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Default Man with No Brain is Godly! - 02-20-2011, 08:07 PM

Good News! The report below excited Landover Biblical Science Faculty at Landover Christian University so much that we sent Professor Bessemer to investigate. After much time spent in necessary research in various insalubrious parts of Paris (most of the place), the Professor set off to find the man with virtually no brain.

In accordance with strict French Privacy Laws, we are unable to give any details whatsoever of this man’s whereabouts other than to say that he lives somewhere South West of Limoges. However, his neighbour at 12, Place De La Libération, 87920 Condat-sur-Vienne confirms that the man living in the house next door is the very man Prof. Bessemer is looking for!

The professor put the man through a series of tests in exchange for some beads and 5 Hershey bars and made his conclusions. The Professor speaks no French and the man speaks no English but communication was established by both parties’ speaking in tongues. The Professor’s report is being studied at the moment but the earliest and most important finding is that the man with most of his brain missing is a Fundamental Baptist!


The Lord has given him unquestioning Faith, and Faith is all anyone needs to live a perfect and holy life. His position in heaven is assured and it give hope for all those tards and gimps.


The Professor's report will be made public tomorrow with copies in the Library and Accounts Auditing Office.

(Don’t bother with the first minute of the video, nothing happens)








“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
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Default Re: Man with No Brain is Godly! - 02-20-2011, 10:24 PM

This might apply to several of our Landover Brothers and Pastors as well! Praise!!!
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Default Re: Man with No Brain is Godly! - 02-20-2011, 10:26 PM

It may well be the sign of all worldly temptations being removed and leaving behind a completely True Christian™ for there is much in a man's brain that works against God.





“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
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Default Re: Man with No Brain is Godly! - 02-20-2011, 10:30 PM

It would also explain why so many atheists have a high IQ.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Man with No Brain is Godly! - 02-20-2011, 11:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
It would also explain why so many atheists have a high IQ.
I'll have to grant them that. Otherwise, how could they have thought up all that goofy stuff for their nutty Religion of atheism?
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