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  • #31
    Re: I will turn 18 one week from today.

    Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
    Is Sister Isabella still teaching her class on Power Rebuking? I believe I could afford the suggested donation this year, if I take some money out of my retirement account.
    I don't know, Brother, but if she is then the class in how to deliver the cold, hard death-glare is well worth the donation. The rest is good too, but that one has been the most useful in controlling both the unSaved and my youngest children. Oh, and tradesmen, of course.
    Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

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    • #32
      Re: I will turn 18 one week from today.

      Originally posted by Mary Etheldreda View Post
      Nonsense. No True Christian™ in her right mind would socialize with the Spiritual Riff Raff, much less work for them for monetary compensation. Sister Isabella is a Prayer Warrior of extraordinary measure and is too busy Power Rebuking those gosh darned library Drag Queens Story Time horrors that keep popping up like rats (please excuse my language).
      Oh, dear Sister Mary: Thank you so much for speaking so kindly of my efforts to rid our libraries of those darned drag queens. You know, when I was the Librarian at my local library, I had quite a job on my hands, what with going through the stacks of sinful books (anything by Shakespeare, for example) and removing them for use in the upcoming bonfires. But, now, being a good librarian (especially a -fearing, one) has become much more challenging, what with these pansy-faced perverts trying to take our children down the garden path. Well, I won't have it! And neither with the ! I might be on in years, but I'm as determined as ever to fight the injustice of sin that infiltrates our schools and libraries. And I'll continue to stand on the Word of the for as long as He gives breath to these old lungs.


      Originally posted by Joanna Lytton-Vasey View Post
      Has someone hacked Sister Isabella's password? Some of her posts on this thread have been peculiar. I did suggest, privately, that using the word "password" as your password is unwise, but I'm not sure that she understood why.

      This whole business is all very odd, especially this:
      Do they even have colored folks in Newfoundland? I suspect that psychopathic drugs may be involved here.
      Oh, dear Sister Joanna: I do thank you for your concern but, so far as I know, my account has not been hacked. I'm not sure that I understand which of my posts have been peculiar, though. Perhaps it's because I've been trying to give some support to dear Sister Maxine, as it seems she's somewhat confused (that's between you and me) these days, what with her ordeal over the truck stalling in the middle of Nowhere and all. And, yes, they do have the odd nigra in Newfoundland. Agatha's Toronto friend (Priscilla) mentioned that it is so, although the people there are not accustomed to seeing blackened faces. Apparently, some of the children have suffered severe nightmares from such unexpected horrors when they were enjoying their cod tongue dinners at restaurants.


      Originally posted by Faith_Machine View Post
      Is Sister Isabella still teaching her class on Power Rebuking? I believe I could afford the suggested donation this year, if I take some money out of my retirement account.
      Oh, dear Faith: Indeed, yes, I am still teaching Power-Rebuking. As a matter of fact, I have just returned from the McGill Street Tuesday Afternoon Ladies' Prayer Group, where we had a grand, old time praising the , and rebuking the Demonrats that would steal the Presidency from our -sent President Donald J. Trump. (May he rule forever!) I'll share a little secret with you about rebuking effectively: it is especially powerful with two little steps: 1) Wear your reading glasses down on your nose; 2) Glare and frown as much as possible.


      Originally posted by BibleReader2231 View Post
      Update: I got married as of Wednesday last week. After paying a hefty sum for Sister Isabella to design the wedding cake, we didn’t have much else left for decorations so we improvised with what was available at the dollar store. The photos are still on the disposable cameras to be processed but once they are, I’ll share with all of you.

      Unfortunately, my newfound hubby has been shot down by a Nigra the very next day. This, coupled with the fact that I found out from the court system that I am still 17, the marriage was annulled. I am devastated by this. I was sure that I was turning 18. I was all set to begin my life as a loyal wife. I am now the owner of the man’s estate though. What do i do with the money? Also, putting his baby in the care of the state. It’s not my baby.
      Oh, dear Heaven above, Sister Maxine! I am horrified to hear of this tragic news, but you know, it's probably the best thing that's happened to you all summer. The wedding plans do sound somewhat rushed, thrown together like a dog's breakfast, and I was afraid that something bad was going to happen. I do so hope that you're not too upset and have been praying constantly to find yourself in favor with once again. Now, as for the wedding cake business: I insisted that I would bake the cake and send it you as my gift for your big day, even though you said you would pay me. Your check has not arrived yet and when it does, it shall be returned to you immediately. It is my hope that you have enjoyed the cake, though, and I hope that it helped to take your mind off the tragedy. And what happened to the nigra who shot your hubby? Did the police nail him good, too?

      A blessed day to you, dear friends at ,
      Sincerely, Isabella W.
      (Mrs.) Isabella White

      Hebrews 10:19 "Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the Blood of Jesus"

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      • #33
        Re: I will turn 18 one week from today.

        Originally posted by BibleReader2231 View Post
        Update:
        tl;dr: you are still going to Hell (1 Timothy 2:15).
        God created fossils to test our faith.

        * * *

        My favorite LBC sermons:
        True Christians are Perfect!
        True Christian™ Love.
        Salvation™ made Easy!
        You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
        Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
        Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
        Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
        Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
        The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
        Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
        God HATES Rational Thinking!
        True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

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        • #34
          Re: I will turn 18 one week from today.

          Look, I'm not a snob or anything. I don't have a snobbish bone in my body. Some of my best friends are mouth-breathing inbred trucker-bomb jugglers. But this is too much for even me.

          We try to have a touch of class around here, and that becomes impossible when certain ladies (I'm using the term loosely) stray from the ladies forum, and from their housework, to clutter this forum like so much goose-poop on the diamond-tither's golf course.

          This thread is closed.

          PS the cake gave me heartburn.
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