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Christ's Love Messenger
True Christian™
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Posts: 5,978
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: A road of rocks and glass
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Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote! -
08-19-2007, 11:38 AM
A piece of Christ's trash, appropriately named "Clown Boy", is claiming he has seen the light and is requesting removal from Landover's Quarantine section. While I feel Mr. Clown's repentance lacks sincerity; I did tell him I would put his apology in the main forum and allow our members to have a democratic vote.
Pubic opinion will not guarantee outcome. As always, the final decision will be Christ's.
The following is from Clown Boy...
Quote:
Dear Baby Jesus...I have sinned on many occasions including: Assault, petty theft, swearing, taking your Holy Name in vain, insulting the LBC members, beating Matt up, locking Matt in a literal closet, drinking, having orgies with my wife before she was my wife, grand-theft auto, blowing up cars, lusting, I haven't exactly read the Bible yet...but I'm working on it, stealing grass and a tree from a cemetery, beating all those kids up in my school days, not picking on gay kids, listening to satanic music like every kind of music, etc...
I don't know if beating Matt and those jocks up was a sin because they were "unsaved"...
Anyways, I'm sure Jesus knows what I've done since he's all knowing.
*commences falling to knees and begging Jesus for forgiveness*
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Feel free to vote as divine wisdom guides you.
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Ladies of Landover Senior VP One of the Truest Christians™ Ever Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
True Christian™
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Posts: 12,662
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Standing behind my husband
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-19-2007, 11:40 AM
Is he one of those lost children living with a male "mother"?
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Unsaved Trash, Foul Worthless Garbage Hellbound Sinner
Forum Member
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Posts: 308
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: SPARTA
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-19-2007, 01:52 PM
If you don't think it's sincere, then don't accept it. Easy.
Hai guiz wuts goin on in dis internet?
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Scientific Advisor
True Christian™
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Posts: 2,369
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Landover Baptist University for the Saved, Corridor 17C
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-19-2007, 02:00 PM
What is his tithing status?
Trump 2020: "For Real This Time"
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-19-2007, 02:13 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.
What is his tithing status?
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Good point. Our records show that Minister Noddly has tithed more than him, and she's a woman! Curiously enough, our records also show that "Minister" Noodly wears less make-up than him.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Christ's Love Messenger
True Christian™
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Posts: 5,978
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: A road of rocks and glass
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-19-2007, 04:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria
Is he one of those lost children living with a male "mother"?
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As with most sodomites; their true identity and whereabouts are clouded in mystery. Generally they live a transient lifestyle with few aquaintances. Anybody they do know, shares their "meat-hoop" fascination & accompanying perversions. Occasionally they manage to join together forming a loosely knit allegiance; a nest of queers if you will. The Alpha Queer is usually given the name of Mom; but it is highly doubtful there is any real maternal influence.
Last edited by Deaner; 08-19-2007 at 06:58 PM.
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True Christian™
True Christian™
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Posts: 1,840
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Nice house on Nob Hill
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-19-2007, 05:07 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance
Good point. Our records show that Minister Noddly has tithed more than him, and she's a woman! Curiously enough, our records also show that "Minister" Noodly wears less make-up than him.
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Gosh, I don't remember anyone named Clown Boy. Is he the one who wears mekeup? What offense was it that landed him in quarantine? How long has he been in there?
... curious, noodle nods
1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...
1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...
Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...
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Honorary White Woman.
True Christian™
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Posts: 523
Join Date: Mar 2007
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-19-2007, 07:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by minister noddy
How long has he been in there?
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Not long enough fo' him to stop persecutin' us, despite the pastahs ministerin' to him with love and compassion as the LORD command!
"He went on CNN and he laughed at us, and he said, 'They'll never get me because Allah will protect me. Allah will protect me.' Well, you know what? I knew that my God was bigger than his. I knew that my God was a real God and his was an idol." - Lt. General William G. Boykin
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-20-2007, 03:08 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner
*commences falling to knees and begging Jesus for forgiveness*
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Thanks Clown's biatch, we just looooove sarcasm here. Oh yeah. Sarcasm. We just love it. We just can't get enough sarcasm. Ever. Did I mention how much we lo9ve sarcasm? Sarcasm is great. Sarcasm makes the world go round. Aaaaaaaw yeeaaaahh gimme more sarcasm. Sarcasm rools, dewd.
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 7
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: pits of hell
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-21-2007, 10:43 AM
whats the point in this poll when all the options are still no, plus as you pointed out final judgment will be left to some guy with holes in his hands so our opinion doesnt even matter regardless of options
gotta love that landover democracy (or is that hypocracy)
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Christ's Love Messenger
True Christian™
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Posts: 5,978
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: A road of rocks and glass
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-21-2007, 11:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by buddychrist
whats the point in this poll when all the options are still no, plus as you pointed out final judgment will be left to some guy with holes in his hands so our opinion doesnt even matter regardless of options
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Christ always has the final say sinner. Have you recently read any thousands of year old books that had queers and atheists running things? Didn't think so.
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Landover Security Superviser Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
True Christian™
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Posts: 18,555
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold Iowa
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Re: Vile sinner in Quarantine wants out; Landover needs your vote -
08-21-2007, 03:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by buddychrist
whats the point in this poll when all the options are still no, plus as you pointed out final judgment will be left to some guy with holes in his hands so our opinion doesnt even matter regardless of options
gotta love that landover democracy (or is that hypocracy)
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No it is theocracy.
The point is it is so Jesus can separate the sheep from the goats in His flock.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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