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Promise Enforcers - Men Only! We make Promise Keepers look like homers! No homosexuals or women allowed!

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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-18-2011, 11:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by a goth scum View Post
What do you call a pig crossed with a woman : me
What do you call a female goth?

A fucking slut.
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a goth scum is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.a goth scum is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.a goth scum is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-18-2011, 11:43 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deaner View Post
What do you call a female goth?

A fucking slut.
haha, what do you call very christian on the planet?

wrong.


A whip for the horse, a bridle for the ass, and a rod for the fool's back. Proverbs 26:3
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-18-2011, 11:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by a goth scum View Post
haha, what do you call very christian on the planet?

wrong.
Don't worry, not everyone can tell a joke. Still, little consentration would not hurt you.
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a goth scum is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.a goth scum is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.a goth scum is a sorcerer and idolater who follows false gods and will rot in Hell.
Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-18-2011, 11:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alphonse Alban View Post
Don't worry, not everyone can tell a joke. Still, little consentration would not hurt you.
tell a joke, generally people don't find sexism funny, but guess on this website it's the norm and that's why most people don't like you.


A whip for the horse, a bridle for the ass, and a rod for the fool's back. Proverbs 26:3
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-18-2011, 11:59 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by a goth scum View Post
tell a joke, generally people don't find sexism funny, but guess on this website it's the norm and that's why most people don't like you.
Actually most people like us. It's just very small minority that comes to complain here.
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-19-2011, 12:08 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by a goth scum View Post
tell a joke, generally people don't find sexism funny, but guess on this website it's the norm and that's why most people don't like you.
Looks like you can tell a joke, after all. That's a real knee-slapper!
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-19-2011, 06:02 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by wrongpathtaker View Post
Women are equals, YOU IDIOTS !
Women are equals..now that's funny...


Jeremiah 23:29 Is not my word like as a fire? saith the LORD; and like a hammer that breaketh the rock in pieces?

Ephesians 6:11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-19-2011, 04:15 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAmazingMonkeyGod View Post
Woman was formed from man by man's rib. So woman is man. You guys treat woman like slaves. Slavery is wrong.

You came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from transgender. That transgender came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. So yeah.
That's not even slightly funny



Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
The truth about volcanos
Sex and debauchery in public schools
Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-19-2011, 05:42 PM

Here is a good one;

What do you call a Goth with a razor.

A bloody mess!

(they cut themselves, get it?)



Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

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Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-19-2011, 09:21 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby-Joe View Post
Here is a good one;

What do you call a Goth with a razor.

A bloody mess!

(they cut themselves, get it?)
I don't care who you are, you have to admit ''that is funny''!


1 Chronicles 16:15
Be ye mindful always of his covenant; the word which he commanded to a thousand generations ... an everlasting covenant.
Proverbs 30:5,6: Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.

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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-19-2011, 09:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAmazingMonkeyGod View Post
Woman was formed from man by man's rib. So woman is man. You guys treat woman like slaves. Slavery is wrong.

You came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from woman. That woman came from transgender.
Just because a boy is wearing lipstick, that doesn't mean he can give birth. Idiot.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishsucker View Post
Sexist Biatches take note on:
Ephesians 5:25-33
Colossians 3:19
Genesis 2:18, 20-24 < the rib bone represented equality between man and woman
Um, what? Since when were bones equal to people? You have might difficulty outwitting a spare rib, but that's not normally the case.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MyAmazingMonkeyGod View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alphonse Alban View Post
Ephesians 5:23-24 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

Now, where in the bible does it say that you can treat her like sh*t?
He's the head. He can do what he likes. In the unlikely event that you ever get a job, you can try to explain to your head of department that you're equal, and him being your head doesn't give him any power over you. You might not last very long in that job, though.


O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.


God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-21-2011, 10:07 AM

Have those little hellbound hackers found a way into here again? They need something to keep their attention for more than two seconds (as well as dropping to their knees and accepting the warm love of Jesus into their hearts).

A priest, a rabbi, and a Godly pastor walk into Freehold. The Godly pastor drops to the ground...


"If thou buy an Hebrew servant, six years he shall serve: and in the seventh he shall go out free for nothing. . . . And if a man sell his daughter to be a maidservant, she shall not go out as the manservant's do."
(Leviticus 21:6-7)
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Smile Re: Manly Jokes - 09-21-2011, 10:33 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Some God-hater View Post
Slavery is wrong.

Why must you hate God's word?
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-21-2011, 03:47 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Isaac Fisher View Post
hate God's word
Towel Heads




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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-22-2011, 12:36 AM

Why do women need to learn self-defense?

Because the stove might attack them.



The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
- Proverbs 15:3

CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 09-22-2011, 11:08 AM

A pastor a Schoolboy a Jew and the Boy's grandad were inside a airplane that went down.
There were 3 parachutes in the plane.
The Jew rushed and took one, and the rest just mumbled...

The Pastor said; My village need me for a wedding tomorrow. he said and they gave him a Parachute.

Then the boy's granddad said; Hear my boy... go ahead and take the last parachute.... i've lived my life and im ready to see the lord's light.

then the boy said; but granddad! there are still 2 parachutes left, That stupid Jew took my schoolbag!
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 10-22-2011, 10:57 PM

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?

Slap her in the face.
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 10-22-2011, 11:46 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Swedsoldier View Post
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Slap her in the face.
Your girlfriend must be the luckiest girl on the planet with such a nice boyfriend... If you even have one...




Jesus loves you seriously bigtime. He’d hug you until your eyeballs exploded out of your skull if he ever met you. He’d windsurf across oceans of dead Nazis which he personally slaughtered just to tell you that your new haircut is the bee’s knees. Jesus is like the monster truck of love and you are an old Geo Metro which he will roar his massive engine over and crush your pathetic fiberglass frame into a crumpled heap. Praise Jesus, especially when it’s sunny outside because Jesus would totally be cool with you praising while you get a nice tan.

- Ecclesiastes xii.7
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 10-23-2011, 01:56 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Swedsoldier View Post
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?

Slap her in the face.
Hahaha! I think you deserve a 'tell her once' award, friend.
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Default Re: Manly Jokes - 10-23-2011, 10:27 AM

Thanks!

Oh how I love manly jokes.

"I love watching women's heavyweight boxing.
It's hilarious to see them fight back tears when the announcer tells everyone their weight"

"I had a Jehovah's Witness at the door this morning and he said they can predict what will happen in the future.

Bullshit, he didn't even try and duck when I punched him in the face"
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