HOME WELCOME! FORUMS Register FAQ Calendar
Go Back   The Landover Baptist Church Forum > Church Forums > PRAYER REQUESTS
Reload this Page I wrote this prayer for you all
PRAYER REQUESTS Please check regularly

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
(#1)
Old
St James of England St James of England is offline
Unsaved trash
 
  
Posts: 51
Join Date: Apr 2008
St James of England is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 01:22 PM
Dear Charles Darwin
You told us of your storys
and showed us how were related to monkeys
we thank thee for telling us of Jesus being a homer
we thank thee for your effort in making us normal
to being atheist

ah men

Psalm 14:1 The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
Reply With Quote
(#2)
Old
Mr_Ass's Avatar
Mr_Ass Mr_Ass is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
  
Posts: 1
Join Date: Apr 2008
Mr_Ass is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 01:29 PM
YOU HERETIC, HELL AWAITS YOU
Reply With Quote
(#3)
Old
Deaner's Avatar
Deaner Deaner is offline
Christ's Love Messenger
True Christian™

True Christian™ Long service medal, 2nd class One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Best Mullet Parking Lot Tither True Christian Provider™ award Ribfest '06 Punched the most queers The Lord’s Witness Wound Heaven Bound TC Bravery Ready for the Rapture Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator True Christian Caucasian True Christian Hotrodder Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Flat Earth Tell her once The Lord’s Witness Wound Eats the Most Pork Eats the Most Pork True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Hatchet Child Rearing Award Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Persecuted Porn Resistant Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Tagging for Jesus Saved 5 Years Divorcee Super Soaker Baptism Award Real American™ Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Truck Stop Ministry Member Chariot of Fire True Christian Hotrodder Pastor of GOD Senior Pastor 4th Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 1st Year Bible College Long service medal, 3rd class In Love With Zeke

 
Posts: 5,978
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: A road of rocks and glass
Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 01:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by St James of England View Post
Dear Charles Darwin
You told us of your storys
and showed us how were related to monkeys
we thank thee for telling us of Jesus being a homer
we thank thee for your effort in making us normal
to being atheist

ah men
Ok, let me see if I've got this straight. We have the Bible which explains the glory of man, covering the entire history of mankind and explaining what happens when you die...

Then some guy comes along and tells you Jesus is a queer and your ancestors were monkeys and you bought that? Friend you're an idiot.
Reply With Quote
(#4)
Old
Deaner's Avatar
Deaner Deaner is offline
Christ's Love Messenger
True Christian™

True Christian™ Long service medal, 2nd class One Year/1000 posts Christian Love Best Mullet Parking Lot Tither True Christian Provider™ award Ribfest '06 Punched the most queers The Lord’s Witness Wound Heaven Bound TC Bravery Ready for the Rapture Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator True Christian Caucasian True Christian Hotrodder Teabag Patriot Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Flat Earth Tell her once The Lord’s Witness Wound Eats the Most Pork Eats the Most Pork True Republican Sons of Liberty Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Hatchet Child Rearing Award Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Persecuted Porn Resistant Hatchet Child Rearing Award Kirk Cameron Fan Club Tagging for Jesus Saved 5 Years Divorcee Super Soaker Baptism Award Real American™ Prayer Warrior 2012 Witch Hunt Award Truck Stop Ministry Member Chariot of Fire True Christian Hotrodder Pastor of GOD Senior Pastor 4th Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 1st Year Bible College Long service medal, 3rd class In Love With Zeke

 
Posts: 5,978
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: A road of rocks and glass
Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Deaner will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 01:30 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr_Ass View Post
YOU HERETIC, HELL AWAITS YOU

Welcome friend. Are you trying to be the talking donkey from the Bible?
Reply With Quote
(#5)
Old
St James of England St James of England is offline
Unsaved trash
 
  
Posts: 51
Join Date: Apr 2008
St James of England is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 01:36 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
Ok, let me see if I've got this straight. We have the Bible which explains the glory of man, covering the entire history of mankind and explaining what happens when you die...

Then some guy comes along and tells you Jesus is a queer and your ancestors were monkeys and you bought that? Friend you're an idiot.

You have the bible written by charles darwin in 1700s
if you had read it youll realise that your an ape :themo nkey:: themonkey::themon key::t hemonkey::themonk ey::th emonkey::themonke y::the monkey:thats what we all technically are, your one of them

Psalm 14:1 The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
Reply With Quote
(#6)
Old
Ezekiel Bathfire's Avatar
Ezekiel Bathfire Ezekiel Bathfire is offline
Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
Christ's Rottweiler
 

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year 1st Year Bible College 2nd Year Bible College 3rd Year Bible College 4th Year Bible College True Christian™ The Al E. Pistle Award for Excellence in Rebuking Christian Love Real American™ Tithing Manager Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS True Scientist™ Pastor of GOD Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Senior Pastor Teabag Patriot TC Bravery Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant The Hatchet Child Rearing Award Ex-Brit Eats the Most Pork True Republican Ex-eurotrash Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Nuts for JESUS! Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Stamp of Approval Rick Perry's Niggerhead Ranch Mower Donald Trump 2016! Anti-sodomy Pastor Ezekiel Aardvark Bathfire Crown of Life Alternative Facts Probing for Jesus 20,000 posts Saved 10 Years Proud TP Rebuker for Christ Anti-Biden

 
Posts: 22,745
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Toiling selflessly towards Salvation
Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Ezekiel Bathfire will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 02:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by St James of England View Post
You have the bible written by charles darwin in 1700s
Charles Robert Darwin (12 February 1809 – 19 April 1882)
King James Bible 1611

1700s? God cursed your brain and you get everything wrong! Good, Praised be The Lord!




“We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

Author of such illuminating essays as,
Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
Reply With Quote
(#7)
Old
Dr. Otto Bond Sr.'s Avatar
Dr. Otto Bond Sr. Dr. Otto Bond Sr. is offline
Away on vacation, or very possibly deceased
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
  
Posts: 177
Join Date: Feb 2008
Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.Dr. Otto Bond Sr. has bribed people to get these reputation points.
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 04:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by St James of England View Post
Dear Charles Darwin
You told us of your storys
and showed us how were related to monkeys
we thank thee for telling us of Jesus being a homer
we thank thee for your effort in making us normal
to being atheist

ah men
Saint? Yeah right. Are you one of those Hell-bound cathyolics? You better get right with Jesus before He loses His patience with you and drop-kicks your sorry ass right into the pits of Hell!
Reply With Quote
(#8)
Old
King Darwin's Avatar
King Darwin King Darwin is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
  
Posts: 3
Join Date: Apr 2008
King Darwin is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 06:10 PM
what an excellent prayer
made me cry

Reply With Quote
(#9)
Old
Nobar King's Avatar
Nobar King Nobar King is offline
Municipal Code Archivist - Deuteronomy 28:58
Christ's Guardian
True Christian™

One Year/1000 posts Saved 1 Year True Christian™ True Christian Provider™ award Ribfest '07 Christian Love Tin Tither Real American™ Cleanest Kitchen Mission to Australia Heaven Bound Tagging for Jesus Protected by JESUS Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award True Christian Hotrodder Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian True Christian Nerd TC Bravery Ex-liberal Ex-Christ-Killer Friend of Jesus Flat Earth Saved 5 Years Tell her once Persecuted Porn Resistant Pro-Life 20,000 posts Eats the Most Pork True Republican Divorcee Batman Shooting Survivor Loves a GODLY Chic-Fil-A Early riser Guns, Guts and GLORY! Proud Niglet Sponsorer Kirk Cameron Fan Club Prayer Warrior Touched by Jesus Grammar Nazi Pancake Dinner Anti-sodomy Hands Off Pastor Ezekiel Cup of Jesus Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016! Proud Survivor of the Overwatch Wars Wall of Jesus Alternative Facts Saved 10 Years

 
Posts: 23,743
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Mostly on the front porch.
Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Nobar King will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 06:15 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by King Darwin View Post
what an excellent prayer
made me cry
He's an emo. Do you have your little pocket pillow with you to cry on?

May you be a blessing to every life you touch.
Reply With Quote
(#10)
Old
King Darwin's Avatar
King Darwin King Darwin is offline
Confirmed Enemy of God
BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
  
Posts: 3
Join Date: Apr 2008
King Darwin is under investigation -- suspected to be Unsaved Trash.
Default Re: I wrote this prayer for you all - 04-24-2008, 06:16 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nobar King View Post
He's an emo. Do you have your little pocket pillow with you to cry on?
by bible do you simply mean a porn magazine?
Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Find Additional Forums Here



Powered by Jesus - vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Content Landover Baptist Forums © 1620, 2022 all rights reserved

Send an email to the Senior Pastor - Landover Baptist Church - Top