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Anvil of the Antipodes
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,269
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: policing mockery of the free internets
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Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-28-2007, 09:50 PM
I refuse to believe that dinosaur was coloured bottle green. Surely telling kids that it was coloured more like elephant grey, or crocodile olive drab is far more accurate. And why isnt Jesus using a saddle?
The devil, whose business is to pervert the truth, mimics the exact circumstance of the Divine Sacraments. He baptises his believers and promises forgiveness of sins...he celebrates the oblation of bread, and brings in the symbol of the resurrection. Let us therefore acknowledge the craftiness of the devil, who copied certain things of those that be divine." Tertullian (155-222 AD) from The Prescription Against Heretics' Ch XL
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,840
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Nice house on Nob Hill
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-29-2007, 01:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Guy
And why isnt Jesus using a saddle?
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Because he's Jesus, and he's perfect, and he won't fall
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...
1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...
Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...
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International JOO and fellow-travelling Communiss.
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
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Posts: 831
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Dis.
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-29-2007, 06:32 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by minister noddy
Because he's Jesus, and he's perfect, and he won't fall
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Damn right, he doesn't need a Saddle. Have some faith.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,198
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Baton Rouge, Louisiana
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-29-2007, 11:53 PM
I appreciate you're trying to praise our Lord, Guy, but I don't like that picture. The bible didn't say Jesus rode on dinosaurs, therefore Jesus didn't ride on dinosaurs.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,198
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Baton Rouge, Louisiana
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-30-2007, 12:02 AM
Although I do beg pardon for correcting a man, however, I thought it seemed appropriate.
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International JOO and fellow-travelling Communiss.
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
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Posts: 831
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Dis.
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-30-2007, 06:37 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss Maisie
I appreciate you're trying to praise our Lord, Guy, but I don't like that picture. The bible didn't say Jesus rode on dinosaurs, therefore Jesus didn't ride on dinosaurs.
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So? He's Jesus, he can ride dinosaurs if he wants.
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-30-2007, 05:34 PM
I don't see why JESUS didn't ride one. He can ride anything he wants.
GLORY!
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True Christian™ Entrepreneur
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,695
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Leviticus Landing Gated Community, Freehold IA
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-30-2007, 09:43 PM
Here is how I imagine Jesus getting to work in the morning.
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-30-2007, 09:57 PM
He obviously raised that little Dino from an Egg.
This really puts those Evil-utionists in their place
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Glue Huffer claims to be an elderly Nazi
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 666
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Unknown
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-30-2007, 10:41 PM
Dinos and Jesus at the same time? How???
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 01:40 AM
Considering that you believe that jesus existed about 2000 years ago and dinosaurs died out millions of years ago, and if you don't believe the fossil evidence, absolutely no historical records mention dinosaurs around the year zero BCE, and seeing as you believe in the bible literally, even it doesn't mention jeebuz riding dinos.
It clearly mentions in the bible that the biblical jesus rode asses.
So there.
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 02:28 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Considering that you believe that jesus existed about 2000 years ago and dinosaurs died out millions of years ago, and if you don't believe the fossil evidence, absolutely no historical records mention dinosaurs around the year zero BCE, and seeing as you believe in the bible literally, even it doesn't mention jeebuz riding dinos.
It clearly mentions in the bible that the biblical jesus rode asses.
So there.
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Why oh WHY do you have to try and ruin EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!
JESUS can ride whatever HE damn well FEELS like!!!!!
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 02:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Considering that you believe that jesus existed about 2000 years ago and dinosaurs died out millions of years ago, and if you don't believe the fossil evidence, absolutely no historical records mention dinosaurs around the year zero BCE, and seeing as you believe in the bible literally, even it doesn't mention jeebuz riding dinos.
It clearly mentions in the bible that the biblical jesus rode asses.
So there.
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Trinity Rachael, Jesus has always been around. He is the alpha and the omega as The Bible says. He was raising baby velocoraptures long before your ancestresses were roasting children.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 03:27 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
Why oh WHY do you have to try and ruin EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!
JESUS can ride whatever HE damn well FEELS like!!!!!
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Yes, and if you believe the bible, he felt like riding asses.
Quote:
Trinity Rachael, Jesus has always been around. He is the alpha and the omega as The Bible says. He was raising baby velocoraptures velociraptors long before your ancestresses were roasting children.
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Could you quote me chapter and verse on that?
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
Last edited by Rachael Van Helsing; 07-31-2007 at 03:28 AM.
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International JOO and fellow-travelling Communiss.
Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
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Posts: 831
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 08:56 AM
Impossibility aside, you have to admit seeing Jesus ride a Velociraptor would be pretty awesome. That or a Tyrannosaurus. Or pretty much any dinosaur for that matter. Except a Compsognathus...they're too small to ride.
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 10:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
Could you quote me chapter and verse on that?
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Have you noticed how the Bible contains virtually no information at all between Jesus overturning the moneychangers' table as a child and going into the desert as an adult? That's an awful lot of time for Him to spend riding dinosaurs. In fact, I'd say the really implausible thing would be if He went that many years without ever getting the urge to hop on a velociraptor's back.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Glue Huffer claims to be an elderly Nazi
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 666
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Unknown
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 10:19 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
JESUS can ride whatever HE damn well FEELS like!!!!!
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And that doesn't make it true.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 04:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance
Have you noticed how the Bible contains virtually no information at all between Jesus overturning the moneychangers' table as a child and going into the desert as an adult? That's an awful lot of time for Him to spend riding dinosaurs. In fact, I'd say the really implausible thing would be if He went that many years without ever getting the urge to hop on a velociraptor's back.
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I've heard a lot of speculation about those years of Christ's life but dino-wranging in some ranch off in the Jordanian desert fits in nicely.
For those of you like Rachael who demand to know why Jesus and dinosaurs can be contemporaries it has long been established that dragons were the ancients word for dinosaur and there are several accounts of Romans encountering dragons about Jesus’ life time.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Deaconess Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,215
Join Date: Jan 1970
Location: God's Own America
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 06:40 PM
Of course, what we do know about the Fossils of these creatures was that they were actually planted in the rock by God just to fool Evil-lutionists and test the Faith of the not-so True Christians.
Looks like he fooled them good and proper
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Apostle of the North
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Posts: 11,869
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: On a mission to bring Christianity to the North
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Re: Gross Misinformation about Dinosaurs -
07-31-2007, 08:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Talitha
Of course, what we do know about the Fossils of these creatures was that they were actually planted in the rock by God just to fool Evil-lutionists and test the Faith of the not-so True Christians.
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I thought they were planted by SATAN?
But maybe you meant that God ALLOWED Satan to plant the fossils in order to test the faith of less-than-true-Christians?
1st Corinthians 15:16 For if the dead rise not, then is not Christ raised:
1st Corinthians 15:17 And if Christ be not raised, your faith is vain; ye are yet in your sins.
1st Corinthians 15:18 Then they also which are fallen asleep in Christ are perished.
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