My Ministry to The Japs
As you all know, I spend quite a bit of time over in Godless Japan. I thought it might be useful (okay, and the Board of Elders insisted) that I start posting some of my findings from slantland, the better to keep you all safe (and my budget intact).
This is the kind of thing I have to put up with over there. :angry: They call these "manjoo" which is japspeak for "man juice" I'm pretty sure. They're sold on every street corner. :thumbdown: Here's a sale at a department store. Can you imagine? You can't avoid seeing the local monkeys sporting shirts with obscenities on them. Japan isn't safe for decent people. Here's the local meat market. You don't wanna know. Here's a local festival. They actually worship big American tallywhackers like this one. That's all for now. Ask if you've got questions. |
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THIS group of jungle chinks are being persecuted for being Christians, and I'm the one that brought them to Christ!
Well, mostly. They don't really understand Christ's Blessings, and they are suspicious that they won't be let into Heaven on account of them being little yellow devils. Plus they want to bow down to statues of Jesus, because they're used to doing that to their ex-god, the obese chinaman "Boodha." And now the government wants to force them to spit in Christ's face and start worshiping the fat chink god again. See what I have to go through? You can't win for losing. It took me 2 years to get those slants to convert! And now look at them: they won't even take a beating for Christ! :angry: Quote:
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The way that slant-eyed trollop is chugging down that dessert dong really gets my dander up.
http://i113.photobucket.com/albums/n...ansemanjoo.jpg Also, as an American and an entrepreneur, I am outraged that the Japs didn't have the economic ingenuity to sell the testicles separately, and the testicles themselves individually. Their profits would have been tripled. Now, I am the humblest person on God's great, green earth--I literally taught lessons in humility at Oral Roberts University back in the '70s--but those tallywackers are laughable. I lost three quarters of my sizable Johnson back in the war, and I still have them beat by a long shot. |
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And he's obviously the father. How cold can a man be?! :angry: |
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Are those things nip Twinkies®?
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They have the damndest things to drink over here in slope land. This stuff isn't bad. Tastes like pickles a little.
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They definitely eat weird things, these little Asians.
But they are a studious bunch. I have to give them that. |
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THIS is the latest craze to sweep the slants: "The Masturbation Diet."
It was started by a chink who wanted to find a way to lose weight and offend Jesus at the same time. :angry: Quote:
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I hope you were fully immunized before rubbing shoulders with them Gooks. I'd stay well away from them if I were you. I don't know if it was Nagasaki or Fukoshima but seem to have radiation problems that can pixilate the area around your genitals.
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Hello Pastor Ezekiel.
I do not know how you can work around those people they smell bad. After I killed my wife it was an accident I had a chinaman helping me and all he would eat was rotten cabbage he called it kimchee I am not making that name up. The chinaman would have very bad flatulence because he ate rotten cabbage and I told him I would fire him if he did not stop. He told me ha ha ha ha even Jesus farted and I called him a blasphemer but he said he would look it up and the next day he said it was in Luke 12:55 it says: And when ye see the south wind blow, ye say, There will be heat; and it cometh to pass. He said ha ha ha ha ha the south wind makes heat and then he pointed at his bottom and then I fired him and now a colored girl works for me she smells like coconuts which is nice. Thank you. Rusty |
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YIC |
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I'll tell you what, I am in constant danger over there in slant-land. Look what I have to deal with! :o
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Now I ask you, who's going to believe a lying chink? Who's going to believe that a family of 6 can be fed on a tiny gook tallywhacker? :lol: |
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Pastor Ezekiel, I shall pray that the Coq Au Vin you are served there is the crowing variety of cock and not the flowing variety. :pray:
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What is it about the slopes that makes them fascinated by the effluvium of humanity?
Genesis 38:9-10 And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother. And the thing which he did displeased the Lord: wherefore he slew him also. God bless |
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I'm surpised he didn't use a little nutmeg.
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Well the slants have found a new way of enraging Jesus, and I'm sorry to say I was witness to it. Some jap invited me to be a judge at what I thought was going to be a Bible Recitation contest. Once inside, the doors are bolted and THIS is what happened next. :fear2:
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