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Default Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-14-2015, 05:14 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
Back off, whore.
"The boy is mine" back off, or "cool your jets" back off?


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Cross Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-14-2015, 02:26 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post


Well. Ahem. There's, uh... there's really nothing I can say to that...







1) As a sexual health educator and soon-to-be sex therapist, I was speaking to Brother Hutchins in a purely professional capacity.

2) If it wasn't for the gutter, my mind would be homeless.
You people are obsessed with Gods Chosen Method of creating new potential Christians. So many people fail to 'make the grade' and have to be tossed into Hell. To remind us all of the risks we expose these potential souls to, God makes us fornicate and defecate. Even young strapping children have to defecate! He does not make us masturbate. That is the Devil tempting us.
Every ten months (30 days after expressing a progeny) when I have to 'do it' with my wife, Mrs. Hutchins, I am utterly repelled at the vile act of internal physical contact. Punishment for my potential ability to sin.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-14-2015, 02:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
"The boy is mine" back off, or "cool your jets" back off?
It's a "cool your jets" back off. Pastor Ezekiel and Witch Hammer are both Godly straight men.


And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
Deuteronomy 6.5
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Default Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-14-2015, 06:32 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Esther B. View Post
It's a "cool your jets" back off. Pastor Ezekiel and Witch Hammer are both Godly straight men.
Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
I have spent countless hours in heated encounters with Pastor Ezekiel, trying to get a good grip on masturbating.
Are you sure?

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
<snip>Discussion of scat</snip>

Every ten months (30 days after expressing a progeny) when I have to 'do it' with my wife, Mrs. Hutchins, I am utterly repelled at the vile act of internal physical contact. Punishment for my potential ability to sin.
That's more of a punishment for Mrs. Hutchins, actually, since it is generally recommended that a woman wait at least 6 weeks after a birth to recommence sexual activity (longer if she had to have stitches or if interventions such as forceps, vacuum, or C-section were required). It is also recommended that a woman wait a minimum of 18 months post-birth to try to conceive again, though 20-24 months is considered ideal; this allows the body enough time to recover and it's better for both the mother and the new baby.


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Default Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-14-2015, 11:18 PM

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Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
Are you sure?



That's more of a punishment for Mrs. Hutchins, actually, since it is generally recommended that a woman wait at least 6 weeks after a birth to recommence sexual activity (longer if she had to have stitches or if interventions such as forceps, vacuum, or C-section were required). It is also recommended that a woman wait a minimum of 18 months post-birth to try to conceive again, though 20-24 months is considered ideal; this allows the body enough time to recover and it's better for both the mother and the new baby.
Mrs. Hutchins is blessed to be given any grace period what-so-ever. In my home, seeding commences as soon as the baby clears the birth canal. I enjoy the chore as little as Brother Hutchins does...its a dirty job, but it must be done.Genesis 1:28
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Cross Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-15-2015, 01:06 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
Are you sure?



That's more of a punishment for Mrs. Hutchins, actually, since it is generally recommended that a woman wait at least 6 weeks after a birth to recommence sexual activity (longer if she had to have stitches or if interventions such as forceps, vacuum, or C-section were required). It is also recommended that a woman wait a minimum of 18 months post-birth to try to conceive again, though 20-24 months is considered ideal; this allows the body enough time to recover and it's better for both the mother and the new baby.
So you think she should just lie about while chores need to be done, meals made? Most of the time, she has had a baby and then finished her daily obligations. Doing her labors is what makes her think she is fulfilled. If she is not with child, she has no purpose. Thanks to Gods Will and my tolerance, that period of time is minimized.
All births have been natural, often occurring at the sink or in the barn, picthing hay, slopping pigs or shoveling out stalls. From time to time, when sitting in my den, I have heard the cries of a newborn that is soon moved off to the soundproofed nursery so I am resume my work reading the KJV Bible.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.WickedWitch is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-15-2015, 08:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
In my home, seeding commences as soon as the baby clears the birth canal.
That is not only cruel, it's also pointless. You do realise that a woman is not fertile immediately after birth, right? You have to wait for her periods to return before trying to conceive again, and the length of time it takes for periods to return varies from woman to woman (even pregnancy to pregnancy) and depends on a lot of factors. Example: Baby Wicked was born back in November and I still haven't started menstruating yet because of breastfeeding.

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
So you think she should just lie about while chores need to be done, meals made? Most of the time, she has had a baby and then finished her daily obligations. Doing her labors is what makes her think she is fulfilled. If she is not with child, she has no purpose. Thanks to Gods Will and my tolerance, that period of time is minimized.
All births have been natural, often occurring at the sink or in the barn, picthing hay, slopping pigs or shoveling out stalls. From time to time, when sitting in my den, I have heard the cries of a newborn that is soon moved off to the soundproofed nursery so I am resume my work reading the KJV Bible.
I am not even going to address all the cruelty in this post, except to mention its existence.


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Guns Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-16-2015, 10:42 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
....
I am not even going to address all the cruelty in this post, except to mention its existence.
My address? I live off of 29, between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain. Come by for a visit.


Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.
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Default Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-16-2015, 10:45 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
My address? I live off of 29, between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain. Come by for a visit.
I just... I don't... Why would you think... What?


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Angry Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-17-2015, 02:01 AM

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Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
That is not only cruel, it's also pointless. You do realise that a woman is not fertile immediately after birth, right? You have to wait for her periods to return before trying to conceive again, and the length of time it takes for periods to return varies from woman to woman (even pregnancy to pregnancy) and depends on a lot of factors. Example: Baby Wicked was born back in November and I still haven't started menstruating yet because of breastfeeding.



I am not even going to address all the cruelty in this post, except to mention its existence.
You have a vulgar tongue, sorceress. That kind of language is not welcome in these family-friendly forums.
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Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Pastor Ezekiel will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Jesus is watching you masturbate - 07-17-2015, 04:55 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by James Hutchins View Post
My address? I live off of 29, between Lynchburg and Walton's Mountain. Come by for a visit.
Amen brother. That'll be the last trip she makes on her broomstick.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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