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Billy Bob Jenkins Billy Bob Jenkins is offline
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013
About as Straight and Manly as you can get
Hates anal sex. And trees.
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Default Re: Bell Ringer Gets Punched for Saying "Happy Holidays". - 12-17-2013, 07:29 PM

People who hate Jesus should not be allowed near bells, chimes, resonators, or even to hold a mallet, which can be used to strike a bell without much preparation. Satan is a learned campanologist, and is prepared to marshal peals of bells in his rape of the baby Jesus. Satan tends to prefer gook bells, such as the Suzu, the Zhong, or the Ghanta. There is nothing remotely Christian about a gook bell, or an atheist swinging one around shouting blasphemies at children. Catholics often employ bells to lure children into their breezy, seed-encrusted robes, but Catholic bells can be readily identified by their prurient iconography. Their resonance is also muffled by the layers of blood and semen caked upon them during mass. Even Satan tends to prefer gook bells to Catholic ones, because the Chinese are so numerous and burn just as well. But any tuned, percussion instrument can be deadly if it falls into the wrong hands, which includes anyone who takes the Christ out of Christmas.


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