Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > The introduction forum
Reload this Page Hello...
The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#121)
Old
Miss April's Avatar
Miss April Miss April is offline
Landover's Version of Carrie Prejean
Forum Member

How dumb can you get? A for Effort One Year/1000 posts

 
Posts: 685
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: I live in York PA
Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:39 AM

Claire the catfreak Troll Why don't you and loser friends go troll some other site cause your not welcame here anymore Ps Everybody is Right your Cats will burn in hell forever and so will you with the devil trying too rape you Over and ever again it will naver Stop Ejoy The fire Claire!
Reply With Quote
(#122)
Old
Mad Prophet Helmholtz's Avatar
Mad Prophet Helmholtz Mad Prophet Helmholtz is offline
Recovering Outpatient From The Landover Rehabilitation Unit
Forum Member

True Heterosexual™ Ex-Gay Parking Lot Tither Real American™ Caution - Poster is Crazy One Year/1000 posts

 
Posts: 666
Join Date: May 2009
Location: A Hotel in California
Mad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:40 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
And if I do leave, how do I know you won't post my information anyway?
Prof. Bessemer is a good True Christian™ with outstanding morals. He gave you his word. Now don't push your luck...


SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

Hosea 9:7
The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.
Reply With Quote
(#123)
Old
Spaghettilover's Avatar
Spaghettilover Spaghettilover is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
 
Posts: 1
Join Date: Jun 2009
Spaghettilover is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:41 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
And if I do leave, how do I know you won't post my information anyway?
You don't... Leave while you can Claire!!!
Reply With Quote
(#124)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:41 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
And if I do leave, how do I know you won't post my information anyway?
YOU DON'T!!!

But if you apologize for being a lying troll NOW, I swear before God that I will reveal no more of your personal info.

But do it quickly!


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#125)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Spaghettilover View Post
You don't... Leave while you can Claire!!!
The tard is back. Can we get a Mod to ban this one again?


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#126)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
The tard is back. Can we get a Mod to ban this one again?
That was quick! See Claire, we really don't suffer fools gladly.

Apology ready hon?


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#127)
Old
Mad Prophet Helmholtz's Avatar
Mad Prophet Helmholtz Mad Prophet Helmholtz is offline
Recovering Outpatient From The Landover Rehabilitation Unit
Forum Member

True Heterosexual™ Ex-Gay Parking Lot Tither Real American™ Caution - Poster is Crazy One Year/1000 posts

 
Posts: 666
Join Date: May 2009
Location: A Hotel in California
Mad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious RaptureMad Prophet Helmholtz has discarded the shackles of sin and is ready to participate in the Glorious Rapture
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
The tard is back. Can we get a Mod to ban this one again?
That was quick. Gotta love housekeeping around here!


SPACESHIP JESUS appeared to me in Astronaut form when I was staying in a motel in 1974. He then told me the TRUTH about our world and what illusions the SATANIC ALLIANCE uses to control us! To this day, I still receive SPACESHIP RADIO SIGNALS INTO MY BRAIN. Absolve yourself of your limited Matrix existence.

Hosea 9:7
The days of visitation are come, the days of recompence are come; Israel shall know it: the prophet is a fool, the spiritual man is mad, for the multitude of thine iniquity, and the great hatred.
Reply With Quote
(#128)
Old
Claire's Avatar
Claire Claire is offline
Unsaved trash
 
 
Posts: 51
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Massachusetts
Claire is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.Claire is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:47 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
YOU DON'T!!!

But if you apologize for being a lying troll NOW, I swear before God that I will reveal no more of your personal info.

But do it quickly!

Fine, I'm sorry.


But I would have you know, that the head of every woman is Christ; and the head of the man is the woman; and the head of Christ is God. - Corinthians 11:3
Reply With Quote
(#129)
Old
Pastor Ezekiel's Avatar
Pastor Ezekiel Pastor Ezekiel is offline
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
 

One Year/1000 posts Ribfest '09 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College Saved 1 Year Long service medal, 3rd class Christian Love True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Real American™ True Heterosexual™ Tithing Manager 2008 Witch Hunt Award Gunfest '09 Senior Pastor Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus The Lord’s Witness Wound Home Schooled Punched the most queers TC Bravery Protected by JESUS Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Jailed for JESUS Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Teabag Patriot 20,000 posts Friend of Jesus 2010 Witch Hunt Award Flat Earth 50,000 posts Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Mission to Japan Pro-Life Mission to Las Vegas True Christian Provider™ award True Scientist™ Eats the Most Pork 2011 Witch Hunt Award Outreach preacher Special Mission (North Korea) Golden Bear Award True Republican Batman Shooting Survivor Sons of Liberty Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! WisconSIN Shooting survivor Proud Niglet Sponsorer Truck Stop Ministry Member Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club In Love With Zeke Bear Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Man of the Year True Christian Hotrodder Paula Deen Negro Support Group Gator Touched by Jesus 75,000 posts Man of the Year Babysitter 2014 Witch Hunt Award Stamp of Approval Mission to Korea Trump of GOD Uber Angels Driver Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Roper Crossburn Donald Trump 2016! Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off 2015 Witch Hunt Award Pastor Ezekiel Golden Bear Award Mission Long service medal, 2nd class Aardvark Asked questions later Heart of compassion Crown of Righteousness The Crown of Crowns Crown of Glory Crown of Incorruptibility Crown of Rejoicing Crown of Life BFF of Jesus Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Probing for Jesus Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Hold re-election 2020 for Jesus Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Mission to the Philippines Clorox Cured Me QAnon Storm Chaser Anti-Biden British Royalty

 
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:47 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
Fine, I'm sorry.
And? Do you renounce satan and all his works? Come on, don't stop now!


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
Reply With Quote
(#130)
Old
Miss April's Avatar
Miss April Miss April is offline
Landover's Version of Carrie Prejean
Forum Member

How dumb can you get? A for Effort One Year/1000 posts

 
Posts: 685
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: I live in York PA
Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.Miss April has got mom and a couple of family members to click the rep button.
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:50 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
Fine, I'm sorry.
Good freak Now go away and don't came back!
Reply With Quote
(#131)
Old
Professor Bessemer's Avatar
Professor Bessemer Professor Bessemer is offline
Professor of Creation Science at Landover University
Double PhD. Theomathematics, Racial Science
Returned from 10 year South Africa Expedition
True Christian™

1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ Ex-Gay True Heterosexual™ Public Awareness Medal Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year Born again virgin Ex-Slut True Republican Guns, Guts and GLORY! True Christian™ Eunuch. True Christian Hotrodder Pro-Life Flat Earth Saved 10 Years Mission Long service medal, 3rd class 2011 Witch Hunt Award Doctor Ex-Masturbator Real American™ Porn Resistant BFF of Jesus Christian Love TC Bravery Teabag Patriot The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Ex-Mary Worshipper Ribfest '09 Nuts for JESUS! True Christian Nerd Prayer Warrior Gunfest '14 Stamp of Approval Aardvark Cup of Jesus Kirk Cameron Fan Club

 
Posts: 2,991
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Returned from studying the negro in Africa.
Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Professor Bessemer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 02:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
Fine, I'm sorry.
And as I am a man of my word, I will reveal nothing else. But let that be a lesson to you, young lady!

Trolling will lead you to Hell eventually and to who knows where here on earth.


Professor of Creation Science at Landover Baptist University



Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!

Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21
Reply With Quote
(#132)
Old
Bethany Covington's Avatar
Bethany Covington Bethany Covington is offline
Woman, but possibly Saved®
Forum Member
 
Posts: 71
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Council Bluffs, Iowa
Bethany Covington is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.Bethany Covington is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.Bethany Covington is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: Hello... - 06-12-2009, 12:57 PM

Isn't it a crime against humanity when one young "lady," and I say that with a smirk, can take a wife and mother like me away found her baking and other wifely duties? I know stoning is a bit harsh so can we set up a public whipping, lets say at Sundays service and punish this young lady? I sure Brand and all the other men would love to hear her squeal like a pig as her tender young bottom gets spanked. We ladies can bake cookies while you men folk do your Godly work.


Yours in Christ,
Bethany Angelica Covington

Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved