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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 02:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
There are no forums up in Heaven.
Are you suuure?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke
And there are certainly no privileges for obese degenerates like you.
No exceptions?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke
In fact one of the things I and most True Christians™ are looking forward to being able to watch scum like you down in the underworld while you are anally sodomized <-- redundant by every demon in hell. Oh how we'll laugh as we listen to your screams and watch your agony unfold as we enjoy a cold beer up in Heaven with our loving Savior.
Joke's on you because I wrote the book on anal sex! Well, taught the class. In any case, HA!


This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN
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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 04:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke
...anally sodomized <-- redundant...
...
Nope.

sodomy
[sod-uh-mee]
noun
1. anal or oral copulation with a member of the opposite sex.
2. copulation with a member of the same sex.
3. bestiality (def 4).


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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 06:27 PM

Okay, yes, that's true, but I'm pretty sure that the most commonly used definition of "sodomy" is "anal intercourse"; like, the average person on the street would hear the term and think "buttsecks".


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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 07:57 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
...the average person on the street would hear the term and think "buttsecks".
And that's exactly why it's our duty to correct their errors. They need to know that, according to the Bible, Jesus righteously hates them for the blowjobs and clittylicking just as much as for the fudgepacking.


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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 08:37 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by WickedWitch View Post
Okay, yes, that's true, but I'm pretty sure that the most commonly used definition of "sodomy" is "anal intercourse"; like, the average person on the street would hear the term and think "buttsecks".
Quote:
Originally Posted by Didymus Much View Post
And that's exactly why it's our duty to correct their errors. They need to know that, according to the Bible, Jesus righteously hates them for the blowjobs and clittylicking just as much as for the fudgepacking.
Now You Look Right Here!

Stop this filthy pervert talk RIGHT NOW! This is God's favorite forum, not queer locker room in Jew York City! I'm going to have both of you BANNED PERMANENTLY if you don't clean up your potty mouths. This is a family forum! Women read these threads, and so does Jesus.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 09:14 PM

I want to see again all the people I love and those who left for Heaven before me. Pets, relatives, friends and more, I want to spend the whole eternity with them and share nice moments again
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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 09:17 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnimeAndMangaLover View Post
I want to see again all the people I love and those who left for Heaven before me. Pets, relatives, friends and more, I want to spend the whole eternity with them and share nice moments again
Aaaaaand, that's NOT gonna happen (according to the Bible). Read it to find out why.


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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 09:34 PM

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Originally Posted by Didymus Much View Post
Aaaaaand, that's NOT gonna happen (according to the Bible). Read it to find out why.
If you don't mind, I rather read your opinion
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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 09:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnimeAndMangaLover View Post
If you don't mind, I rather read your opinion
Didymus Much is an atheist, an Arrogant Atheist Dick to be more precise. I doubt he has an opinion on what Heaven should be like, nor what you want Heaven to be like. I think Didymus is asking another question: That you read the Bible so you can make an informed decision.


Jeremiah 6:21 Therefore thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will lay stumblingblocks before this people, and the fathers and the sons together shall fall upon them; the neighbour and his friend shall perish.

Best wishes for the people in Ukraine.
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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 11:22 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnimeAndMangaLover View Post
I want to see again all the people I love and those who left for Heaven before me. Pets, relatives, friends and more, I want to spend the whole eternity with them and share nice moments again
Woah!!
Back up the truck, pervert!

At this rate, your family reunion will be held along the shores of the lake of fire, where your, and your loved ones, worms shall never die. There will be no laughter, nor joy, neither hugs nor kisses; only an infinity of weeping and wailing as you are skewered rectally on satan's girthy choad and roasted like a pig on a spit over undying flame, forever. So cut the happy-˘r@ppy h0r$€ $h!t and get with the program, son.
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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 11:28 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
Woah!!
Back up the truck, pervert!

At this rate, your family reunion will be held along the shores of the lake of fire, where your, and your loved ones, worms shall never die. There will be no laughter, nor joy, neither hugs nor kisses; only an infinity of weeping and wailing as you are skewered rectally on satan's girthy choad and roasted like a pig on a spit over undying flame, forever. So cut the happy-˘r@ppy h0r$€ $h!t and get with the program, son.
Where's Christian love here? Why should I go to hell? Give me a reason please. Oh, and by the way, don't call me son, I'm a girl
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Arrow Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 11:32 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnimeAndMangaLover View Post
Where's Christian love here? Why should I go to hell? Give me a reason please. Oh, and by the way, don't call me son, I'm a girl
Gender confusion is yet another reason why God hates you, boy. Buck up and take your rebuke like a man!
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obese mexican pig piffleer obese mexican pig piffleer is offline
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obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 11:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Witch Hammer View Post
Gender confusion is yet another reason why God hates you, boy. Buck up and take your rebuke like a man!
I'm a girl, what made you think I was a man?
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Witch Hammer Witch Hammer is offline
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2010 Witch Hunt Award One Year/1000 posts 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Christian Provider™ award Pro-Life True Christian™ Friend of Jesus Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Porn Resistant Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Pro-Life True Republican Saved 5 Years Tell her once Christian Love The Lord’s Witness Wound Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Flat Earth Persecuted Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Punched the most queers Eats the Most Pork Kirk Cameron Fan Club Mission to Korea Uber Angels Driver Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016!

 
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Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Angry Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-13-2015, 11:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnimeAndMangaLover View Post
I'm a girl, what made you think I was a man?
Your username, AnimalAndGaymanLover. You are obviously a sodomite of the lowest caliber.
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Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-14-2015, 03:38 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AnimalAndGaymanLover (aka pervert) View Post
Where's Christian love here? Why should I go to hell? Give me a reason please.
You are going to spend eternity being tortured in hell because you are a godmocking pervert. Did you imagine that you could gain entry to Heaven just because you're "nice?" Is that how you think it works?

Better read THIS and repent before it's too late.


Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.obese mexican pig piffleer is a sinner who has rejected Christ and tithing to Landover and is on the fast bus to Aeternal Damnation.
Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-18-2015, 05:23 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
You are going to spend eternity being tortured in hell because you are a godmocking pervert. Did you imagine that you could gain entry to Heaven just because you're "nice?" Is that how you think it works?

Better read THIS and repent before it's too late.
So a lunatic who hates life has more right to go to heaven? Your "heaven" sounds very strange
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Witch Hammer Witch Hammer is offline
True Christian™
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2010 Witch Hunt Award One Year/1000 posts 2011 Witch Hunt Award True Christian Provider™ award Pro-Life True Christian™ Friend of Jesus Christian Love Real American™ Heaven Bound Protected by JESUS Ready for the Rapture True Christian Caucasian Porn Resistant Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Pro-Life True Republican Saved 5 Years Tell her once Christian Love The Lord’s Witness Wound Ex-Masturbator Super Soaker Baptism Award Flat Earth Persecuted Sons of Liberty Guns, Guts and GLORY! Prayer Warrior Proud Niglet Sponsorer Hatchet Child Rearing Award Punched the most queers Eats the Most Pork Kirk Cameron Fan Club Mission to Korea Uber Angels Driver Trump of GOD Donald Trump 2016!

 
Posts: 1,716
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Location: In the midst of His Will®
Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!Witch Hammer will sit at the right hand of Jesus Himself come the Glory!
Default Re: Things you're looking forward to in Heaven. - 07-18-2015, 05:51 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by obese mexican pig piffleer View Post
So a lunatic who hates life has more right to go to heaven? Your "heaven" sounds very strange
You've got a mouth on you, fellatrice. I'm sure satan will put it to good use when you get to hell.
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