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  • #1

    Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

    I figured I would stop in and introduce myself again, Brothers and Sisters!
    I have been gone for a very long time, my Father (and Pastor) saw it fit for me to travel with my Pastor as he went to preach to Unsaved Trash in foreign lands! I have been so blessed! I was able to work with the women and help teach them many useful skills such as cooking, cleaning, and following their Leaders every word.They were rarely at home (as they should have been) but out with Godless heathens doing terrible terrible things! I was able to show them the error of their ways, and many of them met privately with Pastor and were able to be saved after many meetings. He was overjoyed after the meetings and the more women he met with, the happier he was! The happier he was, the more full I felt with the Holy Spirit, I was unable to contain it!!
    After returning home, Father said that Pastor is already planning the next missionary trip and that he would love to have me assist him again!!!
    I am so thrilled to be back and to spread the word about all the great things I have been filled with!!
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  • #2
    Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

    Originally posted by JessicaLovesGod! View Post
    He was overjoyed after the meetings and the more women he met with, the happier he was! The happier he was etc..
    I can tell, even by your precious attempt to create a muted recollection, that your father is a great man of God! And gifted at communicating one-on-one with women who have deep needs. May he continue to extend his vine, his branch, to more women who need the Good News! Thank you for this testimony, on behalf of your father, dear nameless daughter.

    In His Grip,

    Associate Pastor Jon Oliver
    Ezekiel 23:19-20 "Yet she multiplied her whoredoms, in calling to remembrance the days of her youth, wherein she had played the harlot in the land of Egypt.
    For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses."

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

      Do you have a favorite bible verse? What church do you attend? What do you elders think of you being so long-winded?
      This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

        Originally posted by JessicaLovesGod! View Post
        I figured I would stop in and introduce myself again, Brothers and Sisters!
        I have been gone for a very long time, my Father (and Pastor) saw it fit for me to travel with my Pastor as he went to preach to Unsaved Trash in foreign lands! I have been so blessed! I was able to work with the women and help teach them many useful skills such as cooking, cleaning, and following their Leaders every word.They were rarely at home (as they should have been) but out with Godless heathens doing terrible terrible things! I was able to show them the error of their ways, and many of them met privately with Pastor and were able to be saved after many meetings. He was overjoyed after the meetings and the more women he met with, the happier he was! The happier he was, the more full I felt with the Holy Spirit, I was unable to contain it!!
        After returning home, Father said that Pastor is already planning the next missionary trip and that he would love to have me assist him again!!!
        I am so thrilled to be back and to spread the word about all the great things I have been filled with!!
        Jessica, What a blessed, inspiring post! Our LORD has truly blessed you in that you can bring feeble-minded women with great need to your father, that me may come unto them, helping them gird their loins with the truth of our wonderful Word of God, which surely he wields as a sword against the impotent satan. May you bring your father many multitudes of women as you continue your ministry. I assume your mother is maintaining the home as you travel, and rejoices in your sharing the stories of Pastor's miraculous journeys. Godspeed, Dear! Oh, if I could only join you one day!
        1 Samuel 8:13 "And he will take your daughters to be confectionaries, and to be cookes, and to be bakers."
        Naomi Ruth Lamb, Proprietress:
        Naomi's Moist Pie - Unsaved Unwelcome!
        Locations in 50 States and Canada
        !Voted Best Pie in Freehold!
        Once you've tasted Naomi's pie, you'll crave it again and again and again and again.
        Baptist pastors always receive a 50% discount.

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        • #5
          Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

          Originally posted by Jon Bradley View Post
          I can tell, even by your precious attempt to create a muted recollection, that your father is a great man of God! And gifted at communicating one-on-one with women who have deep needs. May he continue to extend his vine, his branch, to more women who need the Good News! Thank you for this testimony, on behalf of your father, dear nameless daughter.

          In His Grip,

          Associate Pastor Jon Oliver

          Oh, I never stated my name! I apologize Pastor, I was just so excited. I'm Jessica

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

            Originally posted by JessicaLovesGod! View Post
            Oh, I never stated my name! I apologize Pastor, I was just so excited. I'm Jessica
            Jessica, how many male children have you bore your husband so far? What church do you attend? What is your favorite bible verse?
            This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

              Originally posted by Chester Longshire View Post
              Jessica, how many male children have you bore your husband so far? What church do you attend? What is your favorite bible verse?
              Unfortunately, I do not have a husband, my Father says he hasn't found a True Christian yet that I am worthy of marrying. I attend First Baptist Church of Detroit (although Father wishes for us to attend a Godly Church with True Christians) and my favorite verse changes often, but they always have to do with submitting to those placed above me!

              Comment

              • #8
                Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

                Originally posted by JessicaLovesGod! View Post
                Unfortunately, I attend First Baptist Church of Detroit
                I'm sorry to hear that you don't have a husband yet. Your reproductive fitness is waning as we speak.

                Why are you in Detroit? Are you of the colored persuasion? If so, don't worry, there is nothing wrong with that in and of itself.
                This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

                  Originally posted by JessicaLovesGod! View Post
                  Unfortunately, I do not have a husband, my Father says he hasn't found a True Christian yet that I am worthy of marrying. I attend First Baptist Church of Detroit (although Father wishes for us to attend a Godly Church with True Christians) and my favorite verse changes often, but they always have to do with submitting to those placed above me!
                  Hi Jessica!

                  I'm glad you did not say you attended the Greater King Solomon Baptist Church in Detroit, because it looks like nobody has attended that one any time recently. (It still looks better than most buildings in this city, though).
                  Attached Files
                  God created fossils to test our faith.

                  * * *

                  My favorite LBC sermons:
                  True Christians are Perfect!
                  True Christian™ Love.
                  Salvation™ made Easy!
                  You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
                  Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
                  Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
                   Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
                  Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
                  The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
                  Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
                  God HATES Rational Thinking!
                  True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

                    Hello and welcome back, Jessica!

                    I suggest in the meantime, you hit the streets of southwest Detroit and minister to the needs of such lost souls:

                    sigpic

                    I Kings 7:23

                    And he made a moulten Sea, ten cubites from the one brim to the other: it was round all about, & his height was fiue cubits: and a line of thirtie cubites did compasse it round about.

                    New here? Desiring to be pleasing in the eyes of The Lord and His Followers?

                    Then do as directed by our esteemed Pastors and head on over to the Introductions subforum and make your first post there, friend. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus. Anything else you want to share with us about how Jesus has blessed you is welcomed too.

                    Are you a hater of God that believes He is a morally bankrupt monster? Read Why, you ask, is God so angry? to see that it is in fact you that is the monster that mercilessly and infinitely torments God.

                    Stop this relentless torturing of God and accept Jesus today!

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

                      Originally posted by Mark L. Snyde, PhD View Post
                      Hello and welcome back, Jessica!

                      I suggest in the meantime, you hit the streets of southwest Detroit and minister to the needs of such lost souls:

                      To be fair, the juggalos believe in God and have renounced atheist-science.
                      This space is reserved for posting KJV Scripture ONLY. --ADMIN

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

                        Originally posted by Chester Longshire View Post
                        To be fair, the juggalos believe in God and have renounced atheist-science.
                        They are a foul, ungodly tribe of demons.
                        Who Will Jesus Damn?

                        Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                        Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                        Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Re: Blessings Brothers and Sisters!

                          Jessica, I'm confused. Are you saying your father is the pastor? Or are they two separate individuals?
                          WARNING:
                          In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                          REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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