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Reload this Page What is your sexual orientation?
Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you).

View Poll Results: What's your sexual orientation?
Decent heterosexual 179 94.71%
Self-loathing, God-hating heterosexual rebelling against Jesus 10 5.29%
Voters: 189. You may not vote on this poll

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Default What is your sexual orientation? - 07-31-2008, 02:57 AM

Are you a decent heterosexual, or are you so mired in sin and hatred for God that you're a heterosexual who has chosen to rebel against nature?


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1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 07-31-2008, 03:22 AM

Pretty decent hetero I do believe. Don't get much action anymore though. After 8 kids, the equipment just stopped working. God's way of saying we had reached the perfect family size for us. Praise the Lord.

And it gives me much more time to search the interwebs for deviant evil chink porn to catologue and send out to other Christians so we can all see just who has google ads at these sites and boycott them.

I try to do my part.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 07-31-2008, 03:37 AM

I'm a normal God fearing True Christian™ Republican American Man. 100% normal here, thank you Jesus!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 07-31-2008, 05:38 PM

I don't worship idols, so according to Romans ch. 1, there's no reason for God to turn me into a nancy boy.


This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.

Questions to ask liberal "Christians"Things that the Bible doesn't sayTolerance

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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-04-2008, 08:40 PM

100% normal hetero here, Sister Jenny! Er, I mean Sister Mary Maria!

I'm surprised that Andrew Watkins hasn't responded to your poll. Wonder why?


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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-05-2008, 09:30 PM

I miss the good old days when there was no talk about "sexual orientation". You were either a man or an effeminate sissy, but you wouldn't dare admit to being a homer where I grew up. The world is so upside down right now that it has become acceptable, and even trendy, to be openly homersexual, and there is something very wrong about that.

As far as the polling goes, I am heterosexual though.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-06-2008, 01:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Eugene Hackwith View Post
I miss the good old days when there was no talk about "sexual orientation". You were either a man or an effeminate sissy, but you wouldn't dare admit to being a homer where I grew up. The world is so upside down right now that it has become acceptable, and even trendy, to be openly homersexual, and there is something very wrong about that.
I blame the Clintons.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Eugene Hackwith View Post
As far as the polling goes, I am heterosexual though.
Glad to hear the good news, Brother.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-06-2008, 03:28 AM

I'm not sure what Sister M&Ms means. I am a male, so my sexual orientation is on top.

This entire thread is confusing. Men on top. women on the bottom in submission. There ARE no other 'orientations'.


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"God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-06-2008, 08:57 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
I'm surprised that Andrew Watkins hasn't responded to your poll.
Look again.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-06-2008, 11:19 AM

I don't quite understand the point of this poll. Surely sodomites shouldn't be allowed to vote?


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-06-2008, 04:03 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mister Brasil View Post
Look again.
Are we sure that wasn't Tally the Ho, or Ugly Angry Lezbean, or OneQueerVoice?


Bible boring? Nonsense!
Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-06-2008, 04:13 PM

I was made in the image of The Lord in all respects... save perhaps that I claim no omniscient, omnipresent or resurrection powers (save for that at the second coming) but I will admit to being ineffable sometimes.

(I recall an incident many years back when, one early evening at a church social, I danced with more than three young ladies! I admit that it was difficult dancing with a chaperone at the same time but things were altogether more civilized in those days.)





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Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 11:09 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Eugene Hackwith View Post
I miss the good old days when there was no talk about "sexual orientation". You were either a man or an effeminate sissy, but you wouldn't dare admit to being a homer where I grew up. The world is so upside down right now that it has become acceptable, and even trendy, to be openly homersexual, and there is something very wrong about that.

As far as the polling goes, I am heterosexual though.

This post holds wisdom and truth.

To ask what anyone's sexual orientation is is a waste of words.

We are all either a Man, a Woman,or a homolezzer degenerate.

There is no need for sub-categories and deviant multiple choices.
Men lay with women,
women lay with men.
the rest are not an orientation...
they are degenerate abominations.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 12:52 PM

You are either a normal Heterosexual or you are doomed to an Eternity in Hell.
You can't argue with The Bible.

Homo's are subnormal and an abomination.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 01:49 PM

Does Hitoshi count as a sexual Orientation?


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 04:06 PM

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Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
Does Hitoshi count as a sexual Orientation?

An interesting question, Brother.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 04:36 PM

I get my sexual orientation from the Bible, of course, that illuminates us in such a beautiful way, in so many passages, and as far as I am concerned, I am as normal as can be, straight as an arrow! although I must admit I do not fulfil Paul's ideal in Corinthians of complete and absolute chastity and celibacy before marriage, but that was before I became a True Christian™; darn those harlots of the Tropical Babylon that is Colombia! But I know Jesus has forgiven my indiscretions, especially after my recent tithing, and I can only hope and pray for enlightenment in that aspect. It is, in fact, one of the main prayer themes I have when I go over to sister BTB and Pastor Zeke's house, during our usual Biblical geology discussions.


Bringing Geology back to Christ!

I believe Dr. Hovind to be completely innocent of the alleged crime of "tax evasion", and furthermore believe Hovind's 10 year sentence to be patently unjust and based upon an effort to silence his ministry.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 04:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Santiago Solo View Post
It is, in fact, one of the main prayer themes I have when I go over to sister BTB and Pastor Zeke's house, during our usual Biblical geology discussions.
Good old Biblical geology. Of all the fascinating topics connected with God's word, the things God has to say about rocks must among the most interesting. Praise Jesus.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 04:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
Good old Biblical geology. Of all the fascinating topics connected with God's word, the things God has to say about rocks must among the most interesting. Praise Jesus.
Indeed, Brother, there is nothing more thrilling than discussing with Pastor Zeke about the hardness of the different minerals, the violence of volcanic eruptions, and their emanations, or how mountains get erected, and so forth. It is quite stimulating, to say the least...


Bringing Geology back to Christ!

I believe Dr. Hovind to be completely innocent of the alleged crime of "tax evasion", and furthermore believe Hovind's 10 year sentence to be patently unjust and based upon an effort to silence his ministry.
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Default Re: What is your sexual orientation? - 08-17-2008, 05:28 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
Good old Biblical geology. Of all the fascinating topics connected with God's word, the things God has to say about rocks must among the most interesting. Praise Jesus.
It's all good. I love discussing Biblically correct entomology with my students, too.


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