With Quote
(#524)
Old
Capt. Aaron Portway's Avatar
Capt. Aaron Portway Capt. Aaron Portway is offline
One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
Salvation from Above
God's Favorite Pilot™
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts True Christian™ Ribfest '08 Bronze Tither Saved 1 Year Real American™ Christian Love Heaven Bound TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Mission to Australia Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Mission to Japan Porn Resistant Mission to Las Vegas God's favorite pilot True Republican Special Mission (North Korea) True Christian Provider™ award Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Divorcee Prayer Warrior Anti-sodomy Iceland Mission to Messico Gunfest '07 The Hatchet Child Rearing Award The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Long service medal, 3rd class F1 for God

 
Posts: 6,282
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Flying the Friendly Skies for Jesus!
Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-27-2012, 07:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by David Willts View Post
Please there is a huge difference, one is a good Christian that should be commended and the other is a guy trying to sell his daughter.
Cute. Real cute. Respect your betters friend. Also, Good Christian Woman is a shining example of True Christian™ femininity who is about to become my mother-in-law! She hardly counts as a "guy"!




Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
Reply With Quote
(#525)
Old
Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is offline
Gushing for Jesus
 

Protected by JESUS Christian Love Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Cleanest Kitchen Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Persecuted Pro-Life Most Obedient Friend of Jesus True Christian Homemaker True Christian Beauty 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College True Republican Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Quiverful Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls Super Soaker Baptism Award 3rd Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts True Christian Lady Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Tomato Staker Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking The Hatchet Child Rearing Award 4th Year Bible College Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion Babysitter Stamp of Approval Home Schooled Trump of GOD Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch The Lord’s Witness Wound The Lord’s Witness Wound Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Anti-sodomy Mama Grizzly Platinum Tither Best stoning bucket 2015 Witch Hunt Award Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Glory Crown of Rejoicing Saved 5 Years BFF of Jesus Gunfest '14 Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts 20,000 posts Crown of Righteousness Flat Earth Anti-abortion GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden Public Awareness Medal

 
Posts: 23,729
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-27-2012, 08:34 PM

Oh PRAISE JESUS!

Do you need someone to bake a cake? I don't mean to brag, but the Holy Spirit guides my hand to make cakes that serve as a reminder that a marriage is a covenant between three parties - the groom, the bride, and the LORD.



Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

Reply With Quote
(#526)
Old
Good Christian Woman's Avatar
Good Christian Woman Good Christian Woman is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Cleanest Kitchen Most Obedient Flat Earth Persecuted True Christian Homemaker True Christian Lady Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls True Republican

 
Posts: 345
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: In my prayer closet
Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-28-2012, 07:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vocaltoad View Post
how does this make you any different from Joseph Kony?
Oh stop, you'll make me blush! I appreciate the sentiment, but I don't think I'm quite good enough to be compared to a brave man like Kony.


1 Corinthians 14:34 Shut up and get back in the kitchen!
Reply With Quote
(#527)
Old
Good Christian Woman's Avatar
Good Christian Woman Good Christian Woman is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Cleanest Kitchen Most Obedient Flat Earth Persecuted True Christian Homemaker True Christian Lady Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls True Republican

 
Posts: 345
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: In my prayer closet
Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-28-2012, 07:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
Praise Jesus, count me in!

I'l tell you what, I'll make it an even thousand sight unseen! If you have an open couple of hours this weekend, we can get a Pastor to make it official!

I really do miss the touch of a True Christian™ wife, it's been far too long.
How wonderful! My husband accepts!

You'll all, of course, be invited to the wedding!


1 Corinthians 14:34 Shut up and get back in the kitchen!
Reply With Quote
(#528)
Old
Good Christian Woman's Avatar
Good Christian Woman Good Christian Woman is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Cleanest Kitchen Most Obedient Flat Earth Persecuted True Christian Homemaker True Christian Lady Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls True Republican

 
Posts: 345
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: In my prayer closet
Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-28-2012, 07:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
Glory! Another Landover wedding! I'd like to volunteer my home for the reception/honeymoon. I know Brother Portway would like to begin working on starting a family right away.
How kind of you to volunteer! All our thanks.


1 Corinthians 14:34 Shut up and get back in the kitchen!
Reply With Quote
(#529)
Old
Good Christian Woman's Avatar
Good Christian Woman Good Christian Woman is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Pro-Life Cleanest Kitchen Most Obedient Flat Earth Persecuted True Christian Homemaker True Christian Lady Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls True Republican

 
Posts: 345
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: In my prayer closet
Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.Good Christian Woman has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-28-2012, 07:07 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
Oh PRAISE JESUS!

Do you need someone to bake a cake? I don't mean to brag, but the Holy Spirit guides my hand to make cakes that serve as a reminder that a marriage is a covenant between three parties - the groom, the bride, and the LORD.

Thank you for offering! I'd bake the cake myself, but I'll be far to busy sewing my daughter's dress. I could definitely use your help.


1 Corinthians 14:34 Shut up and get back in the kitchen!
Reply With Quote
(#530)
Old
Capt. Aaron Portway's Avatar
Capt. Aaron Portway Capt. Aaron Portway is offline
One of the Lord's Airborne Rangers
Salvation from Above
God's Favorite Pilot™
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts True Christian™ Ribfest '08 Bronze Tither Saved 1 Year Real American™ Christian Love Heaven Bound TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Mission to Australia Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Mission to Japan Porn Resistant Mission to Las Vegas God's favorite pilot True Republican Special Mission (North Korea) True Christian Provider™ award Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Hatchet Child Rearing Award Divorcee Prayer Warrior Anti-sodomy Iceland Mission to Messico Gunfest '07 The Hatchet Child Rearing Award The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Long service medal, 3rd class F1 for God

 
Posts: 6,282
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Flying the Friendly Skies for Jesus!
Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Capt. Aaron Portway will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 01:24 AM

Well, I'm about to burst with excitement! I just got back from being formally introduced to my future wife!

I say formally introduced because I do remember her from when the 8th grade class from Leviticus Middle School had their field trip/tour of Landover Field last November. Her soon-to-be childbearing hips caught my attention even then.

She is just a dream! She'll make a wonderful wife and mother to my future children.

I can't wait for our wedding (and wedding night )! I talked to the Professor and we will be using his home for a brief reception and the honeymoon!




Winging our Way Across the World for The Lord!



God Bless John Boehner and God Bless the Grand Old Party!



Barack Hussein Obama is not My President!!!
Reply With Quote
(#531)
Old
tyler the earthworm tyler the earthworm is offline
Unsaved trash, teenaged eurotrash hippie
 
 
Posts: 36
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Offending Jesus with every breath
tyler the earthworm is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.tyler the earthworm is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.tyler the earthworm is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.tyler the earthworm is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.tyler the earthworm is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 01:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Capt. A. Portway View Post
Well, I'm about to burst with excitement! I just got back from being formally introduced to my future wife!

I say formally introduced because I do remember her from when the 8th grade class from Leviticus Middle School had their field trip/tour of Landover Field last November. Her soon-to-be childbearing hips caught my attention even then.

She is just a dream! She'll make a wonderful wife and mother to my future children.

I can't wait for our wedding (and wedding night )! I talked to the Professor and we will be using his home for a brief reception and the honeymoon!

what the piffle dud you are a dame pervertthat is all just wrong, first off you have no right to sell someone like a slave, second off your what 40 and she is 14 just so sick i could vomit you are all just piffleed up you say wiccans and all othere religions are but you people are the worst
Reply With Quote
(#532)
Old
Mary Etheldreda's Avatar
Mary Etheldreda Mary Etheldreda is offline
Gushing for Jesus
 

Protected by JESUS Christian Love Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture Cleanest Kitchen Ex-Mary Worshipper True Christian™ Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Persecuted Pro-Life Most Obedient Friend of Jesus True Christian Homemaker True Christian Beauty 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College True Republican Mother of 1 boy or 2.5 girls Quiverful Mother of 2 boys or 5 girls Super Soaker Baptism Award 3rd Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts True Christian Lady Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Tomato Staker Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking The Hatchet Child Rearing Award 4th Year Bible College Paula Deen Negro Support Group TC Bravery Touched by Jesus Heart of compassion Babysitter Stamp of Approval Home Schooled Trump of GOD Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch The Lord’s Witness Wound The Lord’s Witness Wound Donald Trump 2016! Trumpette Anti-sodomy Mama Grizzly Platinum Tither Best stoning bucket 2015 Witch Hunt Award Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Crown of Glory Crown of Rejoicing Saved 5 Years BFF of Jesus Gunfest '14 Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts 20,000 posts Crown of Righteousness Flat Earth Anti-abortion GLORY Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Team Fortress Rebuker Extraordinaire Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden Public Awareness Medal

 
Posts: 23,729
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Mary Etheldreda will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 02:26 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tyler the earthworshiper View Post



what the piffle dud you are a dame pervertthat is all just wrong, first off you have no right to sell someone like a slave, second off your what 40 and she is 14 just so sick i could vomit you are all just piffleed up you say wiccans and all othere religions are but you people are the worst
What are you talking about? He's offering a dowry. That's not only kind, but traditional as well. Besides, what difference does age make? For all we know, Mary was about 13 or 14 when the Holy Spirit impregnated her. It was normal back then because people lived to serve God. Today people live to serve their own lusts. I would be honored for my daughters to have such True Christian™ husbands as Brother Captain Portway.


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

Reply With Quote
(#533)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 02:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tyler the earthworshiper View Post



what the piffle dud you are a dame pervertthat is all just wrong, first off you have no right to sell someone like a slave, second off your what 40 and she is 14 just so sick i could vomit you are all just piffleed up you say wiccans and all othere religions are but you people are the worst
Friend, your lack of respect is only dwarfed by your total ignorance. Brother Portway has the blessing of the parents of the young lady. He is not violating any laws. But just to reassure you, I will let you know that in all True Christian™ marriages where the bride is under the age of sixteen, the marriage license is filed in New Hampshire. Iowa unfortunately has a rather high legal marriage age of sixteen for both men and young ladies.

New Hampshire has marriage laws that are more in line with the Word of God, in that the lower limit for the age of young ladies is thirteen as long as there is consent of the parents of the minor female.


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#534)
Old
Vocaltard's Avatar
Vocaltard Vocaltard is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 32
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Talkin with my friends about Egging your church
Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 03:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tyler the earthworm View Post



what the piffle dude you are a dame pervert that is all just wrong, first off you have no right to sell someone like a slave, second off your what 40 and she is 14 just so sick i could vomit you are all just piffleed up you say wiccans and all othere religions are but you people are the worst
its like i am surrounded by Joseph Konys. if the police find out about this you will all be arrested. and put in the insane asylum.

I totally agree dude! if i had the money i would adopt her and make her go to school. at least i would save her from a living hell!! shouldnt she be in school?! THIS IS AMERICA NOT PAKISTAN!!! WHAT THE PIFFLE IS WRONG WITH YOU RETARDS!! DID U RIDE THE SHORT BUS WHEN U WERE KIDS??? its against the law for you to have a child married to a OLD PEDOPHILE! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOUR DEFECTED BRAINS?!!
Reply With Quote
(#535)
Old
Thinks Design's Avatar
Thinks Design Thinks Design is offline
Unsaved trash false psuedo Christian
 

Panda Caution - Poster is Crazy Bleeding heart liebral Uppity Woman/Enabler Fluffy bunny Cherry-picker Lezbo

 
Posts: 366
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Blewbury
Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 04:03 PM

This is getting weird.

Do you really believe it is okay to sell a person?

ThinksDesign xx
Reply With Quote
(#536)
Old
Vocaltard's Avatar
Vocaltard Vocaltard is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 32
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Talkin with my friends about Egging your church
Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Vocaltard is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 04:21 PM

of course its not okay to sell a person. she is a woman who deserves to choose her husband of her own free will. god i just wish i could save her from the hell her parents have arranged for her. this is just horrible.
Reply With Quote
(#537)
Old
Thinks Design's Avatar
Thinks Design Thinks Design is offline
Unsaved trash false psuedo Christian
 

Panda Caution - Poster is Crazy Bleeding heart liebral Uppity Woman/Enabler Fluffy bunny Cherry-picker Lezbo

 
Posts: 366
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Blewbury
Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Thinks Design is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 04:44 PM

Yeah I've never seen anyone as devoted to the bible as these guys.

Their twisting Gods love.

ThinksDesign
Reply With Quote
(#538)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 04:57 PM

Trying to educate the unsaved is so very difficult. As I stated above, Brother Portway is not breaking any laws at all. On the contrary, he is following both secular and Biblical law to the letter.

Quote:
And if a man entice a maid that is not betrothed, and lie with her, he shall surely endow her to be his wife.

If her father utterly refuse to give her unto him, he shall pay money according to the dowry of virgins.

Exodus 22:16-17
In this case, both of the parents approve of the coming nuptials, even though according to the Bible, her father is the only one with standing in the matter.

Why is it so difficult for non Christians to see that this is a happy occasion? I assume that like most atheists, you lead lives filled with so much anger and pain that seeing even the tiniest amount of joy in the lives of others drives you into a mindless, jealous rage. I pity you and will pray that the Lord fills you with His love. Amen.


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#539)
Old
Yaro Shien Yaro Shien is offline
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
 
Posts: 1
Join Date: Mar 2012
Yaro Shien is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 05:12 PM

This is sicking and I just gonna say that I'm sending this link to the police. Why because I don't believe it's voluntary. On top of that it's against american law to sell american people. You can twist and say it's what god wants but I can a piffleing sure you god will not approve you of this. You piffle head parents are no longer human, and there for you will go hell for payment. And if you piffleing dare complete this transaction, I will personalty hunt you down.
Reply With Quote
(#540)
Old
Roberta's Avatar
Roberta Roberta is offline
Anti La Leche League Organizer
True Christian™

True Christian™ Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Christian Love Real American™ Ready for the Rapture Pro-Life True Christian Lady Virgin True Republican Most Obedient Super Soaker Baptism Award One Year/1000 posts True Christian Beauty Saved 1 Year Best stoning bucket Flat Earth Flat Earth A for Effort Teabag Patriot Hands Off

 
Posts: 1,807
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: VT--the Green Mountain State
Roberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureRoberta has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Is Anyone Willing to Purchase my Daughter? - 03-29-2012, 05:24 PM

Sure thing Brillowax; Interpol has bigger fish to fry. You think it's against American law but not against Pakistani law? That's a bit of a standard double.


Come climb my mountains.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
50 shekels, bride price, child bride, christian women, daughter for sale, exodus, exodus 21, girls are cheap, persecution of christians, pregnant teens, soft cops, teen bride, underage teen sluts, women are property

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved