Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed! |
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-24-2011, 02:13 AM
With all the bad examples set by Obama, Oprah and all those other people who aren't as white as Jesus, people are losing touch with the reality of the Holy Bible. It is time to fix this and go back to the ways taught to us by Jesus Christ Himself!
#1 You are out of food.
What would Obama/Oprah do: Steal food.
What would a fluffy bunny false Christian do: Buy food.
What should a True Christian™ do instead: Pray for food!
Why? Matthew 21:22 "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."
#2 Your kids are annoying.
Obama/Oprah: Give them drugs.
False Christian: Ask them to stop.
True Christian™: Hit them until they bleed!
Why? Proverbs 23:13-14 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."
#3 You catch your son watching porn.
Obama/Oprah: Do a live porn show for him.
False Christian: Throw away the porn.
True Christian™: Poke out his eyes!
Why? Mark 9:47 "And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire"
#4 You catch your daughter having sex.
Obama/Oprah: Join them and have incest.
False Christian: Tell them to stop.
True Christian™: Burn down your house with your daughter still in it!
Why? Genesis 38:24 "And it came to pass about three months after, that it was told Judah, saying, Tamar thy daughter in law hath played the harlot; and also, behold, she is with child by whoredom. And Judah said, Bring her forth, and let her be burnt."
#5 You get sick.
Obama/Oprah: Slaughter and burn a virgin.
False Christian: Go to a doctor.
True Christian™: Suffer and die!
Why? Romans 5:12 "Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned"
#6 Your wife brings home a dog and a cat.
Obama/Oprah: Have sex with them.
False Christian: Welcome them and feed them.
True Christian™: Kill either the dog or the cat!
Why? Leviticus 19:19 "Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind"
#7 You get a visitor from out of town.
Obama/Oprah: Have an orgy.
False Christian: Invite them in and be nice to them.
True Christian™: Kick them out immediately because all outsiders are evil!
Why? 2nd Timothy 3:8 "Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith."
#8 A women talks to you.
Obama/Oprah: Rape her.
False Christian: Engage in conversation with the woman.
True Christian™: Tell her to shut up immediately!
Why? 1st Timothy 2:11-12 "Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence."
#9 You catch your son masturbating.
Obama/Oprah: Start masturbating as well.
False Christian: Ask him to stop.
True Christian™: Cut off his hand!
Why? Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched"
#10 Someone makes a mistake.
Obama/Oprah: Make an even bigger mistake.
False Christian: Forgive them and move on.
True Christian™: Punish them severely!
Why? John 7:24 "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment." 2nd Timothy 4:1-2 "I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering and doctrine."
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
Last edited by Cranky Old Man; 01-24-2011 at 02:16 PM.
Reason: Typo
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#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
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Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-24-2011, 03:45 AM
Cranky the world will be better off when everyone is a True Christian. Its a lot less complicated.
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Forum Member
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Posts: 233
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Location: Trying to get to Freehold
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-24-2011, 04:20 AM
Superb work as always Brother Cranky - one question though.
With regard to point four - If the man in question might be raping your daughter would it be prudent to wait until he had finished to see if he was intending to pay his 50 shekels of silver and take the daughter off your hands?
Does it not tell us in Deuteronomy 22:28-29 If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.
Obviously if he was not forthcoming with the money then lock them both in the house and burning it to the ground would be the correct course of action
I would appreciate your thoughts on this.
YIC
If you don't believe it then go read your bible - you DON"T have a bible??? Then prepare for eternal damnation sinner.
“If ye love me, keep my commandments.” – John 14:15
"Vengeance Is Mine, I Will Repay Sayeth The Lord" - Romans 12:19
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,438
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-24-2011, 09:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by God's Flaming Sword
I would appreciate your thoughts on this.
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The Holy Bible has several strategies for when your daughter gets raped. But since it is just a worthless daughter we are talking about here, I would advice the burning her approach. If it would have been a son I would go for the forced marriage option.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 395
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: On a Divine Quest in Dunghole Denmarkistan
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-24-2011, 11:31 AM
Great list, brother Cranky. Whenever some idiotic socialist points out that we should send money and food down to the country of Africa I remind them of point no. 1 and explain them that we should send down Bibles instead.
Quote:
#1 You are out of food.
What would Obama/Oprah do: Steal food.
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Quote:
What would a fluffy bunny false Christian do: Buy food.
What should a True Christian™ do instead: Pray for food!
Why? Matthew 21:22 "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."
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To the atheists:
To the false christians:
Feel like pissing off God? Perhaps this will change your mind:
Hosea 13:16 Samaria shall become desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up.
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Posts: 39
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: The frontline of The Holy War
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-24-2011, 05:21 PM
Praise this list, Brother Cranky, praise every word it says!
#11. Your True Christian™ son punches a homer.
Obama/Oprah: Punish the kid and have sex with the homer to make up with him
False Christian: Tell the kid everyone is equal.
True Christian™: Praise the kid, go out and beat homers up together!
Why? Leviticus 20:13 ''If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.''
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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Posts: 33
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-25-2011, 03:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
With all the bad examples set by Obama, Oprah and all those other people who aren't as white as Jesus, people are losing touch with the reality of the Holy Bible. It is time to fix this and go back to the ways taught to us by Jesus Christ Himself!
#1 You are out of food.
What would Obama/Oprah do: Steal food.
What would a fluffy bunny false Christian do: Buy food.
What should a True Christian™ do instead: Pray for food!
Why? Matthew 21:22 "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."
#2 Your kids are annoying.
Obama/Oprah: Give them drugs.
False Christian: Ask them to stop.
True Christian™: Hit them until they bleed!
Why? Proverbs 23:13-14 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."
#3 You catch your son watching porn.
Obama/Oprah: Do a live porn show for him.
False Christian: Throw away the porn.
True Christian™: Poke out his eyes!
Why? Mark 9:47 "And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire"
#4 You catch your daughter having sex.
Obama/Oprah: Join them and have incest.
False Christian: Tell them to stop.
True Christian™: Burn down your house with your daughter still in it!
Why? Genesis 38:24 "And it came to pass about three months after, that it was told Judah, saying, Tamar thy daughter in law hath played the harlot; and also, behold, she is with child by whoredom. And Judah said, Bring her forth, and let her be burnt."
#5 You get sick.
Obama/Oprah: Slaughter and burn a virgin.
False Christian: Go to a doctor.
True Christian™: Suffer and die!
Why? Romans 5:12 "Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned"
#6 Your wife brings home a dog and a cat.
Obama/Oprah: Have sex with them.
False Christian: Welcome them and feed them.
True Christian™: Kill either the dog or the cat!
Why? Leviticus 19:19 "Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind"
#7 You get a visitor from out of town.
Obama/Oprah: Have an orgy.
False Christian: Invite them in and be nice to them.
True Christian™: Kick them out immediately because all outsiders are evil!
Why? 2nd Timothy 3:8 "Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith."
#8 A women talks to you.
Obama/Oprah: Rape her.
False Christian: Engage in conversation with the woman.
True Christian™: Tell her to shut up immediately!
Why? 1st Timothy 2:11-12 "Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence."
#9 You catch your son masturbating.
Obama/Oprah: Start masturbating as well.
False Christian: Ask him to stop.
True Christian™: Cut off his hand!
Why? Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched"
#10 Someone makes a mistake.
Obama/Oprah: Make an even bigger mistake.
False Christian: Forgive them and move on.
True Christian™: Punish them severely!
Why? John 7:24 "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment." 2nd Timothy 4:1-2 "I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering and doctrine."
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have you tryed these on anyone yet or are they just meaningless words?
and if so what did the police have to say about it?
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,438
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-25-2011, 11:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by dominoes delivers
have you tryed these on anyone yet or are they just meaningless words?
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Of course not. There is not a single word in God's Holy Bible that is meaningless!
Quote:
and if so what did the police have to say about it?
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In Freehold the police only employs True Christians™ so they know there is nothing more important than God and His Holy Bible!
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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America's Most Fair and Balanced Judge
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,611
Join Date: Jun 2009
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-25-2011, 12:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
In Freehold the police only employs True Christians™ so they know there is nothing more important than God and His Holy Bible!
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And in my court, the sworn words of a Freehold police officer are good enough for me.
The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court
"Credo elvem etiam vivere"
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-25-2011, 12:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
#9 You catch your son masturbating.
Obama/Oprah: Start masturbating as well.
False Christian: Ask him to stop.
True Christian™: Cut off his hand!
Why? Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched"
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This happened to me when I turned 19 and my pa started M'ing coz he been a wishy washy faggit Obama voting liberal. I often wonder if it has anything to do with how I went astray. Who knows how awesome my life could have been now if I was raised by a Bible believing True Christian family. I could have even been a Pastor.
Upon the wicked he shall rain snares, fire and brimstone, and an horrible tempest: this shall be the portion of their cup. (Psalm 11:6)
GOD HATES FAGS
Romans 1:18-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:8-11, Jude 7, etc
DEATH PENALTY FOR FAGS
WHITE AND PROUD
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Confirmed Enemy of God
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-25-2011, 11:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
With all the bad examples set by Obama, Oprah and all those other people who aren't as white as Jesus, people are losing touch with the reality of the Holy Bible. It is time to fix this and go back to the ways taught to us by Jesus Christ Himself!
#1 You are out of food.
What would Obama/Oprah do: Steal food.
What would a fluffy bunny false Christian do: Buy food.
What should a True Christian™ do instead: Pray for food!
Why? Matthew 21:22 "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."
#2 Your kids are annoying.
Obama/Oprah: Give them drugs.
False Christian: Ask them to stop.
True Christian™: Hit them until they bleed!
Why? Proverbs 23:13-14 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."
#3 You catch your son watching porn.
Obama/Oprah: Do a live porn show for him.
False Christian: Throw away the porn.
True Christian™: Poke out his eyes!
Why? Mark 9:47 "And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire"
#4 You catch your daughter having sex.
Obama/Oprah: Join them and have incest.
False Christian: Tell them to stop.
True Christian™: Burn down your house with your daughter still in it!
Why? Genesis 38:24 "And it came to pass about three months after, that it was told Judah, saying, Tamar thy daughter in law hath played the harlot; and also, behold, she is with child by whoredom. And Judah said, Bring her forth, and let her be burnt."
#5 You get sick.
Obama/Oprah: Slaughter and burn a virgin.
False Christian: Go to a doctor.
True Christian™: Suffer and die!
Why? Romans 5:12 "Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned"
#6 Your wife brings home a dog and a cat.
Obama/Oprah: Have sex with them.
False Christian: Welcome them and feed them.
True Christian™: Kill either the dog or the cat!
Why? Leviticus 19:19 "Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind"
#7 You get a visitor from out of town.
Obama/Oprah: Have an orgy.
False Christian: Invite them in and be nice to them.
True Christian™: Kick them out immediately because all outsiders are evil!
Why? 2nd Timothy 3:8 "Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith."
#8 A women talks to you.
Obama/Oprah: Rape her.
False Christian: Engage in conversation with the woman.
True Christian™: Tell her to shut up immediately!
Why? 1st Timothy 2:11-12 "Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence."
#9 You catch your son masturbating.
Obama/Oprah: Start masturbating as well.
False Christian: Ask him to stop.
True Christian™: Cut off his hand!
Why? Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched"
#10 Someone makes a mistake.
Obama/Oprah: Make an even bigger mistake.
False Christian: Forgive them and move on.
True Christian™: Punish them severely!
Why? John 7:24 "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment." 2nd Timothy 4:1-2 "I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering and doctrine."
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The above is all <vile profanity removed>! Read on and realize the truth of the words that follow:
#1 Satan represents vital existence, instead of spiritual pipe dreams!
If you want food, go get it, instead of praying to something that doesn't exist, hoping for it to happen.
#2 Children shall be praised for their innocense and pure thougts.
#3 If you're not comfortable with that, then encourage him to go out and get some real pussy instead!
#4 She's expressing lust. Let her be and give her the privacy she deserve!
#5 Get better and continue to enjoy you life to the fullest!
#6 Do not kill non-human animals unless you are attacked or for your food.
#7 If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy. If not, then be nice to him and show him some hospitality.
#8 When walking in open territory, bother no one. If someone bothers you, ask the person to stop. If the person does not stop, destroy the person.
Make no difference in male or female.
#9 It's completely natural, and everyone does it sometime. If you're going to cut his hand off, then begin with cutting off you own!
#10 Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.
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Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
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Posts: 14,455
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-25-2011, 11:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shemhamforash
...#10 Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.
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How do you not see the irony in your own comment?
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 5
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-26-2011, 12:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much
How do you not see the irony in your own comment?
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That depends. Taking in consideration that I made this accont only to give a good answear to that post, so no, there's no irony in it. This is just entertaining
And here's another entertaining thing: http://sprengmeister.org/nsfw/jesusishitler/
Hail Satan!
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Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
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Posts: 14,455
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: The other end of the internet
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
01-26-2011, 12:16 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shemhamforash
That depends. Taking in consideration that I made this accont only to give a good answear to that post, so no, there's no irony in it....
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No, it doesn't depend on that. What you are doing is complaining about that "to which you need not subject yourself", while you are telling someone else NOT TO DO that.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 1
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
02-27-2011, 04:27 AM
Dear True Christians,
I am brought to tears by the loathing you place upon others. The Lord Jesus Christ loves everyone. Honestly, a man's religion is based mostly on how he was raised (This is why many Indians are Hindu, Middle Easterns are Muslims, and Westerners are Christian).
God will allow the pure of heart into His Kingdom, and cast the wicked into Hell for eternity. Your blind hatred and cult-like processions are a mockery of real Christians.
Real Christians have benevolence towards all. They do not hit their wives or sell their daughter's virginity. They do not physically or verbally assault homosexuals. They forgive, as would Jesus Christ, God's only Son, our Lord.
I will pray to God every night in hope that you will see the wicked ways of Landover Baptist Church. If you want information on the REAL Christianity (and not a false one, which endorses HATE and VIOLENCE), feel free to reach me via email at [personal e-mail address removed].
In God's HOLY Name,
4.55 Billion
P.S. The user name is IRONIC
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 3
Join Date: Mar 2011
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
03-02-2011, 12:56 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
With all the bad examples set by Obama, Oprah and all those other people who aren't as white as Jesus, people are losing touch with the reality of the Holy Bible. It is time to fix this and go back to the ways taught to us by Jesus Christ Himself!
#1 You are out of food.
What would Obama/Oprah do: Steal food.
What would a fluffy bunny false Christian do: Buy food.
What should a True Christian™ do instead: Pray for food!
Why? Matthew 21:22 "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."
#2 Your kids are annoying.
Obama/Oprah: Give them drugs.
False Christian: Ask them to stop.
True Christian™: Hit them until they bleed!
Why? Proverbs 23:13-14 "Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell."
#3 You catch your son watching porn.
Obama/Oprah: Do a live porn show for him.
False Christian: Throw away the porn.
True Christian™: Poke out his eyes!
Why? Mark 9:47 "And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire"
#4 You catch your daughter having sex.
Obama/Oprah: Join them and have incest.
False Christian: Tell them to stop.
True Christian™: Burn down your house with your daughter still in it!
Why? Genesis 38:24 "And it came to pass about three months after, that it was told Judah, saying, Tamar thy daughter in law hath played the harlot; and also, behold, she is with child by whoredom. And Judah said, Bring her forth, and let her be burnt."
#5 You get sick.
Obama/Oprah: Slaughter and burn a virgin.
False Christian: Go to a doctor.
True Christian™: Suffer and die!
Why? Romans 5:12 "Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned"
#6 Your wife brings home a dog and a cat.
Obama/Oprah: Have sex with them.
False Christian: Welcome them and feed them.
True Christian™: Kill either the dog or the cat!
Why? Leviticus 19:19 "Thou shalt not let thy cattle gender with a diverse kind"
#7 You get a visitor from out of town.
Obama/Oprah: Have an orgy.
False Christian: Invite them in and be nice to them.
True Christian™: Kick them out immediately because all outsiders are evil!
Why? 2nd Timothy 3:8 "Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith."
#8 A women talks to you.
Obama/Oprah: Rape her.
False Christian: Engage in conversation with the woman.
True Christian™: Tell her to shut up immediately!
Why? 1st Timothy 2:11-12 "Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence."
#9 You catch your son masturbating.
Obama/Oprah: Start masturbating as well.
False Christian: Ask him to stop.
True Christian™: Cut off his hand!
Why? Mark 9:43 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the firethat never shall be quenched"
#10 Someone makes a mistake.
Obama/Oprah: Make an even bigger mistake.
False Christian: Forgive them and move on.
True Christian™: Punish them severely!
Why? John 7:24 "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment." 2nd Timothy 4:1-2 "I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long suffering and doctrine."
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Sounds like Sharia law to me.
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Pastor of Praise and Worship A True Christian™ Straight Shooter
True Christian™
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Posts: 3,891
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Being led by the Spirit.
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
03-02-2011, 01:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by 12bb1bb
Sounds like Sharia law to me.
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I can assure you it is all perfectly sourced from the Christian Bible.
Praise and worship with Pastor Will. Services at 9 a.m., 11 a.m. and 6 p.m.
Contact me. pastorwillsampson at gmail.com
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 3
Join Date: Mar 2011
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
03-02-2011, 01:09 AM
Maybe in a wickedly and sickly warped interpretation of the Christian bible.
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Outdoorsman, Hunter, Fisherman, Husband, True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,565
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Freehold
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
03-02-2011, 01:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by 12bb1bb
Maybe in a wickedly and sickly warped interpretation of the Christian bible.
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How exactly have we misinterpreted the Bible?
I have a gut feeling that you're just another liberal femnazi who can't keep your nose out of men's business.
Get back to your mending woman
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 5
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: spitting in Christ's loving face
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Re: Solving problems the Christian way! (Not for women and gays.) -
09-22-2012, 01:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Seth Campbell
How exactly have we misinterpreted the Bible?
I have a gut feeling that you're just another liberal femnazi who can't keep your nose out of men's business.
Get back to your mending woman
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Living in a mainly Christian country, I have gotten to know many Christians. Not one, not two, not four hundred and three, but zero (0) of them will agree with any one (1) of these statements.
Now, I'm an atheist so I know diddly squat about your book, but I'm pretty sure whoever wrote it didn't intend to hit their children until they bleed. Or maybe they did, and all of their families stopped because they had no children left alive, and all the people with half a brain lived. Hey look: Natural selection. I guess Darwin was right after all.
I have come to a forum of a extremist, racist, sexist, homophobic people, and I wish to leave now. Your inability to accept other ideas other than your own or even coexist with them will ensure the banning of this account.
Go ahead.
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