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Default Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-09-2007, 04:48 AM

Wow loves! I'm really surprised one of your self righteous PULPIT POUNDERS haven't posted the BIGGEST news story of the day! That being the unexpected passing of our dear Anna Nicole Smith. Poor girl! My heart goes out to her family and friends. She really tried to do her best in this life I think. She will be greatly missed by all of us!


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Default Re: Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-09-2007, 04:57 AM

Has all that jism you've ingested turned your brain to mush?


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Default Re: Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-09-2007, 05:45 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Virginia D. Templeton View Post
Has all that jism you've ingested turned your brain to mush?
Is that a rhetorical question, Sister V.D.?
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Default Re: Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-09-2007, 04:12 PM

I hope she's happy giving lapdances to Satan.
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Default Re: Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-09-2007, 04:19 PM

Why would we talk about that disgusting over weight harlot? Frankly I never got why everyone was so fixated on her. What is there in a busty blonde with a big butt for a TRUE Christian man too like??

Anyway she rejected Christ, just ask Pastor Zeke. What did he tell me? She was drunk and not nearly as receptive to His love as Pastor Zeke expected, or something like that.



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Default Re: Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-09-2007, 04:28 PM

I'd say meth overdose. There's no other way someone loses weight that fast.

But now she's in hell swimming in all the booze and pills she's ever consumed, where she belongs.


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Default Re: Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-10-2007, 04:31 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by BornAgain View Post
I'd say meth overdose. There's no other way someone loses weight that fast.

But now she's in hell swimming in all the booze and pills she's ever consumed, where she belongs.
If you were paying attention, BornAgain, you'd see there's another thread about Anna Nicole being called home by Jesus. http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=2079

Despite her drug-induced haze, she saw clearly enough to become Saved just a week or so ago, and left the bulk of her sizeable estate to Landover Baptist Church! Praise Jesus that her cash soul is now safe in our bank accounts Jesus' care!

(I'll close this thread and give the other a more clear title, so we don't have confusion.)

Last edited by OnYourKnees; 02-10-2007 at 04:34 AM.
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Default Re: Anna Nicole is Gone.... - 02-10-2007, 04:42 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Why would we talk about that disgusting over weight harlot? Frankly I never got why everyone was so fixated on her. What is there in a busty blonde with a big butt for a TRUE Christian man too like??

Anyway she rejected Christ, just ask Pastor Zeke. What did he tell me? She was drunk and not nearly as receptive to His love as Pastor Zeke expected, or something like that.
And I'd like to deny the rumors circulating in the secular press that I, too, might be the father of her 5 month old baby. Yes, I'd like to.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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