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  • Pastor Ezekiel
    Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
     
    • Sep 2006
    • 78556

    #16
    Re: I'm Concerned That A Negro Might Inhabit The White House

    Originally posted by s@ul77 View Post
    Thankfully Jesus`s is not like you, Jesus knew the way to conquer evil was through love, Christians need to show love to those that maybe going down the wrong path, how can you bring people to the "Lord" when you vent so much hate.
    We are commanded to hate those that hate God.

    Psalm 139:19 Surely thou wilt slay the wicked, O God: depart from me therefore, ye bloody men.
    20 For they speak against thee wickedly, and thine enemies take thy name in vain.
    21 Do not I hate them, O LORD, that hate thee? and am not I grieved with those that rise up against thee?
    22 I hate them with perfect hatred: I count them mine enemies.
    Jesus hates you for lying about Him and being a unrepentant sodomite-lover, and so do I, as the Bible commands. Enjoy hell.
    Who Will Jesus Damn?

    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

    Comment

    • Pastor Al E Pistle
      Christ's Cōnsiliārius
       
      • Sep 2006
      • 9323

      #17
      Re: I'm Concerned That A Negro Might Inhabit The White House

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      I have never heard of any of those people, and I strongly suspect you made all that up. The name I highlighted is obviously a polack joo, for example.
      For the love of God, next she will be suggesting you listen to Bourbon Street Blues or will.i.am.

      I have just finished a select conference of prominent Christian Pastors, who have determined that, while President-elect Obama shouldn't technically be President, he was, in fact, raised in a White, Landover Baptist household, and his father contributed only a little melanin to his genetic profile, so he is scientifically a white Republican.

      President-elect Obama is in Hawaii right now and I have discussed the situation with him, after giving a prayer and condolences for his GODLY grandmother. He agrees that, while his skin color is unseemly, he will follow the Landover agenda just as the Bush family has always done, and accepted me as the family pastor. He offered to see the specialist who turned Michael Jackson's skin color into whatever shade of green it is, but I assured the President-Elect that was not necessary, and that Jackson is probably an alien in any case.

      So I am now able to say that a black African will never inhabit the White House, and that President-Elect Obama is whiter than most Andalusians, Belgian people or Norwegians.
      Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
      "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
      Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


      Comment

      • HotMomma
        Unsaved trash
        Under Investigation
        • Nov 2008
        • 1

        #18
        Re: I'm Concerned That A Negro Might Inhabit The White House

        It's not the White House anymore.... Now it's the White Crib.

        Comment

        • Father Maurice Lester
          Ring-kissing Papist dog
          • Sep 2006
          • 3366

          #19
          Re: I'm Concerned That A Negro Might Inhabit The White House

          Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle View Post
          ...I have just finished a select conference of prominent Christian Pastors...
          So I hear. The Denny's staff in Tulsa are still restocking the bacon supplies.

          Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
          ...he will follow the Landover agenda just as the Bush family has always done
          That is cheerful news indeed... your Supreme Court still needs four more Catholics to make it a full nine. Don't worry... we will get Roe V. Wade overturned!

          Originally posted by Pastor Al E Pistle
          President-Elect Obama is whiter than most Andalusians, Belgian people or Norwegians.
          However there is still the issue of the Democratic women of colour he is married to and sleeping with, as well as his appointments in waiting that include both genders in addition to a number of non-white minorities.


          Nice to know he is getting great advice though... he'll be getting some more when he meets with the Bishop's conference and eventually His Holiness The Pope.



          Bless you, my breakfast slammer,
          Father Mo



          .
          A Cardinal in the making.

          Comment

          • Wide-Open
            Director of European Evangelical Outreach
            A Shining Example of Christ's Love
            Quite possibly the only decent, heterosexual human being in the whole of Europe
            True Christian™
            • Nov 2007
            • 18449

            #20
            Re: I'm Concerned That A Negro Might Inhabit The White House

            Originally posted by Father Maurice Lester View Post
            Nice to know he is getting great advice though... he'll be getting some more when he meets with the Bishop's conference and eventually His Holiness The Pope.
            How dare you! Pastor Pistle brings us the BEST NEWS IN YEARS and thou pisseth on his procession!

            I just came ... off the phone with Pastor Al, and he suggested to me that Barack HUSSEIN Obama might not actually be his real name. Unconfirmed rumours have it that his real name is (wait for it):

            Really.

            Wait for it...


            Brock "Hoss" O'Bama.

            That's right.

            His friends used to call him "Paddy".

            Now... this (obviously GODLY) man probably knew what he was up against: all these jokes about Irish cathlycks... there was no way that America would accept him as a president, given the Nazi connection of your current boss. Oh well, the previous one was a commie, same diff.

            So, he - and his advisors - had a cunning plan (so cunning that it could only have been conceived at the Landover University of Cunningness (LUC): adopt a name that is more or less de rigueur in Kenya (where his melanine comes from). Sure, he'd lose a few votes here and there, but True Christians saw through that - heck, even the Joos did with their 77% of the votes going to Hoss.

            This is all starting to make sense now: JESUS wanted him to be President, and THAT's why He commanded me to accidently vote for him.

            I'm so happy I could CRY!

            The LORD doesn't make mistakes pal, and neither does Pastor Al pal. Stick that in your vatican chimney.
            Psalm 81:10:
            I am the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt:
            open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it.

            Comment

            • Wash O'Hanley
              Debate Moderator (and participant)
              Master Debater-- Has Never Been Defeated in a Debate
              Louder Than Reason
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 2126

              #21
              Re: I'm Concerned That A Negro Might Inhabit The White House

              Barack Obama hasn't even had a chance to measure the drapes in the White House and he's already laid the plans (undoubtedly with his best friend/adoptive father/possible gay partner Bill Ayers) for forced white servitude.

              The official website of President-Elect Barack Obama, Change.gov, originally announced that Obama would "require" all middle school through college students to participate in community service programs...
              http://worldnetdaily.com/index.php?f...w&pageId=80539


              Ohhhhhhhhh masa I ben workin'.

              Last time I checked there is no mention of community service in the Bible.
              sigpic

              Comment

              • Pastor Al E Pistle
                Christ's Cōnsiliārius
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 9323

                #22
                Re: I'm Concerned That A Negro Might Inhabit The White House

                In case no one remembers that I was WAY ahead of the curve on this one



                and, in fact, that ALL of my predictions, including the economic meltdown have been exactly accurate, this should be no surprise.

                I suspect it will be months yet before everyone realizes that my 'gloom and doom' posts are merely the description of the beginning of the prophecies of Revelation in our time, but by then it will be too late to thank me with your every possession so that JESUS and I can rest in comfort here and discuss the end of the world as it happens.
                Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University.
                "God loves you. Let us arrange for you to meet Him".
                Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth.--Psalms 58:6


                Comment

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