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Default Re: Pokemon Teaches Your Children Worship Satan - 02-15-2013, 03:33 AM

I was browsing through my tv channels one disturbing Saturday morning and I accidentally pressed on the wrong channel, but this blatant mockery of The Lord captivated me with demon magic. I watched two entire episodes. What I saw chilled me to the bone for weeks. I only was able to sleep about two hours a night, afraid that one of those demons would attack me. After hundreds of prayers and donations to the local church, the pastor told me that an angel would protect my house from these evil Pokedemons.
Pokemon is from hell because teaches kids that with demonic technology and a legion of six demonic minions will bring you fame and fortune. I was so scared when I saw the first little yellow fuzzy demon on the screen that I vacated my bowels instantly in my seat. The "show" progressed to a part where they address the evil theory of evolution. I could smell demons in the room with me as I watched the evolution in the show. After I managed to turn off the television by throwing a lamp into it I prayed for four hours straight and changed my pants afterwards. Praise Jesus.
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