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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 02-25-2014, 07:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Laurence Niles View Post
I hate to say this but have you thought a more obvious answer than Jesus personally typed in those words for you?

That's right: one of your son's is gay. Or has been anally raped by a family friend or mentor.

Jesus has your back, friend. You need to see to your sons. Before it is too late.

On a lighter note, I'm available for private one to one counselling with the youth who turns out to have been up to anal antics to help bend him into shape (and I'll waiver the normal initial consultation fee).

YIC
I have been thinking about this, Brother Niles, and you might be right. It most likely wasn't Jesus typing that message to me, but He typed it to son. I have been trying to figure it out who of them it is, but I haven't been able to find out yet who is this sinner.

I'm not sure what to do. I think we need to arrange pastor to check their rectums to be sure. I hate to think what we might find out, but it's better to find out sooner than later, if one of them has been having anal sex. If this is the sad case, I think ex-Gay therapy is much easier to go through before the AIDS has truly sank in yet.
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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 02-25-2014, 11:43 PM

Easy solution - cast lots
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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 08-17-2015, 05:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zechariah Smyth View Post
Despite the unsettling message, I think we can all agree that yet another miracle has occurred that Jesus-haters will have a very difficult time explaining.

GOD WINS AGAIN!!!

Your signature makes me really angry, okay

'Straight Pride' is a homophobic, biphobic, bigoted thing created by whiny heteros like you.

You can't get kicked out of a restaurant because you're holding hands with your wife.

You can't get fired from work because you're married to a woman.

You won't have people leave you time and time again because you're straight and they don't want to catch the hetero bug from you.

So do the world a favor and shut the ***vulgarity removed by moderator*** up
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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 08-17-2015, 07:06 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emo Trash View Post

'Straight Pride' is a homophobic, biphobic, bigoted thing created by whiny heteros like you.




Do you mean to say that you can be proud for being a pervert, but normal people can't be proud for being normal?


No offense, but you talk like a Democrat.


God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11
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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 08-17-2015, 08:32 PM

Is there some reason why you are picking on Brother Zech in particular, Miss Trash?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Emo Trash View Post
'Straight Pride' is a homophobic, biphobic, bigoted thing ... blah blah blah
You forgot to mention pedophobic, panphobic, aphobic, pervophobic, lesbophobic and all the other lifestyles that you have chosen to espouse.

But you are wrong, and here is why. A phobia is an anxiety or fear of something. We Christians have no fear of you and your kind, or of your perversions.

2 Timothy 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.



Ecclesiastes 12:13

Let vs heare the conclusion of the whole matter: Feare God, and keepe his commandements, for this is the whole duetie of man.
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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 09-30-2015, 03:08 AM

Nice try you joke. Calculators don't type that on their own. You did that and took a pic just to make it a 'woe is me' situation
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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 09-30-2015, 06:30 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tennisguy101 View Post
Nice try you joke. Calculators don't type that on their own. You did that and took a pic just to make it a 'woe is me' situation
Are you bit slow? Of course calculators don't type on their own, it must have been Jesus who typed that message, it really is the only explanation. Besides, I can't think any reason why Jesus would joke about such matter.
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Default Re: Why does God think I'm a gaysexual? - 09-30-2015, 03:09 PM

With all the Anal Sex "Marriage" being legal I would not be surprised if Satan is putting this evil image in people's subconscious. Just to be safe I think that you should repent anyway


Proverbs 15:26 - The thoughts of the wicked [are] an abomination to the LORD: but [the words] of the pure [are] pleasant words

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