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WEDDING BELLS! - Christian Wedding Forum A seasonal forum hosted by cyber Bridesmaids, Daisy Mae Johnson, Sister Mary Etheldreda and Sister Talitha . Groomly advice is also offered from Best Man, Pastor Zeke!

 
 
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 09:58 PM

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Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
That doesn't sound romantic at all, a man normally asks "will you marry me?", because marriage should be about love. You have a very weird ideas about what relationships are
Go away, fag! This is a thread for celebration and congratulation, not for spreading your warped, satanic ideology!
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 10:01 PM

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Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
Go away, fag! This is a thread for celebration and congratulation, not for spreading your warped, satanic ideology!
Saying married people should love each other is satanic? Why?
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 10:05 PM

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Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
Saying married people should love each other is satanic? Why?
Man should love woman as Christ loves the church...with an iron fist. Sickos like you who talk about romance equate love with sex. Get the hence, pervert.
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 10:16 PM

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Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
Man should love woman as Christ loves the church...with an iron fist. Sickos like you who talk about romance equate love with sex. Get the hence, pervert.
Ugh, if someday I marry a man who thinks like you, I'll get divorced in no time. Marriage based in something that's not pure and simple love never ends well. I want a husband who loves me for who I am, a man who understand me, somebody who can also be my friend and specially somebody I can trust, somebody who acts according to what's truly right and never uses violence to solve problems. If I have that kind of marriage I'll be teaching my children how they're supposed to behave with a boyfriend or a girlfriend
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 10:20 PM

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Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
Ugh, if someday I marry a man who thinks like you, I'll get divorced in no time. Marriage based in something that's not pure and simple love never ends well. I want a husband who loves me for who I am, a man who understand me, somebody who can also be my friend and specially somebody I can trust, somebody who acts according to what's truly right and never uses violence to solve problems. If I have that kind of marriage I'll be teaching my children how they're supposed to behave with a boyfriend or a girlfriend
Look mister, you've already sullied the spirit of this thread enough, go plan your gay marriage someplace else and molest us Godly folk no more!
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 10:28 PM

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Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
Look mister, you've already sullied the spirit of this thread enough, go plan your gay marriage someplace else and molest us Godly folk no more!
Sorry, but you're wrong, I'm a girl, and no, I have no plans of getting married soon, I rather wait for the right man, maybe I get married at 27 o 28, when I have my college degree and a good job, also enough savings to pay for the dress, the flowers, the party after the wedding and the honeymoon. The only thing I care about when the day comes is having a good man by my side
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 10:37 PM

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Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
Sorry, but you're wrong, I'm a girl, and no, I have no plans of getting married soon, I rather wait for the right man, maybe I get married at 27 o 28, when I have my college degree and a good job, also enough savings to pay for the dress, the flowers, the party after the wedding and the honeymoon. The only thing I care about when the day comes is having a good man by my side
Wow, you're all mixed up, chief.
I'll pray for you, its all I can do...
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 11:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
Saying married people should love each other is satanic? Why?
The Holy Bible doesn't say anything about the romantic love to which you are referring, dear.


Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.

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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 07-31-2015, 11:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
Sorry, but you're wrong, I'm a girl, and no, I have no plans of getting married soon, I rather wait for the right man, maybe I get married at 27 o 28, when I have my college degree and a good job, also enough savings to pay for the dress, the flowers, the party after the wedding and the honeymoon. The only thing I care about when the day comes is having a good man by my side
We're not wrong, you are. True Christians™ (like Brother Hammer) are always right.

Also, I find it incredibly appalling that you not only want to waste several of your prime child-bearing years AND work outside the home. God wants you to get married ASAP and have as many children as possible. The sooner you get married, the more children you'll have. Genesis 1:28


And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-01-2015, 12:36 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Esther B. View Post
We're not wrong, you are. True Christians™ (like Brother Hammer) are always right.

Also, I find it incredibly appalling that you not only want to waste several of your prime child-bearing years AND work outside the home. God wants you to get married ASAP and have as many children as possible. The sooner you get married, the more children you'll have. Genesis 1:28
I'm not going to have lots of children right now just because you think that's ok, I want to have family, but in the right time and when I find the right man. And besides, that verse don't mentions women, it talks about being fruitful, not about if you're a woman you must marry quickly
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-01-2015, 12:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
I'm not going to have lots of children right now just because you think that's ok, I want to have family, but in the right time and when I find the right man. And besides, that verse don't mentions women, it talks about being fruitful, not about if you're a woman you must marry quickly
If a woman waits until her late 20s to get married, she'll have wasted some of her fertile years and will have less children than she would have had if she had gotten married in her late teens. So the quicker a woman gets married, the more children she'll have.


And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-01-2015, 12:53 AM

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Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
I'm not going to have lots of children right now just because you think that's ok, I want to have family, but in the right time and when I find the right man. And besides, that verse don't mentions women, it talks about being fruitful, not about if you're a woman you must marry quickly


God is not talking about giving birth to Banana's


You only have so much time to be fruitful....somewhere between 12 and 20, I think. According to my abacus, you can pump out 8 to 9 in that time.
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-01-2015, 01:15 AM

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Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
That doesn't sound romantic at all, a man normally asks "will you marry me?", because marriage should be about love. You have a very weird ideas about what relationships are
Our ideas about marriage aren't weird, yours are. As Sister Mary said, romantic love has no place in a True Christian™ marriage. The only love is between God, the husband, and the wife. The husband shows his love for his wife by correcting her when she makes a mistake and doing the unpleasant task of seeding her so she can have children and achieve Salvation (1 Timothy 2:15). The wife shows her love for her husband by submitting to him as commanded in Colossians 3:18.
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-01-2015, 01:22 AM

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Originally Posted by Samuel Hubbard View Post
...The husband shows his love for his wife by correcting her when she makes a mistake and doing the unpleasant task of seeding her so she can have children and achieve Salvation (1 Timothy 2:15). The wife shows her love for her husband by submitting to him as commanded in Colossians 3:18.
And God shows His love by not killing all of them before the successful procreation.

Maybe.

Or, maybe not.

Either way, it shows He loves you.


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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-01-2015, 03:34 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by RunningInTheBeach View Post
I'm not going to have lots of children right now just because you think that's ok, I want to have family, but in the right time and when I find the right man. And besides, that verse don't mentions women, it talks about being fruitful, not about if you're a woman you must marry quickly
Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Esther B. Esther B. is offline
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-01-2015, 03:49 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by H. Montague Worthington View Post
Congratulations, Esther. I know that you and Samuel will be very happy!! Just make sure to obey and follow instructions to the letter, and all will be joyous.

I consider myself blessed by God that I have had the love, faithful obedience, and loyal companionship of my wife Delores for the past 43 years now.

Our marriage is pretty much like any other, as we have learned to not push too strongly in the areas that cause undo tension, and we give each other enough space to explore our own particular areas of interest that aren't shared equally. These days she mostly sticks to her wing of the house except while serving me breakfast, lunch and dinner, and I stick to mine. She is not allowed in the basement (believe me-- she won't dare make THAT mistake again!!), and I steer clear of her arts and crafts studio. (One of her hobbies is making crude primitive cloth dolls that bear my resemblance and burning or destroying them in a bubbling sulfuric acid bath while speaking in tongues-- see why I have no interest in her hobbies?).

Of course we attend church together every Sunday and Wednesday night Bible study, and she is often asked to attend my business-related social events around town. We also have a standing Thursday night dinner and Sunday after church meal at Olive Garden. We took a trip together to Omaha for two days in 2005 to attend a funeral. She is mostly responsible for communicating with the children as I don't particularly care for two out of three of them. She has a list of six approved friends who are allowed to visit her at home during appropriate hours that don't interfere with her wifely duties, but she has only invited two of them, and that was quite some time ago.

So again, congratulations, and I hope you two are every bit as happy as we are!!
Thank you, Brother! I hope that Samuel and I will be as happy as your and your wife.


And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
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BrotherLarry BrotherLarry is offline
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-02-2015, 02:34 PM

Congratulations to your soon to be (perhaps) husband on setting the wheels in motion for your nuptials. May he sire many males and may he grow strong in the Lord all his days. May God richly bless him with wisdom so that his discipline is righteous in the eyes of Jesus, and may he find comfort in the realization that he has found a help meet, someone to do his bidding and raise his children in the way that God would have them be raised.

I am wondering if someone younger might have been more appropriate for him but I suppose you'll do, Esther - if he wants an older woman that is his business and not mine. Men, should we speak to him about it?


Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
Amen and Amen
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Samuel Hubbard Samuel Hubbard is offline
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-03-2015, 12:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry View Post
Congratulations to your soon to be (perhaps) husband on setting the wheels in motion for your nuptials. May he sire many males and may he grow strong in the Lord all his days. May God richly bless him with wisdom so that his discipline is righteous in the eyes of Jesus, and may he find comfort in the realization that he has found a help meet, someone to do his bidding and raise his children in the way that God would have them be raised.

I am wondering if someone younger might have been more appropriate for him but I suppose you'll do, Esther - if he wants an older woman that is his business and not mine. Men, should we speak to him about it?
Thank you, brother! If it was possible, I would have picked someone younger, but there aren't any available females of childbearing age who are younger than Esther. She is an excellent cook, a good teacher (just to my sister), and she has done a lovely job repairing my clothes that my mother and sister never got around to working on. Those factors, combined with her obedience, more than make up for the fact that a few of her childbearing years have been wasted. We will be married before the end of the year so we don't waste more of her childbearing years.
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Daisy Mae Johnson Daisy Mae Johnson is offline
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Jesus' eternal love Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-14-2015, 03:56 PM







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Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
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Default Re: I'm Engaged! - 08-15-2015, 03:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post


Don't get carried away now....


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
 

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