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skeeters -
10-03-2006, 07:30 AM
Last night I couldn't sleep because a mosquito was in my room pestering me. At first was a little bit annoyed because I had a big day ahead and needed my rest. But then I got to thinking, "God put this skeeter in my room to teach me a lesson." Then I figured it out. Think of the millions of sinners the mosquito has sent to Hell what with Malaria and west nile!
Well, I let that skeeter be and even pulled back the covers a bit so he could bite me and maybe start some new disease to spread among the heathens. Tomorrow when I get some time I'm going put some tires around the yard and fill them with water to breed more skeeters.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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LBC psychiatric outpatient. Progressing nicely.
True Christian™
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Posts: 989
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, IA
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 08:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.eliot mayfield
Well, I let that skeeter be and even pulled back the covers a bit so he could bite me and maybe start some new disease to spread among the heathens.
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that a bootiful idea Mr.Mayfield, an i prays that moskeeto give you a HIVee dissease that folks catch when they use unsaved bathrooms, cuz that be easy to pass on!
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 11:05 AM
Wait a minute.....are you saying you wanted to be infected by the mosquito or that you have disease that the mosquito could spread?
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 11:42 AM
I want God to create through me.
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 01:07 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
I want God to create through me.
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Praise Jesus, don't we all? If only True Christianity was communicable in such a simple way...even the witch VanHellbent would be Saved.
God truely works in mysterious ways.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 01:11 PM
So are you saying that you currently carry a communicable disease....? Because that's sure what it sounds like
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 03:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing
So are you saying that you currently carry a communicable disease....? Because that's sure what it sounds like
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No heathen, we are saying we hope God makes us the carriers of deadly diseases so we can spread His Wrath® among the wicked.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 06:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by eliot mayfield
Well, I let that skeeter be and even pulled back the covers a bit so he could bite me and maybe start some new disease to spread among the heathens. Tomorrow when I get some time I'm going put some tires around the yard and fill them with water to breed more skeeters.
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Today's entomology lesson:
Only female mosquitoes require blood meals. The males are vegetarians.
Disease transmission: It seems logical that since you can get AIDS from sharing a needle with an infected person, sharing a mosquito could transmit it as well since it does so with other viruses such as Dengue fever and Malaria. But thus far no one has demonstrated that mosquitoes are vectors for the disease. The difference seems to be that the HIV virus does not infect or reproduce within the mosquito while the others do, but it is possible that the life cycle of mosquitoes is simply too short to allow the virus to develop.
Even so, if a mosquito or a vampire bat dipped it's wick in an HIV patient's arm and then decided you were dessert, you could get a small viral load from it.
It is also stated as fact that one cannot get HIV from kissing because there is an insufficient number of virus cells in saliva to transmit the disease. No one has ever defined 'insufficient number'. Personally, I won't be swapping spit with any HIV patients.
There will be a practical portion of this course later involving Lilith and Rachael van HELLsing who have volunteered to be throat-swabs. Please sign up in the Landover auditorium.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 07:04 PM
Sure, skeeters can be a Trial. But if you want to get into real Wickedness (please turn your head, Miss Petal) nothing's equal to the Sinful housecat, who gives you fleas. Which then gives this Brimstone Beast - and your Christian Home - the tapeworm. In all of it's wriggling, segmented Glory.
I don't think I can go on.....
SUV
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 07:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
Today's entomology lesson:
There will be a practical portion of this course later involving Lilith and Rachael van HELLsing who have volunteered to be throat-swabs. Please sign up in the Landover auditorium.
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The fact that AIDs is not that transmittable is witnessed by the lack of a panepidemic among Ukrainian sailors. Christian scientists studying the disease in Africa have theorized the disease is only easily transmitted for a brief period after infection. This way the Lord can target the sinner's spouse too in His wrath without hitting innocent bystanders.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 07:53 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Sue Vera
Sure, skeeters can be a Trial. But if you want to get into real Wickedness (please turn your head, Miss Petal) nothing's equal to the Sinful housecat, who gives you fleas. Which then gives this Brimstone Beast - and your Christian Home - the tapeworm. In all of it's wriggling, segmented Glory.
I don't think I can go on.....
SUV
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Please don't. That picture you posted once showing the creatures burrowing into your eyelids grossed me out forever!
They have cures for fleas now. Ask one of the pet experts at Wal-Mart. If you get a tapeworm, swallowing a tablespoon of kerosene or gasoline will kill it and (probably) won't kill you with it.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 08:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
Please don't. That picture you posted once showing the creature burrowing into your eyelids grossed me out forever!
They have cures for fleas now. Ask one of the pet experts at Wal-Mart. If you get a tapeworm, swallowing a tablespoon of kerosene or gasoline will kill it and (probably) won't kill you with it.
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"Kill it" as in the cat?
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 08:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe
"Kill it" as in the cat?
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No, as in the tapeworm. It is one of the wonderful 'field expedient' disease cures I learned in Vietnam.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 08:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
No, as in the tapeworm. It is one of the wonderful 'field expedient' disease cures I learned in Vietnam.
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Really? Now I know why you say gasoline is Jesus gift to His elect. You also mentioned a can of it was useful for letting those Boodist monks over there see the Light of Jesus.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
Hot Must ReadThreads!
Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
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Posts: 15,473
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Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 09:00 PM
Whaaaat? These precious angels have fleas?
Say it ain't so!
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
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Re: skeeters -
10-03-2006, 09:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
Whaaaat? These precious angels have fleas?
Say it ain't so!
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Only Sue Vera's. She isn't the best housekeeper in the world.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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True Christian™ Princess The Driving Force behind RA12 Have at it, anytime!
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Posts: 11,024
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: skeeters -
10-04-2006, 12:46 AM
Well, what do you people want for nothing? I've been here six years now and I still haven't even been given my Easter ham yet! And I AM A VERY ATTRACTIVE WOMAN!!!!!
SUV
PS WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO RETIRE ME?!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
Only Sue Vera's. She isn't the best housekeeper in the world.
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HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
Forum Member
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Posts: 5,110
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Red Peking
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Re: skeeters -
10-04-2006, 01:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe
No heathen, we are saying we hope God makes us the carriers of deadly diseases so we can spread His Wrath® among the wicked.
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Ah, that would explain the 'field trips' that the Pastors take to stri....uhh....places where the younger members of the congregation can learn about things you all consider wicked....
Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Christ's Cōnsiliārius
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Posts: 9,311
Join Date: Sep 2006
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Re: skeeters -
10-04-2006, 05:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Sue Vera
Well, what do you people want for nothing? I've been here six years now and I still haven't even been given my Easter ham yet! And I AM A VERY ATTRACTIVE WOMAN!!!!!
SUV
PS WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO RETIRE ME?!
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Yes, everyone agrees that you are very attractive...or were during Woodstock when there was a lot of illicit LSD floating around.
RETIRE YOU?!?!? NEVER! You will be here longer than Mother Theresa (may she burn in hell for a heretic) was in Calcutta.
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6
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God Squad
True Christian™
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Posts: 9,322
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: rebuking eurotrash commies
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Re: skeeters -
10-04-2006, 06:55 AM
Another wonder from God's kingdom to punish people who go swimming without enough clothing on. Praise God!
I may try to raise some of these and dump them into swimming pools where the girls wear bikinis!
This little gem of God's creation is called the candiru. Truly a marvel for keeping your clothes on when bathing.
"It can anchor itself in a most intimate part of the human anatomy, leading one jokester to dub it Urinophilus diabolicus. In English it is candidly known as the urethra fish, because it can actually swim up the urethra of an unsuspecting bather and lodge itself firmly in place by flaring sharp spines along its gills. Not only does this make for a most excruciating ordeal, but once embedded, the cold-blooded little terror can't be removed by anything short of surgery."
http://magazine.audubon.org/ask/9901.html
Matthew:
5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
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