The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. |
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 11
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Demoyins Eyewa
|
|
Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-24-2009, 11:50 PM
I is Damien. I come up here wit Mama Johnson ta be wit real church folk. Bible beleavin Christien folk woo rely beleav in da Lawd. I ain't got much fo school'n, but i got a mity strong body and i is willin to work. I's be's hop'n ta get some lernin at you Bible school cos i ain't got da mony fo no big city school hous. i's wanna be da firs n ma fambly ta get a diploma.
I ben workin n Demoyins at da junk yard tempararly but i was hopin i be abul ta get job do'n da grass, cleanin da halls n stuff at da church. i's be reel strong to. i can cary stuf reel gud.
|
|
Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
|
|
Posts: 79,909
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Freehold, Iowa
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-24-2009, 11:54 PM
Welcome to God's favorite forum, boy. I couldn't understand much of what you said, but if you're looking for work, I might need a new pool boy pretty soon. Come around my estate tonight after 11. I want to see what you look like in a Speedo can do with your hands.
Be sure and use the servant entrance.
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 1,060
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: The Godly State of South Carolina
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-24-2009, 11:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Damien Cross
I is Damien. I come up here wit Mama Johnson ta be wit real church folk. Bible beleavin Christien folk woo rely beleav in da Lawd. I ain't got much fo school'n, but i got a mity strong body and i is willin to work. I's be's hop'n ta get some lernin at you Bible school cos i ain't got da mony fo no big city school hous. i's wanna be da firs n ma fambly ta get a diploma.
I ben workin n Demoyins at da junk yard tempararly but i was hopin i be abul ta get job do'n da grass, cleanin da halls n stuff at da church. i's be reel strong to. i can cary stuf reel gud.
|
Welcome Damien. Are you able to read proper English or would you prefer me to speak in your native tongue?. You've made a fine decision to come here. You'll have to ask the Pastors if you can help out with the more menial chores.
Your first step to self improvement will be to go through the ex-Negro program. That should prepare you to be able to get your GED. If you're VERY smart then maybe you can get into one of those Historically Black colleges that offer an inferior education but are politically correct come hiring time.
One word of advice, stay away from the white women. It can only bring you trouble.
Good luck Damien!
Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus
In the Beginning God created the Heaven and the Earth. Genesis 1.1. This scripture is the first verse of the Bible for a reason. It lays the foundation for the absolute truth found in God's Holy WORD, the Bible.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 11
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Demoyins Eyewa
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 12:01 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel
Welcome to God's favorite forum, boy. I couldn't understand much of what you said, but if you're looking for work, I might need a new pool boy pretty soon. Come around my estate tonight after 11. I want to see what you look like in a Speedo can do with your hands.
Be sure and use the servant entrance.
|
I don no nutin bout no pools Mister Ezekiel. But i put a foto n ma profile page. I got mony bak home to tak som fotos from dis artsy typ bout a yir ago. Wi yu ned dat foto Mister Ezekiel?
|
|
Rock Worshipper
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 1,083
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Flat Rock, MN
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 12:05 AM
Rest assured my boy in the firm knowledge that Paster Zeke will plumb the depths of your knowledge and inject some smart reasoning into your folksy vernacular....
and welcome to the big house! (of Gods that is not the other kind)
I am on the adventure of a lifetime! This is even better than the time I used the plastic stones!
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 11
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Demoyins Eyewa
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 12:05 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Lazarus
Welcome Damien. Are you able to read proper English or would you prefer me to speak in your native tongue?. You've made a fine decision to come here. You'll have to ask the Pastors if you can help out with the more menial chores.
Your first step to self improvement will be to go through the ex-Negro program. That should prepare you to be able to get your GED. If you're VERY smart then maybe you can get into one of those Historically Black colleges that offer an inferior education but are politically correct come hiring time.
One word of advice, stay away from the white women. It can only bring your trouble.
Good luck Damien!
Yours in Christ
Brother Lazarus
|
Thank ya sir fo yo kind wurds. Yu peples sur is frendly folk. Ain't no whit womens wer i's is from. no sir. So how i gets n dat ex-negro program?
|
|
Mammy
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 961
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: floriduh
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 03:06 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Damien Cross
I is Damien. I come up here wit Mama Johnson ta be wit real church folk. Bible beleavin Christien folk woo rely beleav in da Lawd. I ain't got much fo school'n, but i got a mity strong body and i is willin to work. I's be's hop'n ta get some lernin at you Bible school cos i ain't got da mony fo no big city school hous. i's wanna be da firs n ma fambly ta get a diploma.
I ben workin n Demoyins at da junk yard tempararly but i was hopin i be abul ta get job do'n da grass, cleanin da halls n stuff at da church. i's be reel strong to. i can cary stuf reel gud.
|
Mercy on me!
Yous unsaved trash ! Yous the debil hiself!. Mr Sam cleans up at da landober and yous better finds youself somebin else!
|
|
Mammy
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 961
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: floriduh
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 03:11 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Damien Cross
I is Damien. I come up here wit Mama Johnson ta be wit real church folk. Bible beleavin Christien folk woo rely beleav in da Lawd. I ain't got much fo school'n, but i got a mity strong body and i is willin to work. I's be's hop'n ta get some lernin at you Bible school cos i ain't got da mony fo no big city school hous. i's wanna be da firs n ma fambly ta get a diploma.
I ben workin n Demoyins at da junk yard tempararly but i was hopin i be abul ta get job do'n da grass, cleanin da halls n stuff at da church. i's be reel strong to. i can cary stuf reel gud.
|
Lawd hab mercy , eyes donno no colored fellow named no Damien. Missa Massa Passa, Mr Sam will gives yous all da works you need. Don let no outside trash mosey on into da landober. You don have enoughs folding cahirs for us colored folks as it is!
|
|
Tin Tither
True Christian™
|
|
Posts: 234
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: pastors garage
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 03:20 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Damien Cross
I ben workin n Demoyins at da junk yard tempararly but i was hopin i be abul ta get job do'n da grass, cleanin da halls n stuff at da church. i's be reel strong to. i can cary stuf reel gud.
|
Hi damien maybe we can do the grass together i got layed off at land of goshen Christian lawn care and the pastors keep telling me that if i keep up on my tithes then maybe God will bless me with a job doing the church lawn.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Damien Cross
I don no nutin bout no pools Mister Ezekiel. But i put a foto n ma profile page. I got mony bak home to tak som fotos from dis artsy typ bout a yir ago. Wi yu ned dat foto Mister Ezekiel?
|
Now dont get uppity to the pastors we have to do what they say even if it seems not quite right to us its like they keep telling me thats the way God wants it.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 48
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Denver, CO
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 06:26 AM
Hey there boy. I pay in fried chicken and watermelon if you stop by and clean my windows and pick the cotton out on the back forty. Praise Jesus!!!
I DON'T WANT TO GO TO HELL!!!
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 11
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Demoyins Eyewa
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 10:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vavoline Johnson
Lawd hab mercy , eyes donno no colored fellow named no Damien. Missa Massa Passa, Mr Sam will gives yous all da works you need. Don let no outside trash mosey on into da landober. You don have enoughs folding cahirs for us colored folks as it is!
|
Is me Mama Johnson! I's Cornbread!!!
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 11
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Demoyins Eyewa
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 11:09 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jimmy-Roy Stewart
Hi damien maybe we can do the grass together i got layed off at land of goshen Christian lawn care and the pastors keep telling me that if i keep up on my tithes then maybe God will bless me with a job doing the church lawn.
Now dont get uppity to the pastors we have to do what they say even if it seems not quite right to us its like they keep telling me thats the way God wants it.
|
I's ain't uppity. I jus acts da man a Q.
|
|
Forum Member
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 108
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Tulsa, Oklahoma
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 06:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brian Dyk
Hey there boy. I pay in fried chicken and watermelon if you stop by and clean my windows and pick the cotton out on the back forty. Praise Jesus!!!
|
Go back to your corner of hell, Mr Dyk.....
|
|
Mammy
Forum Member
|
|
Posts: 961
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: floriduh
|
|
Re: Hello to yall gud Bible folks -
04-25-2009, 08:04 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Damien Cross
Is me Mama Johnson! I's Cornbread!!!
|
You sho you not Beezers boy Henrys? Hes da one dats stole da Evian watah fors da baptismal last weeks.
|
Thread Tools |
|
Display Modes |
Linear Mode
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9 Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved
|