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Default Re: God likes a good fart! - 01-22-2015, 12:16 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by HTannor View Post
Brother James Hutchins told me that the late Mrs. Hutchins was only allowed to "pass" while in her prayer closet.

He said the one time she didn't follow that rule was the day she fell down the well. Truly a tragic coincidence.
As the man of the house I of course make the rules. Rule #6 We are meat eaters. The only vegetables we consume are potatos; mashed, baked, or hash browned. Never cut into a "French Fry"; I will allow and encourage the frying of foods but Never into anything with a French name, and never in a shape resembling a small penis.

Karen made two mistakes in the first year of our marriage. #1 Telling me that lack of green vegetables made her constipated. ( PURE VEGAN HERACY ) #2 Going against God's will and sneaking some sort of fiber laxative into MY home and MY Wifes body.

She unleashed what can only be described as "Demonic death wind" out from under her floor length dress. And worse, it was what the kids call a "Shart".

The moral to this story is this: After a Godly Christian beating, being douced in bleach, and a few weeks in a local hospital ( Under protective custody, I am glad the local police were there to protect me from her sinful ways )... Well the woman I saw walking barefoot down the dirt road to my house was truly changed. She hasnt spoken a word in months, she hardly eats. The kids help change her colostomy bag, farting is a gift God has taken away from her.

Use it, dont abuse it ladies.
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