Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > The introduction forum
Reload this Page Please allow me to reintroduce myself
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
JohnnyTightLips JohnnyTightLips is offline
Unsaved trash, lying sodomite
 

Cathlick Perv

 
Posts: 36
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: in bed with my fag boyfriend
JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 06:08 AM

hello there! i've already made an intro post but i believe many people misunderstood me and a few other posts on here. just wanted to start fresh.

first of all i am bi but not by choice. my gay dads forced me to be gay and now i'm it's like i'm addicted to it. i try not to be but gayness is like a disease. i have since cut my Satanist dads out of my life completely and am trying to be a True Christian.

i try to avoid the sin of homersexuality and sodomy at all times but it is hard. i find myself performing gay acts with other men and trannies many times a week as well as watching porn and having dirty thoughts.

i understand this is an abomination and i am unsaved trash. i am begging the other members of this Church, as well as God Himself, for forgiveness and to help me in my time of need.

for the sake of my eternal soul, i am on my knees in front of you all begging you for help. please open up your hearts and let your forgiveness spray out on to me!
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Witch Hammer's Avatar
Witch Hammer Witch Hammer is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

2010 Witch Hunt Award One Year/1000 posts 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Christian Provider™ award Pro-Life True Christian™ Friend of Jesus Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Porn Resistant Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Pro-Life True Republican Saved 5 Years Tell her once Christian Love The Lord’s Witness Wound Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Flat Earth Persecuted Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Punched the most queers Eats the Most Pork Kirk Cameron Fan Club Mission to Korea Uber Angels Driver Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016!

 
Posts: 1,716
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In the midst of His Will®
Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Cool Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 06:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyTightLips View Post
hello there! i've already made an intro post but i believe many people misunderstood me and a few other posts on here. just wanted to start fresh.

first of all i am bi but not by choice. my gay dads forced me to be gay and now i'm it's like i'm addicted to it. i try not to be but gayness is like a disease. i have since cut my Satanist dads out of my life completely and am trying to be a True Christian.

i try to avoid the sin of homersexuality and sodomy at all times but it is hard. i find myself performing gay acts with other men and trannies many times a week as well as watching porn and having dirty thoughts.

i understand this is an abomination and i am unsaved trash. i am begging the other members of this Church, as well as God Himself, for forgiveness and to help me in my time of need.

for the sake of my eternal soul, i am on my knees in front of you all begging you for help. please open up your hearts and let your forgiveness spray out on to me!
You didn't mention Jesus even once in that post, scumbag! You should be brown-nosing The Lamb™ first and foremost...when He has cleansed you of your sin, then you will have our approval.
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
Marko Loimaan-Aho's Avatar
Marko Loimaan-Aho Marko Loimaan-Aho is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Touched by Jesus Christian Love

 
Posts: 708
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Pajala, Sweden
Marko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMarko Loimaan-Aho has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 08:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyTightLips View Post
hello there! i've already made an intro post but i believe many people misunderstood me and a few other posts on here. just wanted to start fresh.

first of all i am bi but not by choice. my gay dads forced me to be gay and now i'm it's like i'm addicted to it. i try not to be but gayness is like a disease. i have since cut my Satanist dads out of my life completely and am trying to be a True Christian.

i try to avoid the sin of homersexuality and sodomy at all times but it is hard. i find myself performing gay acts with other men and trannies many times a week as well as watching porn and having dirty thoughts.

i understand this is an abomination and i am unsaved trash. i am begging the other members of this Church, as well as God Himself, for forgiveness and to help me in my time of need.

for the sake of my eternal soul, i am on my knees in front of you all begging you for help. please open up your hearts and let your forgiveness spray out on to me!
There is no need for reintroduction. You have not let JESUS enter you. If you don't give yourself to JESUS, your reintroduction is just nonsense.

Is there something in the BIBLE you did not understand? It is quite simple book to understand, but if you are a bit retard, there can be difficulties - and that all is because of your sins. Just let us know what exact verses you did not understand. Or did you even read it?!?!?!

John 3:3
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
FranklinAndPearl's Avatar
FranklinAndPearl FranklinAndPearl is offline
True Christians™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Friend of Jesus Real American™ Touched by Jesus True Christian Beauty Best stoning bucket Heaven Bound Ex-Masturbator True Christian™ Pro-Life Tell her once Most Obedient True Heterosexual™ True Christian Lady Eats the Most Pork Heaven Bound Heart of compassion Crown of Life Sticking with the original Trump of GOD Trumpette

 
Posts: 163
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Mountain Grove, Missouri
FranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFranklinAndPearl has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 10:01 AM

Proverbs 14:16-18

We are not the ones you must 'reintroduce' yourself to, homo. Try reintroducing yourself to your Father, the LORD.

Regards, Franklin


Just a loving, saved, MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL couple sharing this account! Wwwwwwwwwwwwwwww Hi Carol, not sure why the Face book isn't typing out my letters, LOL. I hope you can see this message, none of the letters are going in the box. Maybe they are invisible? We do not really understand Computers or Technology. I will have to ask Anita about this. See you tomor
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
Nobar King's Avatar
Nobar King Nobar King is offline
Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
Christ's Guardian
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Christian Provider™ award Ribfest '07 Christian Love Tin Tither Real American™ Cleanest Kitchen Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Hotrodder Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian True Christian Nerd TC Bravery Ex-liberal Ex-Christ-Killer Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 5 Years Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life 20,000 posts Eats the Most Pork True Republican Divorcee Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Early riser Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Grammar Nazi Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Cup of Jesus Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 10:34 AM

You're not bi, you're weak. Get over yourself.


May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
Faith_Machine's Avatar
Faith_Machine Faith_Machine is offline
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Porn Resistant True Republican The Lord’s Witness Wound Pro-Life Ex-liberal Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Flat Earth Tell her once Guns, Guts and GLORY! Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior TC Bravery True Christian Hotrodder Tagging for Jesus Paula Deen Negro Support Group Early riser Touched by Jesus 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Mission to Korea Anti-sodomy Mission to Messico Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Sheep Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Chili Chemtrail

 
Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 10:43 AM

Hello gay person, I am sorry that you are gay. I have added you to my prayer list. God will heal you, but you have to be willing to be healed.


WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
Aggressus's Avatar
Aggressus Aggressus is offline
Unsaved trash, obese teenaged queer
 
Posts: 17
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: hanging w/ the bae in moscow.
Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.Aggressus is a sinner who is given over to unnatural affections and blasphemy, and whose chances of Salvation© are limited.
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 02:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyTightLips View Post
hello there! i've already made an intro post but i believe many people misunderstood me and a few other posts on here. just wanted to start fresh.

first of all i am bi but not by choice. my gay dads forced me to be gay and now i'm it's like i'm addicted to it. i try not to be but gayness is like a disease. i have since cut my Satanist dads out of my life completely and am trying to be a True Christian.

i try to avoid the sin of homersexuality and sodomy at all times but it is hard. i find myself performing gay acts with other men and trannies many times a week as well as watching porn and having dirty thoughts.

i understand this is an abomination and i am unsaved trash. i am begging the other members of this Church, as well as God Himself, for forgiveness and to help me in my time of need.

for the sake of my eternal soul, i am on my knees in front of you all begging you for help. please open up your hearts and let your forgiveness spray out on to me!
no one's forcing you into homosexuality. it's your body that's doing what it wants and experimenting pretty much. you can't suddenly stop being gay or bi because it's how you were born. it's in your dna, believe it or not. forcing yourself into being straight is actually going to make you more unhappy because it's not who you are. accept yourself. there's nothing wrong with you, being gay is not a disease and your parents didn't bring you into it.

for the longest time i hated myself for being gay. i thought people wouldn't like me anymore and i'd lose the friendships i had formed. well, yes, i did lose a lot of people in my life, my parents included because they don't support lgbtqa+ rights but was it better for me in the long run? absolutely! getting rid of those toxic people in my life that weren't supportive of me gave me a more positive atmosphere to be in. i met better friends who loved and cared for me better than my parents ever could, all because i accepted myself and didn't force myself to be who i wasn't.

with that being said, if you still want to practice religion, such as christianity, go ahead! just don't let it get in the way of you being of a different sexuality. there are a lot of gay christians out there.


This space is reserved for KJV Scripture ONLY! --ADMIN
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
Faith_Machine's Avatar
Faith_Machine Faith_Machine is offline
Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™

True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Friend of Jesus Porn Resistant True Republican The Lord’s Witness Wound Pro-Life Ex-liberal Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Flat Earth Tell her once Guns, Guts and GLORY! Saved 1 Year Prayer Warrior TC Bravery True Christian Hotrodder Tagging for Jesus Paula Deen Negro Support Group Early riser Touched by Jesus 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Mission to Korea Anti-sodomy Mission to Messico Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Sheep Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Chili Chemtrail

 
Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Faith_Machine will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 03:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aggressus View Post
there are a lot of gay christians out there.
Sure there are. And do you know how they avoid going to Hell? By completely abstaining from all gay sex and gay romance. If they don't do that, then they aren't actually Christians.

The Bible is very clear on the need to avoid acting on your gay impulses. I don't see how you think somebody can ignore the Bible yet still be a Christian. Would you care to elaborate on how you think that would be possible?


WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
Freddy Osborne's Avatar
Freddy Osborne Freddy Osborne is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Ready for the Rapture Friend of Jesus Porn Resistant True Christian™ Christian Love True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Tell her once Touched by Jesus Porn Resistant Anti-sodomy Hands Off

 
Posts: 533
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Love Child of Pastor Osborne
Freddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureFreddy Osborne has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 05:08 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyTightLips View Post
hello there! i've already made an intro post but i believe many people misunderstood me and a few other posts on here. just wanted to start fresh.

first of all i am bi but not by choice. my gay dads forced me to be gay and now i'm it's like i'm addicted to it. i try not to be but gayness is like a disease. i have since cut my Satanist dads out of my life completely and am trying to be a True Christian.

i try to avoid the sin of homersexuality and sodomy at all times but it is hard. i find myself performing gay acts with other men and trannies many times a week as well as watching porn and having dirty thoughts.

i understand this is an abomination and i am unsaved trash. i am begging the other members of this Church, as well as God Himself, for forgiveness and to help me in my time of need.

for the sake of my eternal soul, i am on my knees in front of you all begging you for help. please open up your hearts and let your forgiveness spray out on to me!
Hello Johnny,
Were you gay in your intro? If so, why haven't signed up for some gay rehab or something? You should show some effort and then ask Jesus to save you.

And maybe change your name. John is a fine name. The rest is TMI.

YiC,
Freddy


"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven." (Matthew 5:16)

"But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery." (Matthew 5:32)
Reply With Quote
(#10)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 22,727
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 05:23 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aggressus View Post
no one's forcing you into homosexuality.
Well, that's where you're wrong. True, so far no one has held a gun to my head and demanded homersuxual acts of me (unlike that unfortunate Rev. Rodimer) but this constant song of "It's OK, It's normal; They can't help it, ad nauseam", are all small urging to try "being gay."

There are those out there who are weak-minded and who will say, "OK, I'll do it... I can handle it..." and before you know it they are all interior designers with a side-line in hairdressing who are saving up money to buy a choirboy off a catlick priest.





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
(#11)
Old
Alvin Moss's Avatar
Alvin Moss Alvin Moss is offline
Serving Jesus
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Heaven Bound Ready for the Rapture True Christian™ Christian Love Real American™ True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Proud Niglet Sponsorer Touched by Jesus One Year/1000 posts Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Sons of Liberty Porn Resistant Early riser Tell her once Persecuted Bronze Tither Punched the most queers Mission to Korea Trump of GOD True Republican Donald Trump 2016! 2015 Witch Hunt Award Prayer Warrior Kirk Cameron Fan Club Hands Off True Heterosexual™ 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College Nuke of Heaven Crown of Glory Mower Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Gunfest '14 Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Crown of Incorruptibility Alternative Facts Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 4,470
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Godly Texas, Besieged by Papist Idol Worshippers
Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Alvin Moss will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 08:09 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyTightLips View Post
hello there! i've already made an intro post but i believe many people misunderstood me and a few other posts on here. just wanted to start fresh.

first of all i am bi but not by choice. my gay dads forced me to be gay and now i'm it's like i'm addicted to it. i try not to be but gayness is like a disease. i have since cut my Satanist dads out of my life completely and am trying to be a True Christian.

i try to avoid the sin of homersexuality and sodomy at all times but it is hard. i find myself performing gay acts with other men and trannies many times a week as well as watching porn and having dirty thoughts.

i understand this is an abomination and i am unsaved trash. i am begging the other members of this Church, as well as God Himself, for forgiveness and to help me in my time of need.

for the sake of my eternal soul, i am on my knees in front of you all begging you for help. please open up your hearts and let your forgiveness spray out on to me!

This reintroduction was quite unnecessary, IMO. We have understood you quite well from the very beginning. You are a godless homosexual who lusts for other men. You have tried to mislead us concerning that fact, you have tried to blame other perverts for your own perversions and sins, you have attempted to convince us that you seek Jesus, when it is quite clear that you hate Him and you say you seek God and want to repent your many vile sins, but you have made no attempt to do so.

Yes, we know you and those like you very well. You are the Devil's people. You follow the Father of Lies, him who holds sway in the Fiery Pit, the lake that burns with fire and knows no quenching. You are here, like so many before you, to jest at our expense, to scoff and laugh at Christians. We are unaffected by your tricks. You think they are sly tricks, but they are the same old, stale tricks your kind always uses. We are bored by your antics.

But know Ye this: Get right with Jesus or burn in Hell.


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
Reply With Quote
(#12)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 08:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aggressus View Post
blahblahblah blasphemy.... there are a lot of gay christians out there.
That's what you queers hope, but I can tell you that Jesus disagrees. There can no more be "gay Christians" than there could be "bestiality Christians" or "atheist Christians." So stop lying.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#13)
Old
Pastor Isaac Peters's Avatar
Pastor Isaac Peters Pastor Isaac Peters is offline
Senior Pastor
Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™
Always Biblically correct
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ Publisher's Choice True Heterosexual™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Tithing Manager Christian Love Ex-Mary Worshipper Long service medal, 2nd class Senior Pastor Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture Ex-liberal True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life Eats the Most Pork Outreach preacher True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Anti-sodomy Hands Off Crown of Glory Probing for Jesus Alternative Facts Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Isaac Peters will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-14-2015, 11:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aggressus View Post
there are a lot of gay christians out there.
There are a lot of sodomites out there who consider themselves to be Christians, but the relevant issue is whether Jesus considers them to be Christians.

[Matthew 7:13-14, 21-23 KJV] 13 Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide [is] the gate, and broad [is] the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: 14 Because strait [is] the gate, and narrow [is] the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it. ... 21 Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. 22 Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? 23 And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.

It looks as though He doesn't.


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

Reply With Quote
(#14)
Old
Jim Farmer's Avatar
Jim Farmer Jim Farmer is offline
True Christian™
True Christian™

Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Tell her once True Christian Caucasian True Christian™ Christian Love Heaven Bound Ex-Masturbator Friend of Jesus Kangi 2014 Witch Hunt Award 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College One Year/1000 posts Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Mower Persecuted Trump of GOD Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Hands Off Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Super Soaker Baptism Award Pastor Ezekiel

 
Posts: 2,290
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: In Jesus' lap
Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Jim Farmer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-15-2015, 05:49 AM

Listen, you poofters. You have options.
If you want to go to Heaven - the first requirement is to stop the sodomy. Forever. If you don't stop the sodomy, you are guaranteed to spend eternity in Hell, regardless of anything else you do or don't do.
In the meantime during your mortal life:
If you want to give your money away to charlatans, by all means join a false Christian church who will promise you eternity in Heaven (despite what the Bible says), provided you tithe them enough. But no matter how much you tithe, you will still go to Hell, because these charlatans are after nothing more than your money and are not interested in your salvation.
If you want to keep your money in your purses, you might as well continue being an atheist sodomite. After all, you're going straight to Hell when you die, so what does it matter?



Eternity in Hell - it doesn't really sound so good, does it?

Have you had a change of heart?



Does Heaven sound nicer?
Give up your filthy ways. Allow Jesus to enter deep inside you. And enjoy Paradise for all time.


Reply With Quote
(#15)
Old
JohnnyTightLips JohnnyTightLips is offline
Unsaved trash, lying sodomite
 

Cathlick Perv

 
Posts: 36
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: in bed with my fag boyfriend
JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.JohnnyTightLips is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-16-2015, 04:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alvin Moss View Post
This reintroduction was quite unnecessary, IMO. We have understood you quite well from the very beginning. You are a godless homosexual who lusts for other men. You have tried to mislead us concerning that fact, you have tried to blame other perverts for your own perversions and sins, you have attempted to convince us that you seek Jesus, when it is quite clear that you hate Him and you say you seek God and want to repent your many vile sins, but you have made no attempt to do so.

Yes, we know you and those like you very well. You are the Devil's people. You follow the Father of Lies, him who holds sway in the Fiery Pit, the lake that burns with fire and knows no quenching. You are here, like so many before you, to jest at our expense, to scoff and laugh at Christians. We are unaffected by your tricks. You think they are sly tricks, but they are the same old, stale tricks your kind always uses. We are bored by your antics.

But know Ye this: Get right with Jesus or burn in Hell.
Well sir, you look like a fool right now. i have been gay free for just about 3 days now. HAH!

i have been praying very much and Jesus told me to tell you to back off. he will guide me through this. you think you are helping but you aren't. get over yourself!
Reply With Quote
(#16)
Old
Esther B. Esther B. is offline
Forum Member
Forum Member

Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture Quiverful

 
Posts: 582
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Under the watchful eye of my husband
Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Esther B. has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: Please allow me to reintroduce myself - 03-16-2015, 05:08 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnyTightLips View Post
Well sir, you look like a fool right now. i have been gay free for just about 3 days now. HAH!
Congratulations! Maybe there is still hope for you.


And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved