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  • Santa watches over us like Jesus?

    A Special Message from Santa Claus

    Season's greetings from your old friend Santa! My, oh, my, only 12 nights left until Christmas Eve! Things are getting so close now, we can hardly contain ourselves here at the North Pole. And from the looks of it, my young friend, we're not the only ones set to burst! Why, Jolly Old Saint Nick hasn't seen a Yule log this lit in ages!


    Now, don't be shy. You know what Santa's talking about.
    I spent a good hour washing out my eyes after this. My childhood has been ruined. *sob*
    Tir'd, and despairing, O celestial maid,
    I'm caught, I cry'd, without thy heav'nly aid.
    Help me, Diana, help a nymph forlorn,
    Devoted to the woods, who long has worn
    Thy livery, and long thy quiver born.
    - Ovid

  • #2
    Re: Santa watches over us like Jesus?

    Originally posted by Arethusa View Post
    I spent a good hour washing out my eyes after this. My childhood has been ruined. *sob*
    You should warn people before sending them to such a vile link. Ladies, this Message from Satan Santa describes self-abuse most foul. Please cover your eyes that you not sully your minds with its depravity! Click away! Click away!

    And yes, Arethusa. Jesus watches over us JUST like the mythical Santa Clawsus would, if he were Jesus. He knows EXACTLY what you got in your eye, young lady!

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    • #3
      Re: Santa watches over us like Jesus?

      Originally posted by Arethusa View Post
      A Special Message from Santa Claus

      I spent a good hour washing out my eyes after this. My childhood has been ruined. *sob*
      Young lady, you have already been warned about the depravity of santan claws. You have no business wandering into pornographic websites like that. Just take my word for it: everything you have ever been told about santan and false Christian "X-mas" is a demonic lie. Study the Holy Bible and spend more time baking cupcakes and snickerdoodles. You don't want to meet up with this revolting fellow, now do you?
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Santa watches over us like Jesus?

        Pornography is the LUST for SATAN!

        That Santa is a invention of HEATHENS! In reality, Santa is DEMON straight out of the PIT!! Yet, another ABOMINATION in the eyes of the LORD!!

        If any of you have even ONE picture of that DEMON Santa in your house then your house is considered a HARLOT'S NEST in the eyes of the Lord!! And YES Santa is a SINFUL HARLOT because he dresses in RED, the DEVIL'S own color and the color of WHORES!! I bet that he also throws on some RUBY RED lipstick and maybe even some EYE SHADOW! I bet he wears women's PANTIES under that RED costume. The kind you see in Victoria's Secret (and we all know what that HARLOT'S secret is don't we!!). And he burglarizes homes in the midst of the night hoping to meet up with little children! Santa is a DEMON MOLESTER folks!! Can't ya'll see through it? Respecting Santa is respecting a MOLESTER!! He's a dirty old PERVERT! A DEMON dressed in RED and wearing string panties under his suit jist like that Michael Jackson fella!!

        All this SIN about Santa is jist ONE MORE heathen TRICK to get the focus of CHRISTMAS off of CHRIST and onto the DEVIL!!
        Evangelist for Jesus and The Word!!

        "Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves." Matthew 7:15


        "Prayer should be your first resource. Not your last resort!!"

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        • #5
          Re: Santa watches over us like Jesus?

          Pastor, you inspired me. (I must confess that it was made with soymilk. Forgive me.)
          Attached Files
          Tir'd, and despairing, O celestial maid,
          I'm caught, I cry'd, without thy heav'nly aid.
          Help me, Diana, help a nymph forlorn,
          Devoted to the woods, who long has worn
          Thy livery, and long thy quiver born.
          - Ovid

          Comment

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