Landover to the Rescue - Christian Help Forum A Christian Help Forum led by Sister Daisy Mae Johnson. Warning! Sometimes the Lord's advice is a hard pill to swallow. |
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A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-20-2015, 02:08 PM
I am asking this question on behalf of a cousin who has finally decided to make an honest woman out of the woman that he's been courting for the last 5 years. How did you, your husband, or your husband-to-be propose? My cousin wants to give the woman a ring, but he's not sure if it would be appropriate to do so, seeing as it would give the woman a say in it.
Thank you!
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-20-2015, 05:26 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Samuel Hubbard
I am asking this question on behalf of a cousin who has finally decided to make an honest woman out of the woman that he's been courting for the last 5 years. How did you, your husband, or your husband-to-be propose? My cousin wants to give the woman a ring, but he's not sure if it would be appropriate to do so, seeing as it would give the woman a say in it.
Thank you!
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Presumably, your cousin has the permission of the prospective helpmeet's father to court. It is a simple matter to ask the man if he can marry up with his daughter.
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-20-2015, 07:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alvin Moss
Presumably, your cousin has the permission of the prospective helpmeet's father to court. It is a simple matter to ask the man if he can marry up with his daughter.
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Quite sure her father says yes. I mean, a girl is just so expensive to keep.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-20-2015, 09:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alvin Moss
Presumably, your cousin has the permission of the prospective helpmeet's father to court. It is a simple matter to ask the man if he can marry up with his daughter.
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He certainly does have permission.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marko Loimaan-Aho
Quite sure her father says yes. I mean, a girl is just so expensive to keep.
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Good point, Brother.
Thank you, gentlemen!
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-20-2015, 11:17 PM
Courting five years? Good grief, she'll be an old maid by now. What's wrong with her? Is she ugly and he's trying to get up his nerve to be fruitful and multiply with her? Is he a dwarf or something? Can he get nothing better than an ugly old lady?
I'm sorry, I just have no patience for men who pussyfoot around like little school girls rather than make a stand and do the right thing. Your cousin is a coward and you should stay far away from him, lest his obscene habits rub off on you.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 02:09 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Courting five years? Good grief, she'll be an old maid by now. What's wrong with her? Is she ugly and he's trying to get up his nerve to be fruitful and multiply with her? Is he a dwarf or something? Can he get nothing better than an ugly old lady?
I'm sorry, I just have no patience for men who pussyfoot around like little school girls rather than make a stand and do the right thing. Your cousin is a coward and you should stay far away from him, lest his obscene habits rub off on you.
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Yes, 5 years. Nothing's wrong with her, but he's always been shy. I don't know if he's afraid of being turned down or just afraid of the act of procreation. I completely understand your lack of patience, especially since my family and I have spent the last three and a half years trying to get him to propose to her. My father has said that if my cousin doesn't propose by the end of the year, he'll never be invited to any family gatherings ever again.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 07:07 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Samuel Hubbard
Yes, 5 years. Nothing's wrong with her, but he's always been shy. I don't know if he's afraid of being turned down or just afraid of the act of procreation. I completely understand your lack of patience, especially since my family and I have spent the last three and a half years trying to get him to propose to her. My father has said that if my cousin doesn't propose by the end of the year, he'll never be invited to any family gatherings ever again.
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A healthy fear of the toothed v@gina, and the cleaving unto thereof, is understandable. However, your cousin needs to buck up and be a man about this, no matter how deeply and utterly revolted by the prospect of coitus he may be. There is grim work to be done. God's work.Genesis 1:28
Also, I don't see the point of proposing to the girl once he has obtained permission from her father to marry her...he just needs to step up and inform her, in a strident tone, that she has been purchased and will be in domestic thralldom to him for the remainder of her days and that her feelings on the matter are irrelevant, as she is now chattel.
As far as mustering at least a feeble erection on his wedding night, I would advise your cousin to disassociate from reality as radically as possible....go to his "happy place", and think "happy thoughts". Envisioning Christ's scourging usually helps me achieve and maintain a feasible measure of torpidity, but your cousin can fantasize about whatever scene from the Bible he wishes.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 08:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer
Also, I don't see the point of proposing to the girl once he has obtained permission from her father to marry her...he just needs to step up and inform her, in a strident tone, that she has been purchased and will be in domestic thralldom to him for the remainder of her days and that her feelings on the matter are irrelevant, as she is now chattel.
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In some parts of the world it is customary for the girl's father to tell her, but this can backfire if he is a little forgetful or just plain indifferent to the matter. After terms had been agreed between my dear husband and my father, nobody thought to mention it to me until my mother started talking about my wedding dress.
I couldn't have been happier, of course, as Matthew is a splendid man. But, on balance, I would say it is best for the prospective husband to inform the girl as well, as it is only good manners to make sure that she knows.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 12:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer
A healthy fear of the toothed v@gina, and the cleaving unto thereof, is understandable. However, your cousin needs to buck up and be a man about this, no matter how deeply and utterly revolted by the prospect of coitus he may be. There is grim work to be done. God's work.Genesis 1:28
Also, I don't see the point of proposing to the girl once he has obtained permission from her father to marry her...he just needs to step up and inform her, in a strident tone, that she has been purchased and will be in domestic thralldom to him for the remainder of her days and that her feelings on the matter are irrelevant, as she is now chattel.
As far as mustering at least a feeble erection on his wedding night, I would advise your cousin to disassociate from reality as radically as possible....go to his "happy place", and think "happy thoughts". Envisioning Christ's scourging usually helps me achieve and maintain a feasible measure of torpidity, but your cousin can fantasize about whatever scene from the Bible he wishes.
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Brother Hammer, your first two paragraphs are almost exactly what we've been trying to tell my cousin for, as I mentioned in a previous post, the past three and a half years. Thank you for the suggestion in your third paragraph, I'll pass it on to my cousin immediately.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
In some parts of the world it is customary for the girl's father to tell her, but this can backfire if he is a little forgetful or just plain indifferent to the matter. After terms had been agreed between my dear husband and my father, nobody thought to mention it to me until my mother started talking about my wedding dress.
I couldn't have been happier, of course, as Matthew is a splendid man. But, on balance, I would say it is best for the prospective husband to inform the girl as well, as it is only good manners to make sure that she knows.
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You are correct, Sister. My cousin has permission from the girl's father, but he's not sure how to tell her. He says that he wants to make it "special," but my family just finds it unnecessary. How could anything be more special for a woman than finding out that a man is willing to spend the rest of his life putting up with her yapping and helping her achieve Salvation? It doesn't have to be "romantic" or whatever my cousin is going for?
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 12:54 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Samuel Hubbard
How did you, your husband, or your husband-to-be propose?
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I hid behind a toilet door and jumped out shouting "WILL YOU MARRY ME!!".
YIC
1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.
Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 04:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Samuel Hubbard
Brother Hammer, your first two paragraphs are almost exactly what we've been trying to tell my cousin for, as I mentioned in a previous post, the past three and a half years.
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Your cousin sounds a bit touched in the head if he can't figure out how to follow directions after three and a half years. Have you told Esther retardism runs in your family? I don't think she'd appreciate being seeded with retarded homunculus.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 05:18 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Your cousin sounds a bit touched in the head if he can't figure out how to follow directions after three and a half years. Have you told Esther retardism runs in your family? I don't think she'd appreciate being seeded with retarded homunculus.
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I am a bit worried too, Sister, because when someone writes something like
Quote:
I am asking this question on behalf of a cousin
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there is always the suspicion that they are, in fact, asking on their own behalf.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 08:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Laurence Niles
I hid behind a toilet door and jumped out shouting "WILL YOU MARRY ME!!".
YIC
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Really? That sounds exactly like something my cousin would do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Your cousin sounds a bit touched in the head if he can't figure out how to follow directions after three and a half years. Have you told Esther retardism runs in your family? I don't think she'd appreciate being seeded with retarded homunculus.
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I can understand your concern, Sister, but retardation doesn't run in my family. My cousin is just nervous and afraid of the post-marital act of seeding.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
I am a bit worried too, Sister, because when someone writes something like there is always the suspicion that they are, in fact, asking on their own behalf.
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I can see how someone would think that I'm asking on behalf of myself, but I can assure you that I'm asking for my cousin.
I'm about to leave Esther's to go visit my cousin to show him everyone's replies in an attempt to get him to propose or whatever he's going to do to let the young woman know that she's going to become his property.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-21-2015, 10:14 PM
Samuel, dear, I have a suggestion. Why don't you tell your cousin to do what your father did and grab the woman's left wrist and shove the ring onto her finger, then tell her that she's going to marry him. Your mother thought that that moment was "special," so maybe your cousin will agree.
And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-22-2015, 11:46 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Esther B.
Samuel, dear, I have a suggestion. Why don't you tell your cousin to do what your father did and grab the woman's left wrist and shove the ring onto her finger, then tell her that she's going to marry him. Your mother thought that that moment was "special," so maybe your cousin will agree.
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I saw your post while I was showing my cousin this thread and after reading your suggestion, he decided that he'll do it tonight after he gets the ring. Apparently he had ordered the ring on the same day that I made this thread, but he wanted it to be a surprise so he didn't tell any of us about it. My family and I are extremely excited, but we wish it hadn't taken this long to actually happen. I'll keep everyone updated and I can assure you that you'll know about it shortly after it happens (if it happens).
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-22-2015, 12:03 PM
Some of you may think that engagement rings are merely a vulgar display of material wealth, worn by women of no taste. This is far from being the case.
1 Timothy 2:9-10
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
Isaiah 3:16-24
Moreover the Lord saith, Because the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes, walking and mincing as they go, and making a tinkling with their feet:
Therefore the Lord will smite with a scab the crown of the head of the daughters of Zion, and the Lord will discover their secret parts.
In that day the Lord will take away the bravery of their tinkling ornaments about their feet, and their cauls, and their round tires like the moon,
The chains, and the bracelets, and the mufflers,
The bonnets, and the ornaments of the legs, and the headbands, and the tablets, and the earrings,
The rings, and nose jewels,
The changeable suits of apparel, and the mantles, and the wimples, and the crisping pins,
The glasses, and the fine linen, and the hoods, and the vails.
And it shall come to pass, that instead of sweet smell there shall be stink; and instead of a girdle a rent; and instead of well set hair baldness; and instead of a stomacher a girding of sackcloth; and burning instead of beauty.
I do hope, Samuel, that when your cousin's wife suffers this fate you will post the photos here, to serve as a warning to other misguided men and women.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-22-2015, 09:31 PM
It is important to have a close relationship before choosing to marry. For example, I married my third cousin and it ended in disaster.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-23-2015, 12:40 AM
Praise God, my cousin has proposed!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey
Some of you may think that engagement rings are merely a vulgar display of material wealth, worn by women of no taste. This is far from being the case.
1 Timothy 2:9-10
In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.
Isaiah 3:16-24
Moreover the Lord saith, Because the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes, walking and mincing as they go, and making a tinkling with their feet:
Therefore the Lord will smite with a scab the crown of the head of the daughters of Zion, and the Lord will discover their secret parts.
In that day the Lord will take away the bravery of their tinkling ornaments about their feet, and their cauls, and their round tires like the moon,
The chains, and the bracelets, and the mufflers,
The bonnets, and the ornaments of the legs, and the headbands, and the tablets, and the earrings,
The rings, and nose jewels,
The changeable suits of apparel, and the mantles, and the wimples, and the crisping pins,
The glasses, and the fine linen, and the hoods, and the vails.
And it shall come to pass, that instead of sweet smell there shall be stink; and instead of a girdle a rent; and instead of well set hair baldness; and instead of a stomacher a girding of sackcloth; and burning instead of beauty.
I do hope, Samuel, that when your cousin's wife suffers this fate you will post the photos here, to serve as a warning to other misguided men and women.
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I most certainly will, Sister!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
It is important to have a close relationship before choosing to marry. For example, I married my third cousin and it ended in disaster.
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You are absolutely correct, Brother! The close relationship was my cousin's main excuse for putting off the proposal. But it's all over now and plans are being made for the wedding.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-23-2015, 02:14 AM
My wife has a pattern for a modest burlap wedding dress if the bride-to-be would like to sew herself something appropriate for the occasion.
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Re: A Question for the Married and Engaged Forum Members -
07-23-2015, 11:51 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer
My wife has a pattern for a modest burlap wedding dress if the bride-to-be would like to sew herself something appropriate for the occasion.
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Thank you for the suggestion, Brother Hammer! I'll call my cousin and direct him to this thread so he can show his bride-to-be your suggestion. I'm sure that the two of them will love it, especially since his bride-to-be is incredibly modest and likes to avoid any kind of showy, flashy garments.
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