Thread: Hiding Bruises
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Billy Bob Jenkins Billy Bob Jenkins is offline
Family Man of the Year 2010-2013
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Default Re: Hiding Bruises - 12-23-2011, 11:48 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Good Christian Woman View Post
Well ladies, it's time to share our secrets. The liebral media seems to think there's something wrong with a husband disciplining his wife when she sins, so it has become necessary for us to find ways to hide our marks of punishment.

Yesterday, I am ashamed to say I burned the pie I was making for my husband. He disciplined me accordingly, and I don't want my hippy neighbors asking questions about the bruises. Any advice on concealment? They're mostly around my eyes, so I can't cover them with clothing. I have no make up in my house (Only whores do!) so that's out as well. I could try sun glasses, but my husband says they make me look mannish, so I'd prefer to save those as a last resort. Any other ideas, ladies?
The simplest solution would be to just stay indoors. My wife Cindy Lou is never allowed outside. That means I have to take care of the yard work, but at least the liberal media won't be sniffing around her looking for bruises and open sores.

If there is an emergency, and you must go outside for some reason, perhaps during a blizzard as a punishment, then have the Reverend Jim Osborne perform a Christian laying on of hands. This is sure to cover up any unsightly topical damage.


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