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Unsaved trash, failed troll
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-08-2017, 01:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Ladies, my teen daughter confided in me that her period is five weeks late. She's always had a cycle like clockwork. I'm curious about what it could be and have prayed about it but have not yet received any definite insight. Some of the things that have come to my attention during prayer time include: - stress (she seems stressed lately, snapping at us, short of temper, and feeling so nervous in the morning she throws up some days)
- friends (I've heard girls sometimes get on the same cycle if they're together)
- demons holding her womb hostage (I'm careful not to let any Harry Potter or Marvel Comic Universe paraphernalia into the house, but still)
- teen rebellion (her womb is rebelling against her authority)
Help a loving mamma out? Which one of these do you think is most likely?
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Consulted my tarot according to it it's God's will she is pregnant and 50 percent chance of a retard baby.
I don't doubt it's answer as I made a ton of accurate predictions before. So there you have it your daughter is pregnant. It was all in completely in God's will to do so. According to the tarot in regards to you. You got the hanged man which indicates that this mishap is all your own doing. Your being punished for your own faults and failings. You also got hierophant in reverse which indicates to me an air hypocrisy.
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Jesuit Insurgency Operative
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-08-2017, 01:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by InLoveWithChrisChan
Because it's a real book and witchcraft isn't real. I mean it's a real practice but the sorcery portrayed in Harry Potter has no basis in reality. Just like twilight it's a fantasy novel.
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Your right, both Harry Potter and Twilight are fantasy novel, two very bad and dangerous fantasy novel. Harry Potter lures little kids to the Wicca cult, while Twilight teaches teens to be vampire-loving prostitutes.
Quote:
Originally Posted by InLoveWithChrisChan
Consulted my tarot according to it it's God's will she is pregnant and 50 percent chance of a retard baby.
I don't doubt it's answer as I made a ton of accurate predictions before. So there you have it your daughter is pregnant. It was all in completely in God's will to do so. According to the tarot in regards to you. You got the hanged man which indicates that this mishap is all your own doing. Your being punished for your own faults and failings. You also got hierophant in reverse which indicates to me an air hypocrisy.
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Also, it seems that you are the hypocrite: you claim that Harry Potter has nothing to do with witchcraft, but at the same time you use tarot cards. You know who else uses tarot cards other than sorcerers? Gypsies. No wonder they have no country to live and are always hated by everyone.
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Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
True Christian™
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-08-2017, 06:13 PM
As a True Christian™ and someone with medical experience (granted, with horse dentistry) I am willing to perform godly tests that will help determine the issue, Sister Mary.
Any exam needs to be performed by either a hetero woman or a True Christian™ male who has no interest in the female body.
I mean, of course I am a normal man, but I, um - I mean, your child's safety is my only concern. You could be present during the exam and receive immediate results.
In loving friendship,
BrotherLarry
Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”
Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man. Amen and Amen
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Gushing for Jesus
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-08-2017, 06:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrotherLarry
As a True Christian™ and someone with medical experience (granted, with horse dentistry) I am willing to perform godly tests that will help determine the issue, Sister Mary.
Any exam needs to be performed by either a hetero woman or a True Christian™ male who has no interest in the female body.
I mean, of course I am a normal man, but I, um - I mean, your child's safety is my only concern. You could be present during the exam and receive immediate results.
In loving friendship,
BrotherLarry
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Brother, you are a soothing salve to an emotional sore. But like I already said, I have, and will continue, to REBUKE ANY PREGNANCY IN THE NAME OF JESUS!
There WILL be no miscarriage, because THERE IS NO PREGNANCY, IN GOD's NAME!
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Revelationary Equine Gnathologist for Christ
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-08-2017, 08:36 PM
Sister,
Your sentiment warmed the cockles of my heart as I felt the milk of human kindness gushing from the bowels of your being. However, the LORD GOD laid this on my heart as I prayed for pregnancy rebukation:
Jesus whispered: "As I have covered my daughter Mary with my warm honey from the rock, I urge you to convince her that her offspring might just need to confirm this situation with a medical professional. Yea, even now do I urge you to convince my daughter which beareth the same name as my mother to bring her precious child to a doctor or a gnathologist, for verily I see all and know all."
Then He hung up the spiritual phone line with a gentle "click."
I would never doubt the power of your faith, Dearest Sister friend, so I'll leave it to you - but wow, did Jesus ever seem serious.
May you be sheltered within the loving arms of Christ,
BrotherLarry
Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
“The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”
Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man. Amen and Amen
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Gushing for Jesus
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-08-2017, 10:14 PM
Medical intervention would be accepting the idea that rebuking evil in Jesus' name might not work.
I will not give Satan that victory.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-08-2017, 11:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
stress (she seems stressed lately, snapping at us, short of temper, and feeling so nervous in the morning she throws up some days)
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Woman never have stress. They have no real responsibilities ( Genesis 3:16, Ephesians 5:22-24) so there is nothing to stress about.
Most likely she simply is unable to count to 5 as all women are stupid ( Proverbs 9:13). Perhaps you can help her by pointing out she can use the fingers on her hand for that.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Unsaved trash, failed troll
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 10:59 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
Medical intervention would be accepting the idea that rebuking evil in Jesus' name might not work.
I will not give Satan that victory.
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God gave us the knowledge to create medicine and thus save lives.
I highly doubt that if God wanted us to be ignorant and backwards he would intended us to be that way. Prayer can work but I highly doubt it in this instance since my tarot told me it was God's will. I think in some instances I think god is merely waiting for you to solve your own problem with the knowledge and wisdom he has generously endowed us with.
Begging for something to not be isn't true prayer. Would you beg for something in the presence of your Lord? Your impiety only begs nothing. I read further into your issue last night and God is not going to answer your prayer as the answer has already been presented to you and because of your ex-catholic background he isn't obliged to listen.
When I drew the cards again I got the hierophant in reverse. I felt such wrath when I pulled that card as God is a bit angry with the hypocrisy you spewn. As for when I'm not sure probably your ex Catholic background. When I pulled the empress in reverse after I knew that his method of is fertility in its worst context for you. The high priestess in reverse said to that the time of prayer has passed. God already gave you an answer thus he will listen no more.
If you want a nonmedical test. Bleach will foam up immensely in a pregnant woman's urine. You take urine place it in a cup take a cup of bleach pour it into the urine
do this outside as the byproduct of this amonia. If it foams up alot she might be pregnant. But it hinges on how far along she maybe. A certain hormone is excreted through urine which will interact with bleach. How much depends on how far along so it's not accurate.
Or you can buy a pregnancy test bless the conduct the test at home.
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Unsaved trash, failed troll
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 11:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
Woman never have stress. They have no real responsibilities (Genesis 3:16, Ephesians 5:22-24) so there is nothing to stress about.
Most likely she simply is unable to count to 5 as all women are stupid (Proverbs 9:13). Perhaps you can help her by pointing out she can use the fingers on her hand for that.
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Yes because birth isn't hard nope not stressful at all it's not like some women don't have jobs or anything.
I'm sorry didn't Deliah helped Samson's downfall in by cutting his hair? What about Esther saving her people? Obviously to accomplish any of these tasks requires some degree of intelligence. Or are you saying that godly woman should be dumb?
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 11:13 AM
God has no positive response to divination by shuffling cards entrails or any other random event. You might as well type random nonSense and scry into that. Oh, wait..
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Unsaved trash, failed troll
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 11:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor
God has no positive response to divination by shuffling cards entrails or any other random event. You might as well type random nonSense and scry into that. Oh, wait..
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Not when I accruately predicted the sex of five babies this year and helped a friend win some money. I'm fairly physic in that area.
Then again I'm not the one rejecting modern medicine because I believe Satan will dance because someone pissed on a stick. I think Satan is far too busy for stupid stuff like that. You know torturing sinners.
I wonder what you'd guys do if you get cancer or like that just pray until the cancer eats you away?
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Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah You kids get off his lawn!
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 11:34 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by InLoveWithChrisChan
I wonder what you'd guys do if you get cancer or like that just pray until the cancer eats you away?
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I would welcome cancer. I am old so I really look forward to dying and going to Heaven.
Freedom means voting for Donald Trump!
To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
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Unsaved trash, failed troll
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 11:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cranky Old Man
I would welcome cancer. I am old so I really look forward to dying and going to Heaven.
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Well I understand that my mom feels that way too but I'm talking about idgits who have years left and reject modern medicine. I'd imagine they'd feel the same way about vaccines too. I think what they're doing is foolish and stupid. God gave us knowledge there is no reason not to use it.
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Mayor of Freehold
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 02:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mary Etheldreda
... to REBUKE ANY PREGNANCY IN THE NAME OF JESUS!
There WILL be no miscarriage, because THERE IS NO PREGNANCY, IN GOD's NAME!
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All of us here should be supporting you in your decision, Sister Mary, that there is no pregnancy. We should be joining you in prayer asking that God will the missed period to be due to the cold weather or some other reason. When you, her mother, know for a fact there has been no exposure to pregnancy that possibility is closed.
I, for one, stand with you Sister and pray for the entire matter to soon disappear and be forgotten.
Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
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South of the Border outreach program True Christian™
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 05:45 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by InLoveWithChrisChan
God gave us the knowledge to create medicine and thus save lives.
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Wrong.
The only time the Bible mentions calling a physician it is a cautionary tale:
2 Chronicles 16:12-13
12 And Asa in the thirty and ninth year of his reign was diseased in his feet, until his disease was exceeding great: yet in his disease he sought not to the Lord, but to the physicians.
13 And Asa slept with his fathers, and died in the one and fortieth year of his reign.
Faith healing (James 5:14-16) is the only Biblically recommended procedure.
Quote:
I highly doubt that if God wanted us to be ignorant and backwards he would intended us to be that way.
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So you think He did some perverted reverse psychology trick on us when He wrote this:
1 Corinthians 3:18-20
18 Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you seemeth to be wise in this world, let him become a fool, that he may be wise.
19 For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, He taketh the wise in their own craftiness.
20 And again, The Lord knoweth the thoughts of the wise, that they are vain.
That would be really cruel of Him, don't you think?
Quote:
Prayer can work but I highly doubt it in this instance since my tarot told me it was God's will.
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Any divination methods are an abomination in the eyes of the Lord:
Deuteronomy 18:10-12
10 There shall not be found among you [any one] that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, [or] that useth divination, [or] an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch,
11 Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer.
12 For all that do these things [are] an abomination unto the LORD: and because of these abominations the LORD thy God doth drive them out from before thee.
Quote:
Originally Posted by InLoveWithChrisChan
Not when I accruately predicted the sex of five babies this year and helped a friend win some money. I'm fairly physic in that area.
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I have no idea what you mean by this sentence.
Are you trying to say you are of a fair physique?
Or that you're good at physics?
Or are you implying to be a psychic (in which case it would be more efficient if you learned how to spell that word)?
Quote:
I wonder what you'd guys do if you get cancer or like that just pray until the cancer eats you away?
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Yes. Prayer is ALWAYS the answer.
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Gushing for Jesus
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Posts: 23,729
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 06:04 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johny Joe Hold
All of us here should be supporting you in your decision, Sister Mary, that there is no pregnancy. We should be joining you in prayer asking that God will the missed period to be due to the cold weather or some other reason. When you, her mother, know for a fact there has been no exposure to pregnancy that possibility is closed.
I, for one, stand with you Sister and pray for the entire matter to soon disappear and be forgotten.
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Thank you, Brother Mayor! I am heartily encouraged by your promise! I know Jesus will not refuse to hear so many righteous prayers!
As to the nay-sayer on this thread who thinks prayers don't work this way, I would refer her to a theological paper that uses academic logic to explain exactly how we can have confidence in Christ when we pray in this very way: The Mathematics and Quantum Mechanics of Prayer, by Ezekiel Bathfire, Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance.
Quote:
Seconds in a day: 24 x 60 x 60 = 86400
It is fair to assume that all seven billion people pray once a day = 810,185 prayers every second.
Some prayers will conflict -> “Send rain” – “Keep it fine.” A decision has to be made.
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I recognize this paper is very technical. I had to read it a number of times before I felt like I was starting to really understand it. Nevertheless, perseverance and prayer will help the Sincere Believer.
Quote:
However, some theologians claim that the reason that there can be no real “past prayer” is that the past is the history of God’s plan – it is perfect, and therefore should not, and cannot, be changed.
They forget the obvious: Although we think we are experiencing “God’s Perfect Plan” – If our brains are sent a new message from God, then that message becomes “God’s Perfect Plan” and what we thought was reality was a delusion.
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Anyway, it's very well explained. Thankfully, I believe in a God who holds the entirety of Creation in His Hands, and so therefore has already figured out a way to answer my prayer in the midst of countless others clogging up the prayer-waves.
Hello, my name is Mary. I hope to fellowship with you! That is, unless you don't listen to church authority (Deuteronomy 17:12); are a witch (Exodus 22:17); are a homosexual (Leviticus 20:13; Romans 1:24-32); or fortuneteller (Leviticus 20:27) or a snotty kid who hits their dad (Exodus 21:15); or curses their parents (Proverbs 20:20; Leviticus 20:9); an adulterer (Leviticus 20:10); a non-Christian (Exodus 22:19; Deuteronomy 13:7-12; Deuteronomy 17:2-5;Romans 1:24-32); an atheist (2 Chronicles 15:12-13); or false prophet (Zechariah 13:3); from the town of one who worships another, false god (Deuteronomy 13:13-19); were a non-virgin bride (Deuteronomy 22:20-21); or blasphemer (Leviticus 24:10-16), as God calls for your execution and will no doubt send you to Hell, and I have no interest developing a friendship with the Spiritually Walking Dead.
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Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 06:21 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by InLoveWithChrisChan
God gave us the knowledge to create medicine and thus save lives...
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Why did He (omnipotent, perfect, and infallible, according to the Bible) do such a poor job creating us that we need medicine in the first place?
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True Christian™ Just a Regular Nice Guy
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 06:58 PM
Mary, first off you have my most sincere condolences. Daughters are a problem. But we must work with what God gives us, even if it is a disappointment.
As you know, I have had more than my fair share of daughters, perhaps a dozen or more. Most are married off and a few still 'live off of dear old dad'.
I learned long ago, the female often carries 'a perfume'. Not unlike a skunk that was recently run over on a country road. I discovered (not willingly, I assure you) that "Lysol Rinsing" eliminates the odor and the related causes.
I also know this has completely eliminated the 'public toilet pregnancy' problem in the Hutchin's House.
Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 07:58 PM
Sister Mary, is it possible that your daughter's period is simply later than usual and she's stressed because she's afraid of people thinking that she's pregnant? Some people tend to get cranky or start eating more when they're stressed, so her behavior and increased appetite could just be signs of her stress. I'll pray for her period to start soon.
And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
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Completely CRAZY for the Lord
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Re: Reasons my daughter's period could be late? -
11-09-2017, 08:28 PM
Error accented in green.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much
Why did He (omnipotent, perfect, and infallible, according to the Bible) do such a poor job creating us that we need medicine in the first place?
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See where you're going wrong?
God did not do such a poor job creating us that we need medicine in the first place.
Adam began perfect. There was no disease, no death.
I'll take this slowly for you.
GENESIS 2 .KJV . look up
8 The LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.
9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
At this stage there was no sin in the world and therefore no death.
ROMANS 5 .KJV . look up
12 By one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:
Not everyone sinned in the same way as Adam, who disobeyed a direct command from God even though he didn't know what disobedience was and didn't know what death was either because how could he see something die before death existed?
GENESIS 2 .KJV . look up
16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
Satan knew though. Satan wanted to get his death cult going with its disease and suffering and and things with two heads or no legs or with arms and legs but also with leprosy. For that to happen sin was necessary. Whether they were sins of omission or sins of commission is immaterial here but I covered that in the Romans link because it's the sort of detail you're likely to come up with. That would be a sin of anticipation in your case, hoping to trip up God in His own inerrant word. Satan proceeded as follows, in his serpent persona:
GENESIS 3 .KJV . look up
1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
There you have the origin of sin. Sin leads to death and one cause of death is disease. Think figs.
Now compare dried figs.
These are like your soul, withering away, becoming wizened and bitter and as the process continues it dries up completely until, fully zapped by sin, there's nothing left but a little pile of dust which simply blows away.
. .19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.
God here is referring to your body. How do we know that? By simple observation. It's not some doctrine I just thought up on prozac. Because after you've blown away there will be an extended torture session, worse and worse, and worse and worse, forever.
LUKE 12 .KJV . look up
4 [Jesus speaking] And I say unto you my friends, Be not afraid of them that kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do.
5 But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him.
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