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The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

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TheDiplomat TheDiplomat is offline
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Default Introduction - 11-22-2017, 04:50 AM

Hi,
I'm an Internet Diplomat.
What's an Internet Diplomat?
Well, I and my group of close friends are all Internet Diplomats.
Basically we trawl the internet for problems that need solving, and people that need help with something, we've seen most issues repeated over and over, things like: Paedophilia(Which we dealt with, the man is now into people his own age), Segregation on forums, multiple cases of Anti-Donald Trump stuff, and lots more things.
I'm just one of many, and we came to this forum as we saw that this is a safe haven for us, a place to come to if we need to.
So please, feel free to ask if you need a problem solved, I'll try my best to solve it.


Ciao all!


I trawl the internet for things to solve, it's my thing, and if you disagree with me, that's okay, I'm sure we can come to a solution for everything eventually.
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Elmer G. White's Avatar
Elmer G. White Elmer G. White is offline
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Jesus Re: Introduction - 11-22-2017, 05:16 AM

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Originally Posted by TheDiplomat View Post
So please, feel free to ask if you need a problem solved, I'll try my best to solve it.
Dear Sinner,

Can you solve the most urgent problem on Earth: Separation from God? Jesus can.

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

If Jesus can solve it 100% (if you just ask Him sincerely), are you really necessary?


Yours in Christ,

Elmer


2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.



PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
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CarlHudson CarlHudson is offline
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Default Re: Introduction - 11-22-2017, 10:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elmer G. White View Post
Dear Sinner,

Can you solve the most urgent problem on Earth: Separation from God? Jesus can.

Romans 6:23
For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

If Jesus can solve it 100% (if you just ask Him sincerely), are you really necessary?


Yours in Christ,

Elmer
Amen to that!
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Faith_Machine Faith_Machine is offline
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Default Re: Introduction - 11-23-2017, 10:47 AM

That was an odd introduction. Tell us, Diplomat, what church do you attend?


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Basilissa Basilissa is offline
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Bible Re: Introduction - 11-23-2017, 03:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDiplomat View Post
So please, feel free to ask if you need a problem solved, I'll try my best to solve it.
I suspect that the problem is that you have not read the Holy Bible. You can solve it very easily by reading it.


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Brother Gonzalez Brother Gonzalez is offline
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Default Re: Introduction - 11-23-2017, 04:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDiplomat View Post
Hi,

So please, feel free to ask if you need a problem solved, I'll try my best to solve it.


Ciao all!
You came to the wrong place. True Christians do not have any problem, not now not in the afterlife. Is the best thing of being part of the chosen flock.


1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.
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