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-   -   SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS! (https://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=18794)

Bob4God 01-11-2009 02:44 AM

SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Taste the rainbow, indeed! The homosexual agenda has taken many shapes and sizes, but we have been onto it at every turn of it's quest to recruit our children to the queer lifestyle!

This evening while I was expressing a high degree of intense revulsion at my own nakedness in the shower, the Holy Spirit came upon me and told me to write to all of you about the dangers of these nefarious little candies!

ATTENTION: WOMEN, CHILDREN, AND THOSE WITH WEAK SPIRITUAL CONSTITUTIONS SHOULD NOT CONTINUE!


http://www.iomny.com/innercontinenta...5_skittles.jpg

Right off the bat we can see that these sodomite sweets are attractively decorated with the bright colors of the rainbow, which was long ago adopted as the homo calling card.

The term "Original Fruit" is splattered across the top of the packaging, which is homosexual code language for "virgin testicles." There was a 200% increase in Skittles sales when they started using that slogan. At the same time, incidents of homosexuals abducting and raping young Christian boys skyrocketed. Coincidence? I doubt it. :glare:

http://www.photosandiego.com/blog/archives/skittles.jpghttp://online.wsj.com/media/skittles...0302182708.jpg

When we view Skittles closeup, it is obvious that they have been modeled after a) the male buttocks, or b) testicles.

Each color of Skittles has a different meaning. Homosexuals will keep a variety of these in their pockets, and when they see a potential homosexual or homosexual recruit, they will attempt to hand-feed it into their mouth. According to the color, that is what the "host" wants to do with the "guest."

GREEN: Fornicate in a public park

YELLOW: Abduct a christian man and take turns urinating on his face

RED: Spank the "guest's" behind with a leather strap

ORANGE: Fornicate with vegetables stolen from a True Christian farmer

BROWN: The "host" will insert Skittles candies 'up there' and then pay the "vendor" with a kiss every time he wants a pile of candies excreted into his palm or even directly into his mouth! :fear2:

Friends, I am calling for a ban on ALL Skittles products, whether it be food, clothing or decorative ornaments! THERE IS REASON TO BELIEVE THAT SKITTLES MAY BE INJECTED WITH THE AIDS OR SOME KIND OF GAY CHEMICAL THAT CAUSES AN ADDICTION TO SAME SEX ACTIVITY!

If you find your children eating these candies, TAKE THEM AWAY AT ONCE AND BEAT YOUR KIDS FOR EXPERIMENTING IN THE HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLE!

MAY GOD KEEP YOUR FAMILIES SAFE!

Daisy Mae Johnson 01-11-2009 07:48 AM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
I was going to comment on this vile abomination..but fainted after reading it. You can better believe that NOOOOO Skittles will ever be purchased again at the Johnson Residence!

I can't click back on this thread (for fear that I will faint again) but will ALERT a GODLY Pastor.


In JESUS'S name Amen!

Shinigami 01-11-2009 08:59 AM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
I never liked the things. The flavors were completely gay and all that. Back in the day the real candy of real men was Warheads. You ate one and got hairs on your chest for doing it! Real man's "take the skin off the back of your throat" kind of sour. No queers and homers allowed!

Pastor Al E Pistle 01-11-2009 09:13 AM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bob4God (Post 281796)
Each color of Skittles has a different meaning. Homosexuals will keep a variety of these in their pockets, and when they see a potential homosexual or homosexual recruit, they will attempt to hand-feed it into their mouth. According to the color, that is what the "host" wants to do with the "guest."

GREEN: Fornicate in a public park

YELLOW: Abduct a christian man and take turns urinating on his face

RED: Spank the "guest's" behind with a leather strap

ORANGE: Fornicate with vegetables stolen from a True Christian farmer

BROWN: The "host" will insert Skittles candies 'up there' and then pay the "vendor" with a kiss every time he wants a pile of candies excreted into his palm or even directly into his mouth! :fear2:

Friends, I am calling for a ban on ALL Skittles products, whether it be food, clothing or decorative ornaments! THERE IS REASON TO BELIEVE THAT SKITTLES MAY BE INJECTED WITH THE AIDS OR SOME KIND OF GAY CHEMICAL THAT CAUSES AN ADDICTION TO SAME SEX ACTIVITY!

If you find your children eating these candies, TAKE THEM AWAY AT ONCE AND BEAT YOUR KIDS FOR EXPERIMENTING IN THE HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLE!

MAY GOD KEEP YOUR FAMILIES SAFE!

My GOD, brother! This post caught me right after dinner and I threw up reading it. In fact, I had heart palpitations and had to take a nitro tablet and drink a snifter of pre-French cognac.

It was a a waste of perfectly good fricasseed spotted-owl and sea-turtle soup. This is a wonderful example of the maniacal homer agenda, but PLEASE make your warning a bit clearer or post in red letters. Is there no limit to what qweers and goths will do to ruin our youth?

Have a care, Brother. Sea turtle is VERY expensive and will be as long as it's on the endangered species list. No one notices when a couple of owls go missing, but they are a taste treat as well!

eliot mayfield 01-11-2009 01:00 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Candy has long been a way for the Homers too lure children into their grip.

Ezekiel Bathfire 01-11-2009 02:02 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bob4God (Post 281796)
THERE IS REASON TO BELIEVE THAT SKITTLES MAY BE INJECTED WITH THE AIDS OR SOME KIND OF GAY CHEMICAL THAT CAUSES AN ADDICTION TO SAME SEX ACTIVITY!

After research at the Biblical Science Laboratory at Landover Christian University, we have narrowed this down to Canuba wax.
However, before I present our findings, let me remind you that, on average, there are 42 Skittles in a pack! And what is 42? According to the despicable atheist author of “The Hitchiker’s Guide To The Galaxy,” it is “the answer to the world, the universe and everything”! Yes, dear reader, we know that God is the answer to the world, the universe and everything yet Skittles claim they are! They are “of The Devil”!

42? Coincidence? I think not!

And now to canuba wax. To wax means to coat with wax; this is to lower friction and who, in this context, other than a homer would want too “lower friction”???? :fear2:

O the iniquity!

Bob4God 01-11-2009 04:02 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire (Post 281957)
And now to canuba wax. To wax means to coat with wax; this is to lower friction and who, in this context, other than a homer would want too “lower friction”???? :fear2:

O the iniquity!

Indeed Brother Bathfire, but I suspect the debauchery runs deeper than that! It is possible that this canuba wax is the same kind of wax they use to purge themselves of the GODly mass of hair that the LORD has blessed all humans with to help hide their shame. With gleeful delight, homers RIP the hair from their bodies to shamelessly parade their dirty bits around for all to see with the help of canuba wax! MAY GOD EITHER REDEEM THEM OR BROIL THEM IN HELL FOREVER!

Ezekiel Bathfire 01-11-2009 04:23 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bob4God (Post 281979)
Indeed Brother Bathfire, but I suspect the debauchery runs deeper than that! It is possible that this canuba wax is the same kind of wax they use to purge themselves of the GODly mass of hair that the LORD has blessed all humans with to help hide their shame. With gleeful delight, homers RIP the hair from their bodies to shamelessly parade their dirty bits around for all to see with the help of canuba wax! MAY GOD EITHER REDEEM THEM OR BROIL THEM IN HELL FOREVER!

I think you have it right there Brother B4G! Your moderate reply does you credit. :thumbsup:

Daisy Mae Johnson 01-11-2009 05:31 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
2 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by eliot mayfield (Post 281950)
Candy has long been a way for the Homers too lure children into their grip.

You can say that again!

Pastor Al E Pistle 01-11-2009 05:57 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Ezekiel Bathfire (Post 281957)
And now to canuba wax. To wax means to coat with wax; this is to lower friction and who, in this context, other than a homer would want too “lower friction”???? :fear2:

O the iniquity!

Lord of Hosts, Bathfire! It is only 8am here and the thought of Haysus rubbing carnuba wax on my new limo made me toss my soft-boiled eggs and toast.:angry:

openmind 01-11-2009 07:58 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
I would like to point out that M&Ms are the same shape as skittles, as well as also being rainbow.
So, are they gay too? :devil:

Nobar King 01-11-2009 08:02 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by openmind (Post 282086)
I would like to point out that M&Ms are the same shape as skittles, as well as also being rainbow.
So, are they gay too? :devil:

These ones sure are:
http://a6.vox.com/6a00c2251c200c8fdb...9cb60002-500pi

openmind 01-11-2009 08:06 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
because they are pink?

it is just a color, how can it make something homosexual?

eliot mayfield 01-11-2009 08:10 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by openmind (Post 282090)
because they are pink?

it is just a color, how can it make something homosexual?

The real problem is things being made homosexual. The rainbow used to be a sign from God, until the gays corrupted it.

openmind 01-11-2009 08:13 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Why can't it be just what it is- a rainbow.

Not a symbol for anything, just red, orange, yellow, green, and blue sitting side by side.

I fail to see how a candy is gay.

eliot mayfield 01-11-2009 08:16 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by openmind (Post 282094)
Why can't it be just what it is- a rainbow.

Not a symbol for anything, just red, orange, yellow, green, and blue sitting side by side.

I fail to see how a candy is gay.

The gays want to bend everything to their agenda. The are the second biggest threat to America at the present time.

openmind 01-11-2009 08:24 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Actually they wanted a flag for their community. The rainbow represents their wide diversity AND equality.

Bob4God 01-11-2009 08:28 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by openmind (Post 282101)
Actually they wanted a flag for their community. The rainbow represents their wide diversity AND equality.

WRONG. Satan craftily nudged the gays towards taking the rainbow as their symbol in order to insult GOD's promise never to destroy the Earth with water again. It's just one more way of hocking a loogie in the face of CHRIST. :angry:

eliot mayfield 01-11-2009 08:31 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by openmind (Post 282101)
Actually they wanted a flag for their community. The rainbow represents their wide diversity AND equality.

Gays are not now, nor have been, nor every will be equal while God is alive. That means forever!

openmind 01-11-2009 08:32 PM

Re: SKITTLES: THE CANDY OF QUEERS! OUTRAGEOUS PERVERTED HORRORS!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bob4God (Post 282103)
WRONG. Satan craftily nudged the gays towards taking the rainbow as their symbol in order to insult GOD's promise never to destroy the Earth with water again. It's just one more way of hocking a loogie in the face of CHRIST. :angry:


That is an outrageous claim! It makes absolutely no sense.
But, this does::

LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) Pride (1978)
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...y_flag.svg.png http://upload.wikimedia.org/skins/co...gnify-clip.png
Pride flag (LGBT community)


Main article: Pride flag (LGBT community)
The rainbow flag, sometimes called 'the freedom flag', was popularized as a symbol of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) pride and diversity by San Francisco artist Gilbert Baker in 1978. The different colours symbolize diversity in the gay community, and the flag is used predominantly at gay pride events and in gay villages worldwide in various forms including banners, clothing and jewelry.

Originally created with eight colors, pink and turquoise were removed for production purposes and as of 2008, it consists of six colored stripes, which should always be displayed with red on top or to left. Aside from the obvious symbolism of a mixed LGBT community, the colors were designed to symbolize: red (life), orange (healing), yellow (sunlight), green (nature), blue (harmony), and purple/violet (spirit). It is most commonly flown with the red stripe on top, as the colours appear in a natural rainbow.[11]


The flag has very positive meanings! :innocent:


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