[WickedWitch]

Re: Dear Friends

Praise the Lord, this is good news. Your uterus is not harboring the antichrist... yet. Not to late to repent and find Jesus; although I think in your case you will need a map, GPS and 3000 foot road signs to do so.

I'm sorry, but you, like, just joined here this month - exactly who are you and what authority are you supposed to have that I should be taking your criticism?

You doctor is from India. That explains everything. Why didn't he see these 'cysts' before they got big and exploded? Because we didn't do the ultrasound in time and didn't know they were there to begin with. In fact, since when do cysts explode? When they get too big, they do sometimes burst. I suspect you have the Black Syph.

I suspect I had ovarian cysts. Although I do think another doctor might have been more helpful...


Dr. Goojha: "So, the ultrasound results are back. You still have adenomyosis, we expected that because it can't be cured, only treated. You had ovarian cysts, which is where the pain came from; then they burst, which caused much more pain. You still have some fluid in your abdominal cavity, but that will be absorbed into your body." (<-- Still sounding intelligent at this point.)
Alie: "Did the bursting cause any damage to my ovaries?"
Dr. Goojha: "I dunno." (<-- Not sounding like such a smart guy anymore.)
Alie: "Did the cysts comprimise fertility at all?"
Dr. Goojha: "I dunno."
Alie: "Will there be more cysts?"
Dr. Goojha: "Maybe. They usually recur."
Alie: "What will we do if they do?"
Dr. Goojha: "Depends."
Alie: "On what?"
Dr. Goojha: "On whether or not they burst again."
(Deciding this man knew nothing about my ovaries, I switched to that other annoying and pain-causing organ.)
Alie: "Can we tell if the adenomyosis has caused enough damage to my uterus to prevent me from being able to carry a child?"
Dr. Goojha: "I dunno."

If it weren't so scary, I'd laugh.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Dear Friends

That's what you get for living in Cannuckistan, Alllie. Give up your witchcraft and Jesus might just reward you with healed ovaries and a Green Card.

[WickedWitch]

Re: Dear Friends

That's what you get for living in Culturally Diverse and Accepting Canada, Alie. Give up your witchcraft No. and Jesus might just reward you with healed ovaries and a Green Card.

Why would I need a Green Card?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Dear Friends

Why would I need a Green Card?

So you can keep living there as a foreigner after we invade Canada and graciously allow you to become the 52nd. state (right after Cuba).

[WickedWitch]

Re: Dear Friends

So you can keep living there as a foreigner after we invade Canada and graciously allow you to become the 52nd. state (right after Cuba).

HA! That's, that's just never gonna happy, darling. It's a funny thought, but it's just not in the cards. Sorry.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Dear Friends

HA! That's, that's just never gonna happy, darling. It's a funny thought, but it's just not in the cards. Sorry.

That's what the Japs said.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Dear Friends

HA! That's, that's just never gonna happy, darling. It's a funny thought, but it's just not in the cards. Sorry.

Not only is it in the cards, it's an historical inevitability. Out southern states are drying up and the Meskins are pouring across the border. Oh sure, we can keep shooting them, but eventually there will be no point. Everything south of Kansas will be the Sonoran desert.

We do appreciate you caretaking our land until we need it, but we will need it within a couple of years. Don't get uppity and act like it's yours. If you try to pre-steal it you will have to go off to reservations.

[WickedWitch]

Re: Dear Friends

That's what the Japs said.

Not only is it in the cards, it's an historical inevitability. Out southern states are drying up and the Meskins are pouring across the border. Oh sure, we can keep shooting them, but eventually there will be no point. Everything south of Kansas will be the Sonoran desert.

We do appreciate you caretaking our land until we need it, but we will need it within a couple of years. Don't get uppity and act like it's yours. If you try to pre-steal it you will have to go off to reservations.

You guys are really good at wishful thinking. All right, well whatever floats your boats.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Dear Friends

You guys are really good at wishful thinking. All right, well whatever floats your boats.

I just upheld your prominent-if-sinful presence on this GODLY board from a chickenhawk and provided you with a REAL medical diagnosis. You owe me your life as well as an unpaid cheese debt!

I expect you to be at the border checkpoint when you hear the radio signal "Who Killed Cock Robin" repeated three times at midnight. It signals that the invasion is beginning. You must activate your French fifth-column fighters and be prepared to surrender before some Canuskistani decides to fight.

[WickedWitch]

Re: Dear Friends

Pastor Al, I do so love you. Of course, I knew you only had my best interests at heart with your suggestion.

[Rachael Van Helsing]

Re: Dear Friends

Awww Alie I'm sorry to hear about this. Glad to hear that the cysts are no longer, though. Here's hoping they never come back!

**See? I don't you they wouldn't need to cut out your uterus.

[SUV]

Re: Dear Friends

Alie, it is Blessed to learn that you are now working on getting better. And perhaps your recent Pain has caused you to reflect upon the Agonies of JESUS as He truged up His Hill in His Sandals wearing His Crown o' Thorns, bearing His Cross...well, you know the drill.

And now I ask that you Ladies return the favor and Pray for Me. You see, God, in His Vast Wisdom, has caused a wisdom tooth to erupt after many years from my gum sideways into the tooth that needs a filling.

Gonna be some Pain there - you'd Better Believe It®

[Wide-Open]

Re: Dear Friends

bearing His Cross...well, you know the drill.

I was going to suggest that might be one of her problems

And now I ask that you Ladies return the favor and Pray for Me. You see, God, in His Vast Wisdom, has caused a wisdom tooth to erupt after many years from my gum sideways into the tooth that needs a filling.

Gonna be some Pain there - you'd Better Believe It®

Sister, sometimes I think you ladies need a private section to discuss cooters, hair, and dental surgery. It would - given your complete lack of sense - be a total waste of disk space and bandwidth, but at LEAST I wouldn't be forced to read topics about ovaries (I don't know what they are, but it sounds absolutely disgusting - next thing you know the French name their eggs after it), nor would I have to read that your teeth might be related to "wisdom".

Men have wisdom, and related teeth. Can I suggest that we call your, um, situation, the emergence of an addle brained tooth that doesn't know if it should come up or not, or it would be great to, or not, or, oh look, my pie is burning, or, what was I saying, and where am I, tooth?

(In short the EOABTTDKIISCUONOIWBGTONOOLMPIBOWWISAWAI tooth. )

[SUV]

Re: Dear Friends

Why does GOD show the daffodils exactly where to bloom every year, but then this happens to Alie's over-y things and my tooth? Maybe it's because we can feel Pain the most and thereby learn to better appreciate JESUS' Sufferings for us.

I'm Certain© there must be reason in all of this seeming chaos

[Wide-Open]

Re: Dear Friends

I'm Certain© there must be reason in all of this seeming chaos

You could have said "No" to the talking snake Sister. Never say "Yes" to a talking snake. The Lord was perfectly clear on this one.