Re: A Poem about the Gospels
A Poem Based On 1 Thessalonians
We are Christians, we are holy, and just, and blameless! Be not like the Jews, who killed the Lord Jesus, and their own prophets, persecuted us, pleasing not God, contrary to all men, the wrath is come upon them to the uttermost! The Lord Jesus Christ is coming, wrote Paul, only some 1,900 years ago! Before we die, we shall see the rapture, wrote Paul, circa 52 AD! Prove all things, hold fast to what is good! Be good, people of Thessalonica, for the Lord Jesus Christ is coming soon! GLORY GLORY GLORY |
Re: A Poem about the Gospels
Well, that's it. I have finished. All 66 books of the Bible are represented here. It was been quite a pleasure to engage in this scriptural study, I thank all of the people who read through them with me.
I want to thank of course, the author of all these things, the Lord God Almighty, and all His holy secretaries, who preserved the words I have borrowed from: Moses, Joshua, Phinehas, Samuel, Gad, Nathan, Jeremiah, Ezra, Nehemiah, Mordecai, David, Asaph, Heman, Ethan, Solomon, Agur, Lemuel, Isaiah, Ezekiel, Daniel, Hosea, Joel, Amos, Obadiah, Jonah, Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk, Zephaniah, Haggai, Zechariah, Malachi, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Paul, James, Peter, and Jude. I also much in debt to a certain theologian by the name of Wells. So I guess I am going into poetic retirement, unless anyone has suggestions for other stuff I can write about. |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
I've read your poems to my little soldiers before bedtime. It moved their little hearts so much that they spent each night sweating and screaming Bible passages in their sleep.:innocent:
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Re: Poems about the Gospels
Thank you Nurse, I'm so pleased to know my works are being enjoyed.
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Re: Poems about the Gospels
I have a request!
Could you try writing a poem based on John 6? |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
Certainly, Father.
Oh, several years before the Last Supper. Jesus multiplied the fish and loaves. Afterwards He used figurative language to convey meaning as he often did. He said He was the Bread of Life Which of course is a metaphor But anyway this is not connected to the evil Catholic communion Since He was not referring to the incident that Catholics say started that rite. PRAISE BE TO GOD! |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
Matthew, Mark, Luke and John
The gosples keep me from wandering hither and yon Tho their words are hard to follow In Satans arms I will not wallow For today is the day I will not stray |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
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Can we hear poems about Tobit, Judith, Wisdom, Sirach, Baruch, and 1 & 2 Maccabees please? (If it's easier for you, maybe you can wrap them up into one big poem!) |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
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This maybe? There once was a nun from Cancun Nuttier than a loon Who longed for a Coon Who could make her heart swoon Her lust was strong For a man who was long As big as King Kong Who had a big bong But her lust for the drug In Gods eye made her a slug She was squashed like a bug On God's Holy rug Yours in Christ:jesus: Brother Lazarus |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
Sure thing, Father.
The Catholics being a bunch of reprobates Mocked God by adding a bunch of extra books to the Bible Which they did not even authorize as being part of the Bible Until the 17th century. It's all a fake To promote Catholic dogmas Which had no real Biblical basis. As God said, whoever adds to His word Shall have added to his punishment You can't really add to eternity But I guess maybe your part of hell will be hotter. Amen. |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
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Re: Poems about the Gospels
I know it is a bit homerish but I submit a haiku to add to the poetry.
He said: it’s written man lives not on bread alone but on words from God matthew 4-4 :jesussmile: |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
What a shame! After returning from a two-year-absence, I have been greeted with the inability to create a thread. Even fervent bouts of prayer did not help! So here is a poem about the bastard children of the world.
Sometimes I do wrong, but I never forget That God will be with me always. And so it’s my job to sling each epithet At God’s sworn enemy, the gays. A Christian’s idea of good, wholesome fun Should not include butt penetration. As Baptists, we should stand together as one And get these gays out of the nation. These lazy-day gays as they spray their perfume Have no place in the United States. To our Christian values we all should exhume And shame these men who masturbate. Won’t you join with me, brothers, in freeing this land? Will you rise up against these hell-spawn? Let’s all pray together that mighty God’s hand Will crush them and let them be gone! |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
Poetry is a great way to praise
and expertly tuned to shame all the gays? Bravo sir! Your condemnation of back door penetration has given me reason to shout If one fag has been saved from damnation with the help of your rhythmic word combination that's something to be proud about :harp: |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
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Joel 1:5 And wail, all you drinkers of wine, Because of the new wine, For it has been cut off from your mouth. Ahem, here goes: Addicted to misery The sweet sting of sadness White wine I'm not 100% about the syllable count - I find it a bit homer-ish getting into the details like that. |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
I don't know what a Haiku is (some sort of fish?) but would like to acknowledge Judges as particularly encouraging, helping us to understand how bad sin really is, particularly from God's point of view, and the steps He's prepared to take in the face of wickedness. Judges 11:1 – 12:7 (excerpts) Now Jephthah the Gileadite was a mighty man of valour, and he was the son of an harlot … Jephthah fled from his brethren, and dwelt in the land of Tob … and it came to pass in process of time, that the children of Ammon made war against Israel … The elders of Gilead went to fetch Jephthah out of the land of Tob and they said unto Jephthah, Come, and be our captain, that we may fight with the children of Ammon … Then the Spirit of the LORD came upon Jephthah … and Jephthah vowed a vow unto the LORD, and said, If thou shalt without fail deliver the children of Ammon into mine hands, then it shall be, that whatsoever cometh forth of the doors of my house to meet me, when I return in peace from the children of Ammon, shall surely be the LORD'S, and I will offer it up for a burnt offering. So Jephthah passed over unto the children of Ammon to fight against them; and the LORD delivered them into his hands … And Jephthah came to Mizpeh unto his house, and, behold, his daughter came out to meet him with timbrels and with dances: and she was his only child … And she said unto him, My father, if thou hast opened thy mouth unto the LORD, do to me according to that which hath proceeded out of thy mouth … he sent her away for two months and she went with her companions, and bewailed her virginity upon the mountains. And it came to pass at the end of two months, that she returned unto her father, who did with her according to his vow which he had vowed … And Jephthah judged Israel six years. Then died Jephthah the Gileadite, and was buried in one of the cities of Gilead. All pretty unambiguous and Jephthah's good character comes shining through, even to the extent of ruling Israel as a Judge (under King God, the Israelites not yet having erred to the extent of demanding a human king) which let's face it is some accolade. The poem will be in green. He was so brave and mighty, His mother was a trollop, What e'er he turned his hand to, He dealt a massive wallop. Ammonites are dreadful scum, Their ethics fully blown; Jephthah made a deal with God, How could he have known? Somewhat moot since God knows all, And at this point His spirit was motivating Jephthah so nit-picking secularists really have their work cut out here, The rout complete he headed home, His daughter knew no fear. To root out sin God killed His son, But Jephthah kills a daughter, A “Thank-you, God for giving me This most impressive slaughter.” |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
O Lord, our creator, our master and friend
On thy Grace, for salvation, all must depend You sent your own Son to suffer for our sins We turn to you now as the End Time begins Save us from witches, gays, Catholics and Jews Bless us as we witness to spread your Good News And help us make this a True Christian™ nation Rapture us, O Lord, from thy tribulation To sing your praises forever will please us When we're in Heaven and sitting near Jesus |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
Stalwart Matthew, pious Mark
Dear Luke and great John Threw the gauntlet at Satan So now it is ON! |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
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I'm reminded of a lovely, heartfelt poem that Sister Clementine read at Mother's funeral (the burial), just before we went for afternoon tea, over at Sister Lulubelle's house. Oh, she made the most delightful summer berry tartlets and cardamon & orange shortbread -- I'll never forget them. And, did you know that it's always best to sprinkle finely-granulated sugar over your shortbread as soon as it is brought from the oven, just before cutting it? Anyway, this poem always brings a tear to my eye, and you may be well-advised to get a handkerchief before reading this, as well: The Lights Are On Up in Heaven, Stars are shining; Down on Earth, We're all whining. Save a place, At :jesus-fancy:' table; We will join you, When we're able. https://media.istockphoto.com/photos...P7Enxr48Mi5P4= |
Re: Poems about the Gospels
A Prayer for Good Ole America
We'll get back to good ole America When the Democrats are all gone No more handouts for the lazy No children on my lawn We'll get back to good ole America When God returns to our schools No more teaching evolution All science is for fools We'll get back to good ole America When women start obeying They'll cook and clean and raise the kids And in their homes be staying We'll get back to good ole America When we stop sparing the rod If children start to misbehave Bring out the cattle prod We'll get back to good ole America When we kill off Medicare We have no more need for doctors With the power of prayer We'll get back to good ole America When the homos are in prison Our marriages will then be safe Jesus, He is risen! We'll get back to good ole America When we win the war on pot Let the marijuana smokers All sit in jail and rot We'll get back to good ole America When we stop making vaccine We just need ivermectin and Hydroxychloroquine We'll get back to good ole America When minorities know their places No more living in the suburbs By those from darker races We'll get back good ole America When Catholics in our nation Ignore the lies that their priests tell Like transubstantiation Well get back to good ole America When we deport all the Jews They all belong in Isra-el Or so says God's good news We'll get back to good ole America When the Muslims disappear We have to kill them over there So they won't kill us here We'll get back to good ole America When we nuke the damned Chinese No stealing all our precious jobs No drinking fruity teas We'll get back to good ole America When Trump's President for life He'll rule us with an iron fist Thus ending all our strife Lord Jesus up in Heaven Please listen to our prayer Bring back good ole America For white Christians everywhere! |
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