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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-24-2007, 08:56 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
And, of course, if you have accepted JESUS and Landover Baptist, you live forever.
I thought that was obvious to all sinners, even Shoelace.

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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-24-2007, 09:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tommy View Post
Well, beagles were, as every other being on Earth, intelligently designed...
But beagles themselves are not intelligent, and being animals have no souls. Therefore, you're not a beagle but possibly one of those sick sinners who like to dress up in animal costumes and fornicate with each other (I hope you're not, and that you're just playing around pretending to be one). My suspicion about "furries" is that they know they are damned to Hell, but rather than turning to Jesus and repenting, they are so terrified they pretend to be creatures without souls. God is not fooled, and they will know of their folly when they end up roasting like pigs on spits in Hell.

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1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-24-2007, 10:35 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brother Temperance View Post
Not nearly as many spiders as there are in HELL, witch!
Please don't mention spiders.

Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
Imagine, Rachael . . . you're in the waiting line for Hell, and you start feeling little tendrils of heat on your legs . . . you look down, and see that the floor is awash in flaming spiders, some of which are running up your legs, setting your clothes ablaze and seeking points of entry! You try to knock them off, but a demon grabs your arms so you're helpless as the burning spiders crawl all over you, and lo, they find those points of entry!
Please don't mention spiders finding points of entry!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
LITTLE?!?!? Look at the venom dripping out of the fangs of this horrid demon!
Can you post the image, Pastor? That link is blocked by surf control (which probably has a lot more sense than I do for asking )

And enough with the spiders!!!!!! I HATE spiders!!!! I hate bugs in general but I'm really not fond of spiders!! (Although roaches and millipedes are still worse)
Seriously, talk about the demon sodomy all you want (I have nooo problem with that ) but enough with the spiders!!!!


Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 12:21 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
Can you post the image, Pastor?
Of course, dear. This is Atrax Robustus, but you will know it as the Sydney Funnelweb. The picture is almost to scale.
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 12:59 AM

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuggggggg ggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!!!!!!
*shudder* *shudder* *shudder*


Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 02:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tommy View Post
I may be just a foreign beagle hound but I sense some bad karma around here...
Karma is an imaginary force created by Hindus, Tommy. Christians don't need to imagine that karma will repay people. We have Jesus to do that!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
Seriously, talk about the demon sodomy all you want (I have nooo problem with that ) but enough with the spiders!!!!
You do realize that the sodomizing demons can take any form God decides, right?
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 02:53 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by OnYourKnees View Post
You do realize that the sodomizing demons can take any form God decides, right?
I know what you're going to suggest and I NEVER want to hear it!!


Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 02:58 AM
Anything but surrendering to JESUS! That's what the HEATHEN SINNERS do! Anything BUT surrender to JESUS!! This feng shoe stuff ain't going to get nobody nothing in the end except a reserved ticket on the Hell Train Express!!

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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 07:34 AM
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Originally Posted by Brother Love View Post
Anything but surrendering to JESUS! That's what the HEATHEN SINNERS do! Anything BUT surrender to JESUS!! This feng shoe stuff ain't going to get nobody nothing in the end except a reserved ticket on the Hell Train Express!!
Thanks for that very honest explanation of (I'd rather not speak chineeese so I won't even say it, in case the Lord might confuse me with some Godless boodist). Anyway, I know this gal who broke her ankle when she tried to hang a crystal from the doorway of her mobile home. We have nothing to learn from folKs who can't even keep their windows clean and insist on dining on our pets! DISGUSTED GLENDORA

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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 01:32 PM
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Originally Posted by Brother Love View Post
Anything but surrendering to JESUS! That's what the HEATHEN SINNERS do! Anything BUT surrender to JESUS!! This feng shoe stuff ain't going to get nobody nothing in the end except a reserved ticket on the Hell Train Express!!
Yes, indeed, Brother. It's amazing what nonsense people will believe instead of believing in the God of the Bible, who temporarily sacrificed Himself to Himself to satisfy a law that He Himself had ordained, just so that those same wicked sinners could be Saved®. Instead of following the ancient oriental art of rearranging their furniture so that the devil can move about more easily, maybe those people should stop inviting the devil into their homes at all and invite Jesus instead.

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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 03:28 PM
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Originally Posted by More Saved Than Thou View Post
Instead of following the ancient oriental art of rearranging their furniture so that the devil can move about more easily, maybe those people should stop inviting the devil into their homes at all and invite Jesus instead.
I thought this fang shoe stuff was a sexual cult filled with disappointed women. You see, my theroy is simple: Unsaved women become dissatisfied with their unsaved, heathen men. They go to one of these brainwashing centers, where some guy/guys will take advantage of them.

If only they had True Christian husbands. They'd never be disappointed. A True Christian husband would keep them busy in the bedroom and out of it. Cooking, cleaning, obeying their husband in all things, and 'other' duties are what a woman is made for.

"If thou buy an Hebrew servant, six years he shall serve: and in the seventh he shall go out free for nothing. . . . And if a man sell his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go out as the manservant's do."
(Leviticus 21:6-7)
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 04:54 PM
I don't know which is worse: rejecting feng shui just because it's Asian or repackaging it in commodified, Americanized form. Neither one is particularly multicultural.
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 05:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Glendora Christianson View Post
Anyway, I know this gal who broke her ankle when she tried to hang a crystal from the doorway of her mobile home. We have nothing to learn from folKs who can't even keep their windows clean and insist on dining on our pets! DISGUSTED GLENDORA
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Why would you know a gal who lives in a mobile home? I don't recall those being allowed in Freehold.

Is she a servant of yours?
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 07:03 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Darren Ingram-Myers View Post
I don't know which is worse: rejecting feng shui just because it's Asian or repackaging it in commodified, Americanized form. Neither one is particularly multicultural.
We don't reject it because it's Ajun, Susie. We reject it because it's unGodly. We're not racists like demoncrats and lieberals.

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1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 08:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
We don't reject it because it's Ajun, Susie. We reject it because it's unGodly. We're not racists like demoncrats and lieberals.
. .. or Nuwaubians.
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 08:38 PM
Asians are indeed strange ones...

what's wrong with them?

I wish I were asian...liar
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-25-2007, 08:47 PM
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Originally Posted by Rextopherious View Post
Asians are indeed strange ones...

what's wrong with them?

I wish I were asian...liar
Talk to Hitoshima.

The Lord is a man of war: the Lord is his name.
Exodus 15:3

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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-26-2007, 01:28 AM
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Originally Posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
We don't reject it because it's Ajun, Susie. We reject it because it's unGodly. We're not racists like demoncrats and lieberals.
You people are more prejudiced and racist than KKK members...
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-26-2007, 02:13 AM
We aren't prejudice, friend! We just say it like it is according to the Holy Bible KJV1611 which most of this HEATHEN PLANET can't deal with right now! There's no room in the Bible for "pc" which is a SATANIC Communist false doctrine, by the way! Now you can call us whatever you want BUT understand one thing, friend. When you do so you are also calling JESUS the same thing. Think about it, friend. Think about it before it's too late! REPENT and turn to the LORD!

Evangelist for Jesus and The Word!!

"Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves." Matthew 7:15

"Prayer should be your first resource. Not your last resort!!"
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Default Re: Superstitious Nonsense: Feng Shui - 01-26-2007, 02:43 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyrone Shoelaces View Post
You people are more prejudiced and racist than KKK members...
Prove it. I defy you to find one single post from any True Christian™ on these Godly boards that even approaches prejudice or racism. We do not tolerate such things.

You sound like the pot who called the kettle black. You are the most bigoted anti-Christian hatemonger I have encountered in ages.

Who Will Jesus Damn?

Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!
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