MEET CHRISTIAN SINGLES! Who knows? The love of your life might be here! All the single men are GODLY and all the single ladies are virgins...........for the most part. |
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 27
Join Date: May 2010
|
|
Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-11-2010, 07:27 AM
Hello all.
My name is Ruth Newberry, formerly Bell-Forsyth.
I am 22, soon to be 23, and I have two strong, bible-loving sons.
Recently, my husband told me he was a homer, and though I tried to cure him, he wouldn't so much as listen to me. So after a long search for the answers in my prayer closet, here I am.
As I have many good child-bearing years ahead of me, it would be only right to re-marry and create more Soldiers for Christ, would it not?
So I'm taking applicants!
As to my vital statistics; 38, 24, 36...these are the sizes of my favourite pie dishes. I like catering to a crowd!
I keep my home spit-spot, you'd be very hardpressed to find even a speck of dust on any surface. And as soon as my husband was to step through the door, he would find his coat and shoes off, a warm robe and slippers on, and dinner ready.
I'm not one to be lax in my womanly duties.
Well, I'll leave it at that. I don't yet have Private Message facilities on here, so if all inquiries could be drafted in here, that would be lovely.
Thank you all for your time, and praise the Lord.
Ruth.
|
|
America's Most Fair and Balanced Judge
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 2,611
Join Date: Jun 2009
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-11-2010, 01:02 PM
Tempting, very tempting.
Since you haven't shared your location with us, it would be nice to know if your living within, say, 50 miles of Freehold.
The reason I ask this is because should I want to come to court you, I have only a moped for transportation and any distance beyond 50 miles would be an ordeal.
If the distance is more than 50 miles perhaps we can meet somewhere in the middle.
I have wide knowledge of the "budget" lodgings throughout the area having spent considerable amounts of time in them while conducting business transactions.
Many of the places offer diversions for those slow times in conversation. Their movie libraries are quite varied depending upon your preferences.
Please get back to me as quickly as possible as my calendar is nearly full from all the opportunities available on Craig's List.
The Honorable HTannor (Pro NRA, Anti-Homer Marriage), Judge, Freehold Supreme Court
"Credo elvem etiam vivere"
|
|
Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
|
|
Posts: 13
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Ohio
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-12-2010, 01:37 AM
Ruth
Just a couple questions, do you have a job? how are you supporting you children now?
Don't you think it would be more important to put fourth the effort to improve yourself and support your children than to worry about finding a man and making more children?
I applaud your hunt for true love but have faith that God will send you a man, if you are meant to have another right at this time and he will be the right person to lead you and your family in your walk of faith. But if not have faith that God will give you strength and grace for the journey He has you on now.
He knows the plans He has for you, ones of good and not evil.
There is a season for everything under heaven.
Best of Luck
Blonde
|
|
Biblical Poet, Warrior and Scholar Biblical Black Belt Jr. Pastor
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 6,232
Join Date: Dec 2008
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-12-2010, 01:42 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by blonde
Ruth
Just a couple questions, do you have a job? how are you supporting you children now?
Don't you think it would be more important to put fourth the effort to improve yourself and support your children than to worry about finding a man and making more children?
I applaud your hunt for true love but have faith that God will send you a man, if you are meant to have another right at this time and he will be the right person to lead you and your family in your walk of faith. But if not have faith that God will give you strength and grace for the journey He has you on now.
He knows the plans He has for you, ones of good and not evil.
There is a season for everything under heaven.
Best of Luck
Blonde
|
What is this feminist garbage? A woman supporting herself?
|
#63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
|
|
Posts: 6,234
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Freehold, Ia
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-12-2010, 02:10 AM
She did not say one single thing about pie, I will take a pass
|
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 27
Join Date: May 2010
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-12-2010, 04:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by HTannor
Tempting, very tempting.
Since you haven't shared your location with us, it would be nice to know if your living within, say, 50 miles of Freehold.
The reason I ask this is because should I want to come to court you, I have only a moped for transportation and any distance beyond 50 miles would be an ordeal.
If the distance is more than 50 miles perhaps we can meet somewhere in the middle.
I have wide knowledge of the "budget" lodgings throughout the area having spent considerable amounts of time in them while conducting business transactions.
Many of the places offer diversions for those slow times in conversation. Their movie libraries are quite varied depending upon your preferences.
Please get back to me as quickly as possible as my calendar is nearly full from all the opportunities available on Craig's List.
|
I, unfortunately, live in Australia. Be that as it may, I would happily fly over to make things easier.
I'm warmed deep inside at the thought of engaging in deep prayer with a godly man such as yourself. <3
To Miss Blonde: The courts have decided that my ex husband is to pay child support and alimony. Not that it is really any of your business; I'm not a lezbean, after all.
To Heathen_Basher: I know, so very silly!
To Mr Dewitt: Gosh, Mr Dewitt, I'm not sure why you peeked your head into my personal - I was certain you had your sights set on the lovely Sister Phebe! Rightly so, as well. As, with age, her pie is superior to mine. She and I have been swapping recipes though, so I hope to improve vastly in a short amount of time.
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 67
Join Date: May 2010
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-31-2010, 06:31 AM
What exactly is this "Pie" you people are talking about?
|
|
Winning Souls in his Winnebago
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,893
Join Date: May 2010
Location: travelling the heartland in my Winnebago.
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-31-2010, 06:40 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SticksAndStones
What exactly is this "Pie" you people are talking about?
|
She is talking of good Christian fruit pies, what are you talking about friend?
1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 67
Join Date: May 2010
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-31-2010, 06:48 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Benedict A. Davis
She is talking of good Christian fruit pies, what are you talking about friend?
|
Women have a lot of delicious stuff to offer, Pie is just one of the many things. They supply mouth-watering orange-watermelon fruit salads.
|
|
Winning Souls in his Winnebago
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 3,893
Join Date: May 2010
Location: travelling the heartland in my Winnebago.
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-31-2010, 06:52 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SticksAndStones
Women have a lot of delicious stuff to offer, Pie is just one of the many things. They supply mouth-watering orange-watermelon fruit salads.
|
They wouldn't call it pie then, would they?
1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
|
Fourm Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 9,264
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: On my way to Paradise
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-31-2010, 06:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SticksAndStones
What exactly is this "Pie" you people are talking about?
|
Just proof how deprived liebral children really are, poor guy doesn't even know what pie is.
Even if a liebral woman does decide to "make a pie" it usually involves plopping canned dog slop pie filling into a frozen pie crust.
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 600
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cowering in fear of Australia's Godless Prime Minister
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
07-31-2010, 07:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SticksAndStones
What exactly is this "Pie" you people are talking about?
|
What is there not to understand about pie?
I don't think you're very bright.
What's your operating system? Windows ? OS X ? Mine's JesOS!
|
|
Unsaved trash
|
|
Posts: 27
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Denmark (Moving to Freehold, God bless)
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
08-04-2010, 04:18 AM
I can’t believe this! You’re admitting that your slutty ways already turned one straight Christian man into a flaming homosexual, gave birth to two sons of a queer and now you’re looking for another man – without your fathers permission?
Is this for real?
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,590
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Koala Kountry
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
08-04-2010, 06:48 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dionysos
I can’t believe this! You’re admitting that your slutty ways already turned one straight Christian man into a flaming homosexual, gave birth to two sons of a queer and now you’re looking for another man – without your fathers permission?
Is this for real?
|
Are you her ex husband?
I see from your intro thread that are a flaming homo.
If you came here to seek revenge on Sister Ruth then I think you better leave.
2 Chronicles 7:14
14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land Australia.
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 217
Join Date: Aug 2010
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
08-04-2010, 07:18 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by HTannor
Tempting, very tempting.
Since you haven't shared your location with us, it would be nice to know if your living within, say, 50 miles of Freehold.
The reason I ask this is because should I want to come to court you, I have only a moped for transportation and any distance beyond 50 miles would be an ordeal.
If the distance is more than 50 miles perhaps we can meet somewhere in the middle.
I have wide knowledge of the "budget" lodgings throughout the area having spent considerable amounts of time in them while conducting business transactions.
Many of the places offer diversions for those slow times in conversation. Their movie libraries are quite varied depending upon your preferences.
Please get back to me as quickly as possible as my calendar is nearly full from all the opportunities available on Craig's List.
|
How old are you HTannor? Like 50 or 60? What exactly is tempting about this? I could understand if you wanted to support her like a father and wanted to send her money, in a completely platonic way. Is that what you are thinking about?
sas
|
|
Unsaved trash
|
|
Posts: 27
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Denmark (Moving to Freehold, God bless)
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
08-04-2010, 07:43 AM
God bless you Sister Charli
It’s true that I used to suffer from that terrible disease, but last year I got attacked by a group of righteous people who almost punched and kicked the demon out of me, God bless.
Now, thanks to the Bible and cold showers, I’m working to find my way into the bright light that shines from the only truth – I’m sure I’ll see you when I get there
|
|
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
|
|
Posts: 217
Join Date: Aug 2010
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
08-04-2010, 08:11 AM
In my opinion, homosexuality is an expression of hate. Stop hating and the desire for the act will go away completely. In order to stop hate, you need to stop the other six deadly sins. When you do that, you will be saved.
God bless,
Jesper
|
|
True Christian™
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 1,590
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Koala Kountry
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
08-04-2010, 08:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dionysos
God bless you Sister Charli
It’s true that I used to suffer from that terrible disease, but last year I got attacked by a group of righteous people who almost punched and kicked the demon out of me, God bless.
Now, thanks to the Bible and cold showers, I’m working to find my way into the bright light that shines from the only truth – I’m sure I’ll see you when I get there
|
Hallelujah.
Praise Jesus for sending those Godly folk to save your ass!
2 Chronicles 7:14
14 If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land Australia.
|
|
Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
08-04-2010, 05:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by self_aware_sinner
In my opinion, homosexuality is an expression of hate. Stop hating and the desire for the act will go away completely. In order to stop hate, you need to stop the other six deadly sins. When you do that, you will be saved.
|
Before saying any more about the seven deadly sins, please read this.
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
|
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 27
Join Date: May 2010
|
|
Re: Good, Christian lady seeks STRAIGHT husband. -
10-03-2010, 09:21 AM
Oh, I'm sorry everyone!
I know I've been inexcusably absent, but one of my sons told me he wanted to dance, God forbid! His father's influence no doubt. I was spanking the Gay out of him, when the other came to his rescue! After some good, Godly advice from Brother Harold Porter and further advice from Pastor Levi, I have invested in a fabulous disciplinary device!
I believe in common parlance it's called a tazer, and it does wonders! A few shocks and they're sent off to their seperate prayer closets to apologise for their terrible choices.
Thank you, though, for all giving me such wonderful advice in here!
Praise the Lord for guiding me to you all,
Ruth.
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|