Straight 4 Jesus! (Back Door Christians) At LBC, we will cure your perversion of choice (even if we have to stone you). |
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Senior Pastor Ex-liberal; converted to True Christianity™ Always Biblically correct
True Christian™
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Posts: 10,667
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 13706 Levite's Sojourn Terr., Gibeah Hill, Freehold, Iowa
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
04-30-2009, 01:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by no1steelerfan
well i believe that you have never held a conversation with jesus concerning aids, i would much rather tell people they are safe and that they need not worry about aids. plus i'm not going to say what jesus wants because i can not speak on his behalf, and the same goes for you.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by no1steelerfan
ok ok, matthew 7:1-2 read it, you should be familar with the bible. you'll go to hell with the people you judge. it's not our place to tell people how they live, even if it is immoral. it's just not our place
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So you say you cannot speak on Our Lord's behalf, and in the next breath, you presume to do so (by misquoting Scripture, by the way). Okey dokey .
This church is dedicated to preaching True Christianity™ and the King James Bible exactly as they are, with no alterations to make them more politically correct for modern liberals. If you think that we've misquoted or twisted Scripture or quoted any verse out of context, please explain in detail how we've done so. Otherwise, if what you read on this site offends you, then you're offended by Almighty God and His Word, not by us.
Questions to ask liberal "Christians" ✞ Things that the Bible doesn't say ✞ Tolerance
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Landover Habilitation and Therapy Unit (For those unfit to mix with the normal public)
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Posts: 17
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Alaskan Tundra (you others live in hotter places right?)
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-05-2009, 02:50 PM
29. Anal sex with Nobar King
" Come sit on uncle Nobar's lap
and let me tell you a story."
Can't even imagine what that story is like.
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-06-2009, 12:21 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kotex.Thompson
29. Anal sex with Nobar King
" Come sit on uncle Nobar's lap
and let me tell you a story."
Can't even imagine what that story is like.
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Now you're just being mean. What did I ever do to you?
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Jesus's Favorite Nurse
Forum Member
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Posts: 973
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Landover Basement
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-06-2009, 12:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King
Now you're just being mean. What did I ever do to you?
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I think the little homer is upset over what you won't do to him, Brother!
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Moderator Arms Dealer for CHRIST Hands folded for Jesus
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Posts: 5,251
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: On the Straight and Narrow (Earthly location: Freehold, Iowa)
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-08-2009, 12:21 AM
Koty, I am going to ask you a question and I want you to be completely honest with me.
Are you compiling a list of our True Christian manly men and where they live so that you can hunt them down and rape them mercilessly? Because that's what it looks like to me.
Are you infected with the AIDS? I know that you gays get some kind of sick thrill out of spreading your AIDS all over the place. Do you eat Skittles?
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 53
Join Date: Feb 2009
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-15-2009, 09:54 AM
It's really a terrible thing to see in comments as these ones i've seen here that the world wide known myth of North American stupidity is true.
To think that god would do such a thing as to creat a terrible desease that killd a countnless number people around the world is just the gratest confirmation that finishes a myth and stablishes a truth.
If god has created Aids he sertainly has not done that only for gay people he's done that for everyone. It's a nongender related virus.
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Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance Christ's Rottweiler
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Posts: 22,744
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-15-2009, 10:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Manny
[...]It's a nongender related virus.
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Nope, it's spread by queers, everyone knows that (except you apparently.)
God said homersexurality is an abomination and now we see yet another reason. Proof of God.
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 1
Join Date: May 2009
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch AIDS! -
05-30-2009, 11:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire
- Headphones: never sit around listening to music through headphones unless they are your own, you bought them and you’ve never let them out of your sight.
- Mosquitoes: in homersexyurl districts (e.g. California) mosquitoes will suck blood from gays and inject you with it.
- Drinking from a public water fountain: drooling homers leave saliva behind and you drink it!
- Earrings: (pierced only) Women –never ever wear a homer’s earring it's like using his needle!
- Showers: droplets of water carry the AIDS germs, you breathe them in and ‘bang’ - fast train to the graveyard!
- Towels, homers rub themselves all over with these, then you rub yourself… stands to reason!
- Food, No one should ever touch your food – if a homer does touch it, the sweat and fat from the skin (crawling with AIDS germs) will get you.
- Public transport: As AIDS gets bad, the immune system fails and head lice and other things appear. Invariably the Homer can’t afford a car, so he travels on public transport, leaving behind him a trail of insect parasites gorged with his blood (see mosquitoes above.)
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Now I love a good gay bashing like an upright True Christian should!
However I do believe in the Bible, the One True Book, that it says you shall not lie or you will go to Hell for all eternity and burn like you should (Revelations 21:8)
Gods gift to all gaybo's is the AID's.
Aids is a virus is therefore different to a bacteria.
Aids cannot be caught as easily as you think - in fact everything apart from anal sex with a gaybo won't get you aids. Do you think God would make it that easy to get if you were an upstanding Christian just doing your own thing? No! God loves you and doesn't want you to have AIDs, unless you're a gaybo in which case he wants you to get it!
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch AIDS! -
05-30-2009, 11:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by toadcat
Now I love a good gay bashing like an upright True Christian should!
However I do believe in the Bible, the One True Book, that it says you shall not lie or you will go to Hell for all eternity and burn like you should (Revelations 21:8)
Gods gift to all gaybo's is the AID's.
Aids is a virus is therefore different to a bacteria.
Aids cannot be caught as easily as you think - in fact everything apart from anal sex with a gaybo won't get you aids. Do you think God would make it that easy to get if you were an upstanding Christian just doing your own thing? No! God loves you and doesn't want you to have AIDs, unless you're a gaybo in which case he wants you to get it!
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You are 100% wrong, trollboy. ANYONE can get the AIDS, because God is the one in charge of handing it out. Plenty of queers get it, but it sure isn't only queers. Haven't you ever read the Holy Bible??
When really bad things happen (like you get eaten by wild beasts, get killed in war, get sick and die, etc.), then you'll know that it was God that did it to you.
Quote:
Ezekiel 14:13 Son of man, when the land sinneth against me by trespassing grievously, then will I stretch out mine hand upon it, and will break the staff of the bread thereof, and will send famine upon it, and will cut off man and beast from it:
14:15 If I cause noisome beasts to pass through the land, and they spoil it, so that it be desolate, that no man may pass through because of the beasts:
14:17 Or if I bring a sword upon that land, and say, Sword, go through the land; so that I cut off man and beast from it:
14:19 Or if I send a pestilence into that land, and pour out my fury upon it in blood, to cut off from it man and beast:
14:21 For thus saith the Lord GOD; How much more when I send my four sore judgments upon Jerusalem, the sword, and the famine, and the noisome beast, and the pestilence, to cut off from it man and beast?
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Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 1
Join Date: May 2009
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-31-2009, 02:31 PM
Pastor Ezekiel....you have got to be one of the most brainwashed people in the world....i honestly pity you...see what you guys did in this post is not display 101 ways to get aids...you just displayed 101 reasons why you are all RETARDED, getting aids through the air? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? SUPER-AIDS? WTF IS THAT?? IS IT SUPER, DOES IT SUPER KILL YOU?? the only way you get aids is either it was passed down from your parents aka born w/ it and nothing you can do about it...or you have sex w/ someone who has it...THATS IT PEOPLE GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK HEADS, its not just a homo disease either btw, you christian retards can get it just the same as they can, it dont matter what sexual orientation you are if you sleep with someone that has it you get it its as simple as that..the lesson here today is you people clearly all need some serious help...think about what you guys have been saying...aids going through the air? if that were the case wouldnt everyone in the world already have it.....the wind on this planet goes all the way around it doesnt just go one way and disappear WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE PEOPLE
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Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
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Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-31-2009, 03:18 PM
You'd better not be spreading your queer GRID with that post.
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-31-2009, 03:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LMFAOWOW
the only way you get aids is either it was passed down from your parents aka born w/ it and nothing you can do about it...or you have sex w/ someone who has it...THATS IT PEOPLE GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK HEADS
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More hateful atheist lies and propaganda. Is it the AIDS that made you so stupid? Or was it shooting the junk that did it?
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 2
Join Date: May 2009
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
05-31-2009, 10:20 PM
ur all retarded god hates you and you are going to hell, and you are all rednecks piffle you all. im not gay btw you people just make the human race sound retarded...
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Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58 Christ's Guardian
True Christian™
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
06-01-2009, 12:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LMFAOWOW
WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE PEOPLE
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Who are these coffee colored people and why would I ever want to smell them?
May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
03-09-2011, 08:46 PM
You can also get the AIDS from fruit at the grocery store.
Gays like to "Knock" on melons or squeeze fruits to test for ripeness, but I know they are just trying to spread their gay disease.
Gays, like fruits and probably have not washed their hands because they are vile perverts.
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
08-29-2013, 11:45 PM
Add one more to your list, Brother. Pastor Pat Robertson has uncovered the Gay Death Ring, a most vicious tool used by the Homosexuals in San Francisco. With this ring, they cut the fingers of people with whom they shake hands, ensuring the gay demons flow right into their bloodstream. I thank the Good LORD for this kind of investigative reporting.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Serving Jesus
True Christian™
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Posts: 4,470
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Godly Texas, Besieged by Papist Idol Worshippers
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
08-30-2013, 02:25 AM
I have felt for the longest time that the Lord God is just waiting until Nancy Pelosi is in San Francisco and Maxine Waters is in Oakland at the same time so that He can send that abomination sliding into the Pacific Ocean. That whole God cursed area is ripe for punishment.
I believe God hates Californians even more than He hates the French, if that is possible
God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 19
Join Date: Aug 2013
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
08-30-2013, 12:08 PM
I've worked in the healthcare field for several years and there are only 3 ways to contract AIDS. Blood, vaginal secreations (entering the body) and seamen (entering the body)
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Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,223
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Thong-infested Florida©
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
08-30-2013, 12:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ImBuddhist
I've worked in the healthcare field for several years and there are only 3 ways to contract AIDS. Blood, vaginal secreations (entering the body) and seamen (entering the body)
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Queersexuality is definitely a problem in the modern-day Navy.
Thanks Obama.
YiC,
Zech
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Anti La Leche League Organizer
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,807
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: VT--the Green Mountain State
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Re: AIDS : THE FACTS - 101 ways YOU could catch the AIDS! -
08-30-2013, 12:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ImBuddhist
I've worked in the healthcare field for several years and there are only 3 ways to contract AIDS. Blood, vaginal secreations (entering the body) and seamen (entering the body)
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You should read this entire thread; it's very enlightening.
I totally agree with your comments about sailors.
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