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The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running aka the BiblethumpinBlonde
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,473
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Apostles Grove, Freehold, IA
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
12-20-2007, 06:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
I do indeed. With my rock hard abs (I swim 5 miles a day in my olympic-sized pool) and my natural good looks (blonde-haired and blue-eyed, just like Jesus!), I have innumerable queers wanting to commit sodomy on me. Being strong with Jesus, I am not tempted to indulge in that particular filthy sin.
I have hear it said that there are fan sites devoted to me on other forums, but I am too humble to check and see if that's true.
Praise Jesus!
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Oh, there he goes being all humble and shy again.
He indeed is a Hunk of Man on fire for the Lord!
Here is a pic I snapped of him last summer while he was mucking out a stall on my property.
Why, I bet even JESUS Himself envies Pastor Zeke's abs.
GLORY!
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 96
Join Date: Dec 2007
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
12-21-2007, 01:27 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
Oh, there he goes being all humble and shy again.
He indeed is a Hunk of Man on fire for the Lord!
Here is a pic I snapped of him last summer while he was mucking out a stall on my property.
Why, I bet even JESUS Himself envies Pastor Zeke's abs.
GLORY!
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That photo is fake.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
12-21-2007, 03:39 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by imback
That photo is fake.
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Prove it, heathen. Sister Thumper is my fiancee. Are calling her a liar?
I was there when that picture was taken, so don't come in here bearing false witness.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Didn't write the Bible, just obeys it
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Posts: 6,639
Join Date: Jun 2007
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
12-21-2007, 04:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by silver_cougar
Brethren, I am speechless. I only registered here a few minutes ago and posted in your introduction forum to say hi. Now that I have been looking around, I am stunned at what I am seeing. Giving away free video game systems to win people to Christ is materialism. Then people won't come to Christ for Christ, but because of the merchandise they can get.
Jesus condemned the Pharisees for making his Father's House a den of theives (See John 2:15-16). I'm afraid I can't encourage this at all.
In His Precious Name,
Roy
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Friend, now this is hate speech. Are you saying that "Prosperity Christianity" is equivalent to the theives who pillage New Orleans? Are you saying that the promise of Jesus to reward his followers a thousandfold is theivery?
The only reason people accept Christ is because he bribes them with heaven, a material reward. Heaven is a bribe. Are you calling Jesus a thief?
Disagree? By failing to register and debate me, you prove that liberals are factless frauds who only persuade through intimidation. To prove otherwise, debate me!
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 16
Join Date: Dec 2007
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
12-26-2007, 01:49 AM
Waste of Bandwidth removed. -Wash O'Hanley
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Unsaved trash
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Posts: 39
Join Date: Dec 2007
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
12-27-2007, 06:03 PM
I have accepted Jesus. Can I have my PS3 so I can sell it on eBay and go back to playing Fire Emblem on my Wii?
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 16
Join Date: Dec 2007
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
12-27-2007, 09:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ILikeJesus
Waste of Bandwidth removed. -Wash O'Hanley
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Additional waste of bandwidth removed- Wash O'Hanley
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 3
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: In an undisclosed bunker patiently awaiting the rapture
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-03-2008, 02:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance
Are you seriously trying to tell us that, as a little baby, you made a conscious decision to turn your life and soul over to Jesus and follow all His Commands?
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As the old Monty Python song "Every Sperm is Sacred," clearly explained, Catholics are Catholics from conception. The protestant British heathens were a bit more lewd, but you get the drift. We’re born saved, live with it.
Your friend in Christ,
Sister Abstinence
"I've reminded the prime minister-the American people, Mr. Prime Minister, over the past months that it was not always a given that the United States and America would have a close relationship." George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., June 29, 2006
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-03-2008, 02:50 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SisterAbstinenceOnly
As the old Monty Python song "Every Sperm is Sacred," clearly explained, Catholics are Catholics from conception. The protestant British heathens were a bit more lewd, but you get the drift. We’re born saved, live with it.
Your friend in Christ,
Sister Abstinence
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So I take it that you are another nary worshiper here to persecute us.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 64
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: in the pig pen
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-03-2008, 08:09 PM
Holy cow, sign me up!
I wants a free one!
You'd better pay for the S&H though, I dont do that.
I'll be willing to go to a non catholic church for 5 minutes if you give me one!
heya, the Xbox has Counter Strike source with it toO! I could totally practice my terrorist skills wielding Ak-47s with it! Sign me ups!
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 3
Join Date: Jan 2008
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-06-2008, 08:21 AM
I don't need video game systems to praise the Lord. Besides, everyone knows that Wii systems are recruiting the youth to homosexuality, it says so in your parenting forum!
I hope this is a joke, friends, because you are saying Wiis are evil, yet you are giving them away! This concerns me, and I pray for all of those who want a Wii.
All my blessings!
-Dave
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 1
Join Date: Jan 2008
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-07-2008, 07:06 AM
I do not understand the point of view you people have here. I looked at the actual page showing the offer, and I can understand wanting children to be saved, but I can not understand using an electronic device to sway them in that particular direction. When I got saved I made that decision by reading the bible and talking to a preacher. At that time, the original Playstation was just hitting the market, and sure I wanted one, but I didn't need that to persuade me to get saved. And then you tell the children to get their mother or father's checkbook or credit card? Come on, where I come from, thats considered STEALING. Isn't that condemned in the Bible? Not to mention the fact that it is ILLEGAL. I've dealt with people passing off stolen checks quite a bit, and they usually get prosecuted to some extent by law. I think that would be considered stolen IF the parents didn't approve it, and I'm almost sure that you are pushing toward that by this quote: "If your parents ask you where you got your new PlayStation 3, just tell them that your Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, delivered it to you via the U.S. Postal Service in exchange for your soul." Sounds to me like you don't want them to let their parents know how they acquired it, and that also would be a LIE, which is also condemned in the bible. And the children are going to be in big trouble when the parents' credit card or bank statement arrives in the mail. Then you say and again I quote: "Tell Jesus that you hate your parents, and that you'd rather have Him for your Daddy. Ask Him to forgive your sins, and cover you with His blood (you'll see plenty of that splattered across your TV when you play your complimentary Grand Theft Auto 3 game!)." You say your giving a complimentary copy of Grand Theft Auto 3, that is a violent, and yes as you said "bloody" game, packed with murder and bad language along with drug use, to CHILDREN? That's ridiculous. They make plenty of games that are not that bad. You have to be 18 at most retail stores to buy that game, and you are going to distribute it to children. It is rated mature. And you compare Christ's blood to the blood on a video game. Thats real good. My point is, you people are ridiculous. Save someone by convincing them to go to church. Read your bible. And be sure to talk bad and call me a sodomite and things of that nature because I don't agree with you. This site is a scam and personally I think that just maybe your church might be a scam, in fact, I would like to attend it someday to see what ploys you use in your sermons to get followers. In fact, instead of taking up offering, how about offering people money to come forward and be saved. There's an idea. Or maybe just go to a church where all you need is the word of God and the Spirit of the Holy Ghost to be saved.
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 63
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: petaluma, CA
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-15-2008, 06:40 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lieutenant88
When I got saved I made that decision by reading the bible and talking to a preacher. At that time, the original Playstation was just hitting the market, [/FONT]
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well then, maybe the playstation wasn't the gift for eternal grace recievers? I hope someady to get my very own playstation, and in fact, i accept jesus into my heart, and i really want a wII...
Praise Jesus!!
I am hungry for the blood of salvation!!
too bad you, my freind, are going to hell..
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Unsaved trash
Under Investigation
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Posts: 2
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-15-2008, 09:16 PM
I have accept jesus and now i want my kanker ps3
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-16-2008, 01:48 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sterf-kanker-jezus
I have accept jesus and now i want my kanker ps3
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Okay, then the final step would be the receipt of your Tithe. That is 10% of your (or your parents) gross income. Click on the Paypal button at the bottom of this page and we'll set you right up.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 6
Join Date: Jan 2008
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-19-2008, 10:29 PM
How is it that a Wii could be considered a part of a Godly community when one of your own articles refutes that?: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/2008/january/wii.html
Matthew 24:51
"And shall cut him asunder, and appoint him his portion with the hypocrites: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth."
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Senior Usher True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom A very nice young man
True Christian™
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Posts: 15,647
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: South Yorkshire, hotbed of sin
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-20-2008, 12:56 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by GunnyHackett
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When have we ever considered a Wii to be part of our Godly community? Are you getting a w-i-i mixed up with a p-s-3? Because if you are, I certainly wouldn't trust you to post a letter. The aborted fetuses I send to liberal feminazi politicians on a weekly basis are very important, and I certainly wouldn't want liberal incompetence ruining them, Praise Jesus!
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
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Posts: 6
Join Date: Jan 2008
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-20-2008, 01:05 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
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Brother Temperance, this is the very first post in this whole thread, and it explicitly endorses the Wii.
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Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
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Posts: 79,910
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-20-2008, 01:15 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by GunnyHackett
Brother Temperance, this is the very first post in this whole thread, and it explicitly endorses the Wii.
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We do not endorse wii, you ignorant queen. They are used as a means to reach out to the youth of America and get them Saved©. The software that we supply with the models we give away is somewhat......unique.
We would do literally anything to bring sinners to Christ.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
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Forum Member
Forum Member
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Posts: 316
Join Date: Jan 2008
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Re: ACCEPT JESUS AND GET A FREE PS3! -
01-20-2008, 02:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
Oh, there he goes being all humble and shy again.
He indeed is a Hunk of Man on fire for the Lord!
Here is a pic I snapped of him last summer while he was mucking out a stall on my property.
Why, I bet even JESUS Himself envies Pastor Zeke's abs.
GLORY!
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Though blond and blue-eyed, he is dark-brown, almost like a niggra. And he dares to compare himself to Him!
"Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me" -- Faaabulous President Bush, May 27, 2004
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