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  • #1

    Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

    nows, i unnerstand that the bible were wrote by some menfolk who had a direct lines to lord God so it almost like lord God wroted it Himselfs! . so why there be alotta yucky stuffs in the bible an alotta stuff that make no good sense?

    And Moses said before the LORD, Behold, I am of uncircumcised lips, and how shall Pharaoh hearken unto me? <--- that be exodus 6:30

    i reads an reads an reads that, an i thawt there no ways that verse meaned to be litteral . so i askeds some folk all abouts ole yucky lips , an they saids that maybee Mr.Moses were waxin poets about a speech impedmint. so why he not say that in the first places? i were real worrieds, i were thinkin he got lips that needs to be washed in a speshial ways everydays, an that he feelin real sads cuz in anchint Israels a uncircumcized lips were a unkosher lips an none of them heebroo ladys woulda gone on a dates wiv him an then Mr.Moses dieds all alone wiv unclean virgin lips

    anyways, i not mean to cause no offenses, but i be thinkin lord God coulda wroted that verse better, cuz He got the biggest brains in the whole entire universes an i shore he coulda thawt of somethin more classy
    Tags: circumcision, lips, moses
  • #2
    Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

    Good question...uncircumcized lips......what???
    sigpic
    Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

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    • #3
      Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

      Originally posted by Petal View Post
      nows, i unnerstand that the bible were wrote by some menfolk who had a direct lines to lord God so it almost like lord God wroted it Himselfs! . so why there be alotta yucky stuffs in the bible an alotta stuff that make no good sense?

      And Moses said before the LORD, Behold, I am of uncircumcised lips, and how shall Pharaoh hearken unto me? <--- that be exodus 6:30

      i reads an reads an reads that, an i thawt there no ways that verse meaned to be litteral . so i askeds some folk all abouts ole yucky lips , an they saids that maybee Mr.Moses were waxin poets about a speech impedmint. so why he not say that in the first places? i were real worrieds, i were thinkin he got lips that needs to be washed in a speshial ways everydays, an that he feelin real sads cuz in anchint Israels a uncircumcized lips were a unkosher lips an none of them heebroo ladys woulda gone on a dates wiv him an then Mr.Moses dieds all alone wiv unclean virgin lips

      anyways, i not mean to cause no offenses, but i be thinkin lord God coulda wroted that verse better, cuz He got the biggest brains in the whole entire universes an i shore he coulda thawt of somethin more classy
      Um....Miss Petal, this is a rather delicate matter to be discussing with the likes of you....Suffice to say, it wasn't a man's LIPS that God wanted circumcised. It was something a little further south. You don't need to worry your female head about such things.
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

        Originally posted by Petal View Post
        nows, i unnerstand that the bible were wrote by some menfolk who had a direct lines to lord God so it almost like lord God wroted it Himselfs! . so why there be alotta yucky stuffs in the bible an alotta stuff that make no good sense?

        And Moses said before the LORD, Behold, I am of uncircumcised lips, and how shall Pharaoh hearken unto me? <--- that be exodus 6:30

        i reads an reads an reads that, an i thawt there no ways that verse meaned to be litteral . so i askeds some folk all abouts ole yucky lips , an they saids that maybee Mr.Moses were waxin poets about a speech impedmint. so why he not say that in the first places? i were real worrieds, i were thinkin he got lips that needs to be washed in a speshial ways everydays, an that he feelin real sads cuz in anchint Israels a uncircumcized lips were a unkosher lips an none of them heebroo ladys woulda gone on a dates wiv him an then Mr.Moses dieds all alone wiv unclean virgin lips

        anyways, i not mean to cause no offenses, but i be thinkin lord God coulda wroted that verse better, cuz He got the biggest brains in the whole entire universes an i shore he coulda thawt of somethin more classy
        As far as I can tell, this verse, like ALL Bible verses, means exactly what it says. Moses never had the foreskin removed from his lips. What's so difficult to understand about that?
        O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



        God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

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        • #5
          Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

          Is Petal a homer or a negro (or worse: both)? I can't make heads nor tails of what it is saying! With all those colors, I am wont to think that it is a homo-sick-ual.
          Trump 2020: "For Real This Time"

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

            Originally posted by Mr.JonFishBreath85 View Post
            Is Petal a homer or a negro (or worse: both)? I can't make heads nor tails of what it is saying! With all those colors, I am wont to think that it is a homo-sick-ual.
            i no you are but what am i?

            Mr.JonFish, this here a bible threads, an your spirt of meanness is not appreshiateds! there no needs to make the funs of my spellin, i try my very bestest to spells good an i thinks all the colors are bootiful an the liddle smiley faces are freindly but it be wasteds on you!

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

              Silly negro. Have you looked into homer-reparative surgery lately? You sound like you have a lisp or big negro lips.
              Trump 2020: "For Real This Time"

              Comment

              • #8
                Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                Originally posted by Mr.StinkyFish85 View Post
                Silly negro. Have you looked into homer-reparative surgery lately? You sound like you have a lisp or big negro lips.
                i rebukes you for that slur on my delicate liddle true christian mouths! my lips been washed wiv the blood of the lambs, they been spirtually circumsizeds by lord God Himselfs

                you not needs to be castin them lookist stones, Mr.JonFishy, cuz you got a big fat chins your chin so bigs folk can see it from the moons


                your chin be be what demoteds Mr.Pluto
                Last edited by Petal; 10-06-2006, 04:06 AM.

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                  Johnfish85, I suggest you keep Negroid accusations against our Petal to yourself.
                  She is a True Christian™ (Pipsqueak) and is whiter than even you.
                  Any more of this Teenage behaviour and I shall have to rebuke you with hundreds of nasty points against your name.

                  You have been warned!!

                  Please calm down Petal, nasty man won't harm you.

                  Sister Talitha

                  Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


                  HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
                  being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41


                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                    Mr Fish, I'm not even goning to warn you. You have been rebuked in the name of God Almighty. We will not tolerate groundless accusations!
                    Matthew:
                    5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                    5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                    10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                    10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                    sigpic

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                    • #11
                      Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                      My most sincere apologies, both to God and to Petal! I was overcome by my own fallible human suspicions, and knew not what I did. Such a Godly person should never be mistaken for a negroid. My most humble apologies to all offended. My hands have offended me, and now I must go deal with that......
                      Trump 2020: "For Real This Time"

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                        A nice healthy love-offering to Jesus via LBC would go along way towards the forgiveness and peace of mind you seek. Hit that Paypal button now.
                        Who Will Jesus Damn?

                        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                          My penitence offering has been submitted. May Jesus (and Petal and other True Christians(tm)) look kindly upon my offering and grant me forgiveness (via Landover Baptists Pastors) for my wrong-doings.
                          Trump 2020: "For Real This Time"

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                            My most sincere apologies, both to God and to Petal! I was overcome by my own fallible human suspicions, and knew not what I did. Such a Godly person should never be mistaken for a negroid. My most humble apologies to all offended. My hands have offended me, and now I must go deal with that......
                            A person who claims to know everything about science is surely dumb enough to insult Petal the godly cat. Why? Well, it's obvious, isn't it.

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Re: Mr.Moses badmouth his badmouth

                              Originally posted by robert12345 View Post
                              A person who claims to know everything about science is surely dumb enough to insult Petal the godly cat. Why? Well, it's obvious, isn't it.
                              Petal isn't a cat you fool. She is a cat fancier. She is a just a bit too passionate about it, that's all. What's a matter, you such a jerk that you have something against people with health problems?

                              Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

                              Hot Must ReadThreads!


                              Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

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