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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
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Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 01:16 AM
As most of you know, I have been hard at work extending my log cabin so that I can throw my own dung eating, piss drinking parties, as the Bible suggests in a couple of places:
2 Kings 18:26-27
King James Version (KJV)
26Then said Eliakim the son of Hilkiah, and Shebna, and Joah, unto Rabshakeh, Speak, I pray thee, to thy servants in the Syrian language; for we understand it: and talk not with us in the Jews' language in the ears of the people that are on the wall.
27But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy master, and to thee, to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
Isaiah 36:11-12
King James Version (KJV)
11Then said Eliakim and Shebna and Joah unto Rabshakeh, Speak, I pray thee, unto thy servants in the Syrian language; for we understand it: and speak not to us in the Jews' language, in the ears of the people that are on the wall.
12But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
This way we can finally meet our extended neighbors.
Please bring your own dung and piss.
R.S.V.P. below:
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Posts: 22,424
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Close to God
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 11:21 AM
I am afraid I will be out of town that day.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Also loves Jesus and America
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Posts: 820
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Location: Lone Christian in pagan Oregon
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 02:40 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
As most of you know, I have been hard at work extending my log cabin so that I can throw my own dung eating, piss drinking parties, as the Bible suggests in a couple of places:
2 Kings 18:26-27
King James Version (KJV)
26Then said Eliakim the son of Hilkiah, and Shebna, and Joah, unto Rabshakeh, Speak, I pray thee, to thy servants in the Syrian language; for we understand it: and talk not with us in the Jews' language in the ears of the people that are on the wall.
27But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy master, and to thee, to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
Isaiah 36:11-12
King James Version (KJV)
11Then said Eliakim and Shebna and Joah unto Rabshakeh, Speak, I pray thee, unto thy servants in the Syrian language; for we understand it: and speak not to us in the Jews' language, in the ears of the people that are on the wall.
12But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
This way we can finally meet our extended neighbors.
Please bring your own dung and piss.
R.S.V.P. below:
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I'll be there. I'll be sure to eat Messican grub the day before, so I can share a big heap of my special, personal, piquant bean dip. Sounds like a real "pot" luck !!
Leviticus 13:44 He is a leprous man, he is UNCLEAN: the priest shall pronounce him utterly UNCLEAN; his plague is in his head.
2 Kings 6:25 And there was a great famine in Samaria: and, behold, they besieged it, until an ass's head was sold for fourscore pieces of silver, and the fourth part of a cab of dove's dung for five pieces of silver.
King James Bible v1611
Good Enough For JESUS....Good Enough For Me !!
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 07:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
I am afraid I will be out of town that day.
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Don't worry, there will be plenty of leftovers.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,179
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MIA
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 08:16 PM
It looks like you guys are going to have some jolly good time - and totally scripturally correct to boot:
Ezekiel 4:12 And thou shalt eat it as barley cakes, and thou shalt bake it with dung that cometh out of man, in their sight.
I’m envious; I wish I could join, but a journey would take me too long; I don’t trust in non-Biblical means of transport. Nevertheless, I’ll be with you on my mind, sending bowel sounds (in terms of Isaiah 16:11) in your general direction.
Ask not what your Lord can do for you. Ask what you can do for your Lord.
... your choice entirely (Matthew 12:30)
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With faith as immovable as the Earth
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,779
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Body in England but HEART IN FREEHOLD!
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 10:04 PM
Unfortunately as I am in England I will not be able to make it. However Mrs O'fagan makes a lovely yule log. One is in the post to you,
enjoy,
Jack
Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 10:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack O'fagan
Unfortunately as I am in England I will not be able to make it. However Mrs O'fagan makes a lovely yule log. One is in the post to you,
enjoy,
Jack
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She made that all by herself? Is she a large woman?
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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With faith as immovable as the Earth
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,779
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Body in England but HEART IN FREEHOLD!
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 10:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
She made that all by herself? Is she a large woman?
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Not as large as she was this morning.
Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.
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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Posts: 22,727
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 11:15 PM
It is with some regret that although I accepted earlier, I have now re-read the invitation and find I have a subsequent appointment.
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The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
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Posts: 4,391
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: America's Frozen Attic
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-15-2011, 11:35 PM
What the heck, I'm in. It'll be an improvement on the wife's cooking.
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True Christian™
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Location: MIA
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 07:25 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack O'fagan
Unfortunately as I am in England I will not be able to make it. However Mrs O'fagan makes a lovely yule log. One is in the post to you...
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Hallelujah! Now, that’s a huge piece of… a log. Does it smell as good as it looks?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
She made that all by herself? Is she a large woman?
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My thoughts exactly; Brother Jack, you were blessed with an extraordinary prolific wife; I bet she’s able to deliver up to four sons at once.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Enoch
What the heck, I'm in. It'll be an improvement on the wife's cooking.
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That’s the spirit!
Ask not what your Lord can do for you. Ask what you can do for your Lord.
... your choice entirely (Matthew 12:30)
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 09:51 AM
Billy Bob, I have not yet been granted authorization to enter Freehold. Therefore, I'm sorry to say I won't be able to accept your kind invitation. Maybe next year?
WARNING:
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 01:16 PM
I have checked with the airlines today and availablilty is good: when is your opening scheduled?
Mrs Jack O'fagan's log certainly looked rich - and I noticed some interesting toadstools; are they fresh Mr O'fagan? Perhaps it would be possible to prepare a vivifying drink Mark 16:18
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 01:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor
Mrs Jack O'fagan's log certainly looked rich - and I noticed some interesting toadstools; are they fresh Mr O'fagan? Perhaps it would be possible to prepare a vivifying drink Mark 16:18
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The only vivifying drink we will need is our own piss!
John 7:38
King James Version (KJV)
38He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 02:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy Bob Jenkins
The only vivifying drink we will need is our own piss!
John 7:38
King James Version (KJV)
38He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.
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Thank you for your correction Mr Jenkins. I understand that to DELIBERATELY drink poison would be to tempt God Deuteronomy 6:16 and similarly to handle serpents would be inappropriate as I have read in other posts. I mean to take them in hand to show off how good one was at it.
I continued reading The New Testament and at Acts 28 noticed how when Paul encountered his viper, it was not deliberate
Acts 28:3-5 And when Paul had gathered a bundle of stickes, and layde them on the fire, there came a Uiper out of the heat, and fastened on his hand. And when the Barbarians saw the venomous beast hang on his hand, they saide among themselues, No doubt this man is a murtherer, whom though hee hath escaped the Sea, yet Uengeance suffereth not to liue. And hee shooke off the beast into the fire, and felt no harme.
©1611
Am I understanding correctly? Is God punishing those snake-handling cults for their error, when they die?
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Family Man of the Year 2010-2013 About as Straight and Manly as you can get Hates anal sex. And trees.
True Christian™
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Posts: 8,323
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Protecting my children from homosexuals
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 02:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor
Thank you for your correction Mr Jenkins. I understand that to DELIBERATELY drink poison would be to tempt God Deuteronomy 6:16 and similarly to handle serpents would be inappropriate as I have read in other posts. I mean to take them in hand to show off how good one was at it.
I continued reading The New Testament and at Acts 28 noticed how when Paul encountered his viper, it was not deliberate
Acts 28:3-5 And when Paul had gathered a bundle of stickes, and layde them on the fire, there came a Uiper out of the heat, and fastened on his hand. And when the Barbarians saw the venomous beast hang on his hand, they saide among themselues, No doubt this man is a murtherer, whom though hee hath escaped the Sea, yet Uengeance suffereth not to liue. And hee shooke off the beast into the fire, and felt no harme.
©1611
Am I understanding correctly? Is God punishing those snake-handling cults for their error, when they die?
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This is a celebration, Mitza!
Ecclesiastes 3
1To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
2A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
3A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
9What profit hath he that worketh in that wherein he laboureth?
10I have seen the travail, which God hath given to the sons of men to be exercised in it.
11He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.
12I know that there is no good in them, but for a man to rejoice, and to do good in his life.
13And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it is the gift of God.
14I know that, whatsoever God doeth, it shall be for ever: nothing can be put to it, nor any thing taken from it: and God doeth it, that men should fear before him.
15That which hath been is now; and that which is to be hath already been; and God requireth that which is past.
16And moreover I saw under the sun the place of judgment, that wickedness was there; and the place of righteousness, that iniquity was there.
17I said in mine heart, God shall judge the righteous and the wicked: for there is a time there for every purpose and for every work.
18I said in mine heart concerning the estate of the sons of men, that God might manifest them, and that they might see that they themselves are beasts.
19For that which befalleth the sons of men befalleth beasts; even one thing befalleth them: as the one dieth, so dieth the other; yea, they have all one breath; so that a man hath no preeminence above a beast: for all is vanity.
20All go unto one place; all are of the dust, and all turn to dust again.
21Who knoweth the spirit of man that goeth upward, and the spirit of the beast that goeth downward to the earth?
22Wherefore I perceive that there is nothing better, than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion: for who shall bring him to see what shall be after him?
The Only Real Climate Change Will be Hell!
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
True Christian™
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Posts: 14,663
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Leviticus Landing
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 02:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor
I have checked with the airlines today and availablilty is good: when is your opening scheduled?
Mrs Jack O'fagan's log certainly looked rich - and I noticed some interesting toadstools; are they fresh Mr O'fagan? Perhaps it would be possible to prepare a vivifying drink Mark 16:18
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I might have got off on a red herring there - I know it's a celebration and will not be bringing any toadstools.
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With faith as immovable as the Earth
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,779
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Body in England but HEART IN FREEHOLD!
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 03:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor
Mrs Jack O'fagan's log certainly looked rich - and I noticed some interesting toadstools; are they fresh Mr O'fagan?
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Yes they are very fresh. They certainly were not there when she made it. This may be a result of her vegetarian diet and a good compost.
YIC
Jack
Genesis 22:2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
I know God wouldn't let me believe in Him if He didn't exist.
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True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Posts: 29,835
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 05:37 PM
You can add my family to the list. Every child that has completed her chores as well as every son that is not on active duty in Afganistan killing heathens will attend, assuming they will all fit on a low boy flat bed. This is what a low boy looks like. I got a lot of grief when I used a reefer.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Dyed-in-the-wool True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,980
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: San Francisco, California
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Re: Extension to my Log Cabin Complete. Freehold Invited to Eat Dung and Drink Piss. Bring Own Dish. -
08-16-2011, 09:37 PM
James, have you ever had any problems with any of your employees suffocating in a reefer? It seems to me that you were surely well intentioned, as I'm certain it can get awfully hot out in those fields, and you simply meant to give them a chance to cool off when being transported to and from their work sites.
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.
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