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Unhappy Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 08:43 PM

I need all your prayers and attention Focused to me


I have recently been diagnosed with a genetic disorder called "Pedophelia"


What this means is i have some Un-controlable Urges towards Pre-Pubescent girls and sometimes even boys.

So Far this hasnt come into play in my life as a Swinger... None of my sexual partners are interested in my desire to bring a young boy or girl into the fold, but i believe one day i may break down and act on my urges.

Please pray for me Brothers and Sisters
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 08:47 PM

Are you studying to be a Catholic priest?



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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 08:52 PM

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Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Are you studying to be a Catholic priest?
My guess was mudslime. Still, same difference, I suppose.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 09:02 PM

Make light of this if you will. But it could be YOUR kids. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 09:21 PM

Me me me. All you depraved homers only ever think about yourselves. I have a feeling you've come to God's Own Forum to mock us and, by association, to mock GOD as well.

Simply put...
Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. (Matt. 5:22)

I shall be praying for you.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 09:30 PM

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Originally Posted by VictoryOS View Post
Me me me. All you depraved homers only ever think about yourselves. I have a feeling you've come to God's Own Forum to mock us and, by association, to mock GOD as well.

Simply put...
Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. (Matt. 5:22)

I shall be praying for you.

aside from my ailments, I am a good Christian and i love god. But i refuse to leave he MADE this forum. I bet if i did some diggin i could find out who did. and also find out what sins they have committed.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 09:33 PM

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Originally Posted by GodGoodFlavor View Post
aside from my ailments, I am a good Christian and i love god. But i refuse to leave he MADE this forum. I bet if i did some diggin i could find out who did. and also find out what sins they have committed.
You're Catholic, not a Christian.



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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 10:48 PM

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You're Catholic, not a Christian.
If i was catholic i would rape your kids. But im a christian, so i just MAY rape your kids.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 11:16 PM

Now, now, no need to panic.

The first thing to do is whack off your tallywhacker. Chop your chunk. Slice your schlong.

There! Problem solved!

And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. Matthew 5:29, 30

One might add, if thy joystick offend thee, cut it off, and cast it into the nearest dumpster: for it is profitable for thee that thy naughty-sausage should perish, and not that thy whole miserable body be cast into Hell where demons will pull your lungs out through your nose with red-hot crochet needles for all eternity.

Yea, verily, merciful is the Lord.

Now straighten up, mister, and don't waste our valuable time.


~~ OEJ
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-14-2007, 11:57 PM

I don't think you've consitered the ramifications of removing ones tallwacker. I'd rather not listen to your opinion until you have educated yourself with the video in this link, sir.

(Vile, inappropriate link unfit for Christian and mixed company removed. Do this again sinner and it will earn you infraction points redeemable for a free trip to hell.)

Last edited by WilliamJenningsBryan; 12-15-2007 at 02:56 AM. Reason: Vile, disgusting link
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 12:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by One-eyed Jack View Post
Now, now, no need to panic.

The first thing to do is whack off your tallywhacker. Chop your chunk. Slice your schlong.

There! Problem solved!

And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. Matthew 5:29, 30

One might add, if thy joystick offend thee, cut it off, and cast it into the nearest dumpster: for it is profitable for thee that thy naughty-sausage should perish, and not that thy whole miserable body be cast into Hell where demons will pull your lungs out through your nose with red-hot crochet needles for all eternity.

Yea, verily, merciful is the Lord.

Now straighten up, mister, and don't waste our valuable time.


~~ OEJ

Do you think speaking retro brings you closer to god? god doesnt care how you type or what language you speak...

are you just tryin to be some kind of elitist? Cuz that implies your look down on people wich also is pride. and thats a sin. Sooooo what makes you high and mighty enough to judge me? Trust me i have had a look around here, and none of you are in any position to judge.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 12:18 AM

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Originally Posted by TheTemplarKnights View Post
I don't think you've consitered the ramifications of removing ones tallwacker. I'd rather not listen to your opinion until you have educated yourself with the video in this link, sir.


Nobody is interested in watching your homer porn. You probably get some sort of perverted delight from thinking about us all clicking on your Devil's link.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 12:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by GodGoodFlavor View Post
Do you think speaking retro brings you closer to god? god doesnt care how you type or what language you speak...

are you just tryin to be some kind of elitist? Cuz that implies your look down on people wich also is pride. and thats a sin. Sooooo what makes you high and mighty enough to judge me? Trust me i have had a look around here, and none of you are in any position to judge.
So making a thread to beg us to pray just for YOU and no one else...that isn't a bit prideful? And how about you reach your little homer pinky over to the shift key every once in a while. You know the finger, the one with the diamond ring on it.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 02:36 AM

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So making a thread to beg us to pray just for YOU and no one else...that isn't a bit prideful?.
No. Infact its the whole purpose of this board, wich you guys created, because you think your in the position to help people. when its apparent you all need serious help yourselves
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 02:48 AM

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Originally Posted by GodGoodFlavor View Post
No. Infact its the whole purpose of this board, wich you guys created, because you think your in the position to help people. when its apparent you all need serious help yourselves
This coming from a homer who attends other peoples' beds more often than he attends Church. You're the one who needs to get right with the Lord, friend. You can mock and ignore the Lord now, but you won't be able to mock and ignore Him for all of Eternity!

11 For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.
12 So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God.


(Romans 14)
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 03:11 AM

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Originally Posted by VictoryOS View Post
This coming from a homer who attends other peoples' beds more often than he attends Church. You're the one who needs to get right with the Lord, friend. You can mock and ignore the Lord now, but you won't be able to mock and ignore Him for all of Eternity!
This hole forum mocks god. The fact that none of you truely practice the teachings of the bible, and completley take it out of context and mis interpret it is a mockery of god....
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 03:17 AM

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Originally Posted by GodGoodFlavor View Post
No. Infact its the whole purpose of this board, wich you guys created, because you think your in the position to help people. when its apparent you all need serious help yourselves
We are just trying to make you see the true ways of the Lord. For some GodGoodFlavor take that chopped off tallywhacker and sauté it in some butter, garlic and shallots. Reduce the juices and flambé it in some cognac, then add some heavy cream and mustard. Season to taste. Bon Appétit.


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brothers, lift your voices, loud your anthems raise.
...and get off my lawn
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 03:18 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by GodGoodFlavor View Post
This hole forum mocks god. The fact that none of you truely practice the teachings of the bible, and completley take it out of context and mis interpret it is a mockery of god....
Please show us where we have taken anything out of context, you filthy vile pervert.

You have yet to even mention the Bible. You are about as Christian as my joo lawyer.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 03:32 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Please show us where we have taken anything out of context, you filthy vile pervert.

You have yet to even mention the Bible. You are about as Christian as my joo lawyer.
i dont mention the bible, i follow it. I treat everyone in a christian mannor and leave nobody out. and i am the pervert? Excuse me but i beleive you are all bigger perverts then anyone.

Your Singles board where u pimp out your VIRGINS, god this send men back 60 years.... Even a lot of your comments and responses go hand in hand with sex... even if thats not the subject matter... Leading me to beleive you are bigger perverts then you complain about others being.

This isnt so much a church as much as it is a Circle Jerk. You people are only united by your prejudices. Ur enabling eachother to think this is what god wants, to divide people, and u only quote from the bible where it serves your purpose.

So no, im not gonna pretend i memorized parts from a book, but part of being a christian is being a human being, and you people are all apes.
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Default Re: Screw these guys, pray for ME - 12-15-2007, 03:41 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by GodGoodFlavor View Post
i dont mention the bible, i follow it. I treat everyone in a christian mannor and leave nobody out. and i am the pervert? Excuse me but i beleive you are all bigger perverts then anyone.

Your Singles board where u pimp out your VIRGINS, god this send men back 60 years.... Even a lot of your comments and responses go hand in hand with sex... even if thats not the subject matter... Leading me to beleive you are bigger perverts then you complain about others being.

This isnt so much a church as much as it is a Circle Jerk. You people are only united by your prejudices. Ur enabling eachother to think this is what god wants, to divide people, and u only quote from the bible where it serves your purpose.

So no, im not gonna pretend i memorized parts from a book, but part of being a christian is being a human being, and you people are all apes.
Raping children is a degenerate sin. So is sodomizing men. No one expects you to memorize anything, but if you call yourself a Christian, then you should at least be remotely familiar with God's expectations. All of them, not just the ones you heard about on Oprah.

You come into our Godly forum and spew hatred and threaten to rape our children, what do you expect in return? Jesus has called you here, but no one is forcing you to stay. Go ahead and have your perverted orgies in defiance of God. But we don't want to hear about it, heathen.

What part of unsaved=unwelcome don't you understand?

1Cor:9-11
I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:Yet not altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world.
But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolator, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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